I Missed Again
by DirectionOfTime
Summary: KakaSaku: His students are all grown up, but something doesn't seem quite right with Sakura and Kakashi's determined to find out just what the problem is... shame all Sakura wants is for him to mind his own business.
1. Chapter 1

Ok! The title is taken from the song: _I Missed Again_ by Phil Collins (well worth a listen :D) And it's kinda... Sorta a songfic, many chapter titles will be taken from lyrics, although not all (i.e. this chapter title isn't from the song).

This is, essentially a series of short one-shots, which is quite unusual for me (I tend to dislike short chapters, one-shots etc, perfering length and detail etc) however, this format seemed oddly appropriate here, I hope you agree!

I hope you enjoy as well! I really do love KakaSaku and eventually these little shorts will contain lots of 'fluff' and romance and the like, but no lemons (shocking, I know) but with a bit of luck these this will turn out as something cute and thoughtful... Please let me know if you think I'm straying too far off track! .~!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_1. Two Bells for Three Wheels_

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><p>Kakashi was a man who did not, generally, understand or particularly enjoy the company of women in an informal setting. A sexual setting was one thing, as well as a very long saga of irritation (on his part) and complaints on theirs, (apparently knowing him for a few hours or the space of (<em>x)<em> number of drinks meant they had a right to know things he kept from even his closest friends). He'd had no real experience being friendly with women; he had no memories of even his own mother, a single photograph told him what she looked like. One or two stories told to him weren't enough to display her character and he figured, that people always spoke of the dead in the kindest possible way, so he'd never gathered enough information even to construct the loosest idea of her.

From his earliest memories it had been himself and his father.

(And it quickly tumbled down to being himself and a man who looked eerily like his father, but held barely a shred of the man Kakashi knew as a child.)

After Sakumo's death, Kakashi's experience working with females manifested itself in the form of Rin; at the academy he was too young for gender to even hold meaning beyond why some wore skirts and others trousers. Of course, by the time he'd been assigned to Team Minato, he'd steeled himself against everybody – be they male or female, Obito drove him up the wall and made a mockery of everything Kakashi had laboured for. Rin? Intelligent, a peacemaker between himself and Obito, apparently she'd liked him – for whatever reason – but his recent promotion by the time of _that_ mission, she was little more than another part of the scenery – and a cause for Obito be even more annoying than he already was.

When Kakashi first made it to collect Team 7, a comfortable three hours late, the three genin really were a sight; they couldn't have been more oddly different to each other if they'd tried, in looks and personality. Sasuke – the classic arrogance gained by living and growing up in isolation (but having known _past tense_ what it meant to have the love of a parent) couldn't have been more obvious – he unapologetically spoke and acted according to what he thought was right. Which was usually wrong about in terms of social standards, but Kakashi couldn't teach him things like that, only a parent could, if they weren't dead. Although Sasuke had played himself in the team dynamic, he was the blood-memory of Obito.

Naruto? Idiotic, annoying but endlessly cheerful and looked on the bright side of everything; he was the sun to Sasuke's moon in many ways, Naruto had no memory of having company or others to share in failure and success the way Sasuke had. They'd suffered in such different but identical ways they'd ended up on opposite ends of the spectrum. He was his sensei's son and legacy, Minato held a carefree and gentle ease Kakashi couldn't understand at that age – how was there time to relax? What was there to be so happy about? But Naruto was Obito and Minato in nature and therefore bearable to Kakashi.

Sakura? The unknown but not unexpected quantity for Kakashi, as he'd cynically predicted her thoughts were _only_ focussed on the opposite gender – Sasuke for her 'romantic' intentions and Naruto to vent her frustrations. Sakura was too feisty and held to much raw passionate spirit but with pathetic skills for him to compare her to Rin. Well, initially at least.

During that first bell test she'd demonstrating intelligence and depth of thought he wouldn't have anticipated had he not read their files.

He knew – everybody knew – that the last Uchiha, with all of the clan's arrogance and hatred manifested in one young boy as well as the son of the Fourth Hokage (who also happened to be the Kyuubi Jinchuurik) was going to call for almost all of his time and they were arguably paramount out of all of the genin who graduated that year. Sakura was unlucky enough to be the third wheel who lost out when the boys proverbially 'took the two bells' of Kakashi attention. The girl left out of the group of boys; she was just about tough enough to not take it to heart, but Kakashi could see how heavily it weighed on her slender shoulders.

The years flew by, Naruto and Sasuke held his attention the most – he had memories to honour, mistakes to correct and debts to be paid.

Sasuke had been a royal failure.

Naruto, held his own with or without Kakashi's attention (in favour of Jiraiya's) and Sakura disappeared off the radar and under Tsunade's wing – Kakashi was free to resume his normal Jounin life. He was thankful, somewhat, to be free of how annoying they could all be – in their own ways – Sakura, for example, represented not only everything he couldn't understand, but everything which reminded him of how he disliked women, those of the female persuasion, he was glad to live his own single, male life again.

Doubtless they'd return to him when necessary.

It was easy, whilst he didn't see any of them that he was just about satisfied with the job he'd done – if anything it was Sasuke which weighed the heaviest. But he did know he'd failed Sakura too, he couldn't even remember if he'd ever complimented her on anything, even when she mastered chakra tree-climbing his 'compliment' had only been a dig at her gender and an egg on to the boys.

What sort of teacher never compliments his student? He _missed_...

He didn't know what he was expecting when Naruto returned but Sakura's strength and maturity was a pleasant surprise. Even so, his attention was on Naruto, the boy now had to watch his back even more carefully – the Akatsuki was on the move and Kakashi couldn't afford play around as they had in the old days. Unfortunately, that too meant Sakura was forced to take a back seat - at least he could leave her with the Suna elder _Chiyo, _Kakashi _had _to protect Naruto, he couldn't afford for the Akatsukito get their hands on the Kyuubi. When Sakura and Chiyo caught them up, Kakashi barely able to move from over exertion whilst she and Chiyo appeared in front of them, the elder looking exhausted but Sakura with no more than a few nasty grazes. All Kakashi had to say was,

"You did well finding this place," A little girl and an old woman defeated an Akatsuki member and all he had to say was, _well, you fought and killed an Akatsuki, whilst working with a woman you'd only met the day previous, let alone never worked with and carried her whilst you caught up with Naruto and I who haven't even gotten half way to killing him yet, but good work on following us, anyway!_

Had he assumed that it was all Chiyo's work? Of course he had...Once again he'd underestimated the strength of the only Kuniochi he'd ever 'taught' and even after she'd done what probably no other of her peer group could, beside Naruto, he _still _ hadn't found the words to compliment her skill... Unfortunately it was all too easy.

It was just so easy to brush Sakura aside whilst she was just a little girl.


	2. Chapter 2

Part 2! Hope you're liking this! I like to think it's moving swiftly enough, but not rushed!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_2. I Think about it from Time to Time, When I'm Lonely and on My Own_

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><p>But Sakura was a woman.<p>

Kakashi found it completely bizarre that he felt so much more disarmed and unsettled by an adult Sakura that he ever did with her being a strangely perceptive child. Although Kakashi, for reasons unfathomable to himself, had generally little trouble attracting a woman as company for the evening, he was happy with just that – one night. He never mistreated any of his varying partners (which were few and far between, he could easily enough find outlets for sexual tension which _didn't_ involve any complaints, arguments or drunken rambling) nor did he delude them into thinking it was more than it was: a one night stand. Yet, he still found most women irritating to the point of him using them just for 'sleeping' with was too much hassle; there were, of course, one or two exceptions to his general impression.

One was Kurenai, she was intelligent, beautiful and above all, _not_ over bearing; she never expected of Kakashi more than he was willing to give – although Kakashi would never say in so many words, he would give as much time to Kurenai as she needed. It crossed his mind that most of his benevolence to her was directly because of Asuma, Kakashi had always had something of a friend in the smoker and he still missed him. When Asuma began to genuinely get serious with her, Kakashi wasn't quite able to understand his desire to be so close and constant with her, after all, they literally lived on a knife edge.

But he did and Kakashi admired her ability to continue on with their son, stoic and strong as ever, talking about Asuma to their son whenever she could. Instilling a sense of pride about his father, something Kakashi couldn't relate to, stories of his mother only appeared whenever Sakumo was in a particularly nostalgic mood and they were so ambiguous that it took Kakashi until he was closing on 24 to understand one of two he was told. Yes, Kakashi loved and admired Kurenai for _her _love and honour of Asuma's memory, as well as her love and patience for him whilst he was alive.

But Kurenai was a Kuniochi.

She never made any demands on Asuma, never berated him for his life style, she never complained about his smoking, mostly, Kakashi surmised, because she _knew_ what a shinobi lifestyle meant. How hard it was to leave the warmth of home to go and kill in cold blood, to slaughter whoever it was and then return home to act like nothing had happened. Kurenai knew these things and how hard they were on Asuma's natural temperament – he enjoyed the simple things. Kakashi, in a sense, loved Kurenai for how she treated Asuma and that she made him happy; Kakashi couldn't image how Asuma must have felt in his dying moments knowing he was leaving both the woman he loved and their child.

Kakashi didn't particularly want to know, either, a part of him thought it irresponsible to have a child with someone when you could (and most likely would) end up dying in the field, leaving one parent to care for the child. Or, at worse, both parents were lost and the child had to look after itself. Kakashi himself knowing the loss and loneliness of his parents dying young and could never bear to inflict the same on his own children. _If_he ever had any, which was highly unlikely for many reasons.

The other woman, Kakashi found himself surprised at the realization, was Sakura.

He knew precisely the moment he became completely comfortable with her: it was after he'd walked out of Tsunade's office and straight into the arms of Sakura. She was on her way home and came across Kakashi, just out of the Hokage tower and her from a hospital shift, but she grabbed him around the chest placing his arm over her shoulders without hesitation and guided his semi-conscious form towards her apartment. It was closer.

He had vague recollections of her saying the occasional words to him whilst she unlocked her front door and laid him down on a pull-out futon, removing almost very article of clothing he had – bar his mask and underpants, whilst she healed his almost endless covering of wounds. His mind was foggy, a combination of over exhaustion, blood loss and lack of a decent meal for some four days previously had taken its toll; when he awoke, it was see Sakura with a hand on his forehead and her closed eyes with a facial expression of concentration, it took a moment to decide if he'd actually survived or not.

"Morning," She seemed to know of his consciousness before she opened her eyes and removed her hand; he opened his mouth to speak, but it was too dry to form words, "I'll get you a glass of water," She returned moments later, "You had a really lucky escape, Kakashi, that gash was a nasty piece of work," She smiled at him then, as though he was an old friend she hadn't seen in years – the silver-haired shinobi felt an involuntary twitch at his masked lips, begging him to return the smile. But she turned away and was gone before he could do so much as react.

It hadn't bothered him in the slightest that he was only in two separate (and very small) articles of clothing under a blanket in her home, she spoke gently but not patronizingly and in a caring but not distantly professional manner. She was Sakura looking after Kakashi; not a medic looking after a patient. She made him a meal, sat and chatted with him when she felt like it; she'd told him that she had the late shift that day – starting at 12.00 and that he should stay resting at least until tomorrow morning – she cheekily made sure that he stayed put by placing his clothes in the wash just before she left. Kakashi realized how familiar and comforting her scent was – he had no other associations with it other than that of his cute, pink haired Kuniochi.

He'd slept so restfully on her little pull-out futon apparently reserved for impromptu and incapacitated guests, that he hadn't even wanted to move until she wandered in through her front door – apparently shocked that he was still where she told him to be. He'd never felt quite so rested as he had done that time, she helped him dress again – a typically embarrassing affair for the usually stoic and completely self-reliant Copy-Nin, but there was a way in which Sakura acted that made him feel completely at ease.

It was one of the few utterly pleasant memories he held and wondered, sometimes, how easy it would be just to hang out with Sakura, to have her sat close by chatting with him – no expectation from (or injury of) either – just an informal keeping of company. There were occasional nights were he was almost tempted to seek her out, to drop in under some silly pretext and just spend a little time getting to know the _person_ she'd grown into. She held no asinine infatuations (it seemed), no ulterior motive (unless he was being especially stubborn about some health check or other) and no false pretence – she was a young, beautiful woman who was complete comfortable with herself.

He doubted, though, that she would be happy to make time for him – in a social setting – he knew next to nothing about her –at least until that night a few weeks ago where he's stayed on her little futon whilst he recuperated and even so he'd still learned _nothing_ about her. He really hadn't realized how shallow he must have thought her, that before he was in her apartment and realized that whatever expectation he'd subconsciously had, hadn't been met _even vaguely._

A part of him was very curious about the adult Sakura – she'd been so easy to figure out as a child and yet here, he could sense an aloofness and distance from himself he wasn't used to. Perhaps it was just the realization that he'd never _known_ Sakura; he couldn't possibly have due to the fact he'd barely said a handful of complete sentences specifically to her during their genin days. A part of him _wanted_ to get to know her, to pick apart the hidden seams he could see in her and figure out what made her tick but he didn't really understand why... Maybe it was the silly sentimental part of him which missed they days of him being so respected by them that now Naruto and Sasuke were busy off elsewhere (Sasuke still a missing-nin) and Naruto working hard on S and A ranked missions desperately trying to earn the skills and experience necessary to take over from Tsunade as Hokage.

On those rare nights alone where even a copy of _Icha Icha Violence_ wasn't quite enough to occupy him, he never would have thought, looking at her twelve year old self, that an adult, 23 year old version of her would prove such a fascination to a now 37 year old Copy Nin.


	3. Chapter 3

I know that the tense changes in this chapter from the last two, but I hope it's consistent throughout the chapter itself. The tenses may randomly change between chapters...

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again <em>**

_3. It Seems I was Waiting in Line..._

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><p>Kakashi is sat in the Jounin lounge, his eye is on the book but his mind is wandering; since Sakura walked in through the door, he's been trying to read <em>between <em>the lines. There's that same detachment in her, he can see the grace and fluidity of movement earned by a Kuniochi's lifestyle, but there's a clumsiness somewhere in her shadow, as though there is something dragging on her. She's quick, pleasant and polite as always, her actions graceful and her voice easy, but the longer she stays, the clearer it becomes – she doesn't enjoy that Jounin touching her arm as he praises her for a job well done on the last mission. She keeps an emotional distance he would have thought uncharacteristic for Sakura.

But of course, he doesn't know her.

He watches carefully as she sits to fill out what's presumably paperwork, her expression is serious, but glazed – as though she isn't really there. Or that there isn't really anyone else around her; there is a task, she completes it. He subtly continues to watch but he can also see other eyes on her, some are those of youngsters – who only see her physical beauty – he doubts they see what he does. If he were to never see Sakura again or have her, on occasion, so personally involved with him (i.e. she's literally seen almost every square inch of him in the process of healing his numerous wounds) then he wouldn't have all that much trouble taking her to bed for a night. But he can't – she's close and far at the same time – even if she agreed to it, Kakashi doesn't like the distance he can see in her, _there's that hollowness again..._ A young man walks up to her, forcing her attention off her work and onto him, her eyes are cold and movements mechanical.

Kakashi could almost twitch his fingers in time with her movements;

- _Right Index finger: bend at second knuckle to get her mouth to smile_

- _Left pinkie: curl to blink the eyes_

- _Right two middle fingers: curl to get the head to turn sideways_

- _Left thumb and Right two middle fingers: curl simultaneously to tilt up the head a little..._

She really does look like a puppet, but Kakashi is having a hard time telling if she _is_ the puppet who lacked strings or the master who'd lost her mannequin – what happened? No nasty event had ever reached his ears which could explain her behaviour. The boy takes a seat at the table, Kakashi can see his profile and he's oblivious to her fake, ugly smile. She looks _tired_ and Kakashi wonders how she can bare that look – he knows it well, he was _tired_ at that age too, but he'd already put up with a lot. To his knowledge, Sakura – although her life had been by no means easy – she certainly hasn't been subjected to the worst by a very long shot. But then, what did he know? Sometimes even the smallest thing can be the trigger to send an individual spiralling into depression; is that what this looks like?

He can't be sure; she doesn't wear it well though, he _does_ know that.

Could it just be over work? It's possible; Kakashi wonders how she looks alone, does she still smirk like a fake or does she allow her guard to drop and the 'smile' to fade into nothing? He surprises himself at how little he cares for what was actually wrong but rather, he just wanted to follow it – and Sakura. Will he be able to figure out what it is: whether she was a string-less puppet or mannequin-less master just by observing her? It will certainly keep him busy for the next few days. He isn't so cruel or uncaring as to wish her harm or not care enough to fix whatever may be wrong, but his intuition tells him that it isn't nearly so simple as, 'hello Sakura-chan, what's wrong?' Even if they _had_ been incredibly close, he still doubts whether it would work. The insecurities she must have felt as a child over being weak and useless doubtlessly still weigh heavily and perhaps, if he were to so much as _hint_ that he knew something _may_ be wrong, she'd probably shut him out.

(And maybe give him a punch for good measure.)

Yes, he has no missions for the next week or so and he could do with something of a hobby. If tailing her gives him no clues to work with, then he'll have to get a little closer, but what 'Kakashi' would she respond to?

Serious and to the point?

Adult?

Goofy?

Sensei?

Helpless?

Oblivious?

Doting? (Though he reckons that it will probably seem too weird if he turns up out of the blue and acts like a loving friend)

Indifferent?

In all his years in the field and hiding behind a mask, Kakashi has learned very well how to read people; even if it took time, he could instantly spot what persona would get a response out of his target. Kakashi has a very large number of practiced personas to work on Sakura. Despite having "_known_" her for over a decade, still can't be certain which persona will crack open the façade and allow him a look into what she's really thinking and feeling. The prospect of a challenge such as this one, the Copy-Nin finds, is actually quite exciting – to unmask an actor in the middle of a performance without their knowledge.

He could have a lot of fun.

Something to occupy him, at least.

Anyway, shouldn't Tsunade have noticed by now that her young apprentice was a little... _off_?

And where is Naruto? He'd do almost anything for his dear Sakura-chan if he thought she wasn't happy.

It's all by the by: he has something to occupy him and if it turns out that Sakura really _is _unhappy, then he could be the loving sensei who figures it out and helps her.

Simple.

And even that boy currently (and rather rudely) draining her attention is proving useful – whilst someone holds her attention he can study her reactions.

Stimulus and response; the perfect way to study a specimen.

He really does hope that she'll get rid of that ugly, fake smile soon though, it's so unbecoming... What happened to that adorably unabashed gleeful smile of her mid-teens?

_A real smile and a fake one are so easy to distinguish: one is beautiful and the other ugly._ At least he won't have much trouble discerning when she is genuinely happy, then.

With his purpose in mind, he carefully flips a page to make it seem that he is still reading as he trained his attention on his once, long-ago pseudo-student.


	4. Chapter 4

Sorry, I know the fluff is a long time comming but it will be there! In great quantities lol, but it takes a little while for Kakashi and Sakura to get close. I know things also probably seem a little sinister at the moment, but I want to explore different aspects of Kakashi's personality through out these little snippets!

_Thank you for all peeps to reviewed and put me on 'story alert' as well as favourited this story, your support really means a lot! :D_**_  
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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_4. I Can Feel it Coming at Me, Yes I Can Feel it Coming at me..._

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><p>Despite spending most of her time trapped in the hospital, Sakura really does still possess the beautiful fluidity of an active field shinobi. Kakashi watches carefully as her movements are perfectly connected; a punch flows into a kick, which flows into another as her hands mould together in seals. Her face is perfectly passive too, giving nothing away; except perhaps a mild crinkle on her nose as she charges and directs the chakra to her knuckles. It's not a lot, but Kakashi knows precisely what her next move is from that little crinkle; she'll have to work on that.<p>

He'd followed her to the most secluded training ground after her shift at the hospital, she walked slowly through the centre of Konoha, plenty of people stopped to say hello. Many of her shinobi peers stopped for an entire chat and throughout them all they were fake smiles. Admittedly, the workmanship on each smile was a little higher for those she was closer to, but fake nonetheless; Kakashi's stealth tactics got a real run for their money as she took some of the winding paths which had no obvious hiding spots. He wondered if she knew he was there, but she made no move against him, if she did.

Her body language still suggested fatigue her movements were slow and languid on her walk like her joints ached and muscles were sore. But as soon as she arrived and began stretching her mood changed and a sudden weight seemed to disappear, she bent herself in every possible fashion and her body and mind seemed to loosen at the same time.

If she ever had strings, they were certainly cut from a sentient puppet this time.

She moves easily and in time to a silent rhythm in her head, each move and stroke without falter. If she makes practice this easy looking and almost as though she were _enjoying_ it, why was she always so hesitant to join himself, Naruto and Sai for practice? She always manages some excuse, an extra hospital shift, training with Tsunade-shishou, _paperwork_ for Tsunade-shishou... always something which allowed her to avoid a minimum of half a week, usually more training sessions. He hadn't really thought much of it before, Sakura, after all, acted as a second assistant to the Hokage and the sennin didn't waste the extra pair of hands. But after he began to notice this funny aura to Sakura, it almost clicked into place: was it something to do with Team 7? What if she-

_There! There was a genuine grin! _It was just as she smashed another crater into the ground and a tiny twitch of her lips – very little to speak of so most would probably have missed it, but Kakashi's eagle eye spotting its target now had a very good idea of just _how_ faked the other smiles are. He hasn't once looked away from Sakura since he began his observation a few hours ago and all of his attention is focussed solely on trying to peace together the puzzle in front of him; is being alone the key? How bizarre, for a woman whose work _revolves_ around others, why would she be such a loner? And the Sakura he remembers was very empathetic, she could connect with others on an emotional level in a heartbeat – literally. Is she so cold now, that-

_There's another smile, but that one was a fake, why would she bother with a fake smile alone? _Kakashi worried for an instant that she knows he is there, but surely she wouldn't show him a real smile without good cause, right? And why then bother with another fake smile?

It was as though she was playing a twisted game of _duck, duck, goose_ [1].

Would it be possible for _him_ to get her to show a genuine smile? His male ego gives a small _grin_ at the thought and wants to agree, of course he could. If its being alone which gives her the opportunity to relax-

_Wow, what a smile! _For the first time, it seems, Sakura gave a wide, genuinely joyful smile, a broad teasing over her lips to reveal a few teeth, she actually looks happy- he can feel it radiating off her as she executes a complex Jutsu. If she lost half her clothes, tightened the remaining ones and flashed that smile, she'd have any and every man falling over himself. Maybe he wouldn't be so adverse to taking her to bed for a night, or maybe getting to know her a little more; it would definitely take much more observation for him to figure this out.

He was always perceived by them an aloof loner, if she likes to be alone then she can be alone with _him_; it won't be that hard. She moves off again and he is quick to follow, follow her right back to her apartment and she strips off random items of clothing heading to the shower. Kakashi sits on her roof for a little while taking in what he's learned; she must be happiest alone.

Why? Can't answer that one yet.

Could she be happy alone with him? Can't answer that yet either.

Why _isn't_ she happy with Team 7 anymore? Still can't answer.

_Shit, what can I answer? Hmm..._

She does enjoy training,

A top medic, therefore she must derive a certain pleasure from her work to be so successful,

There is no obvious reason for her to hide away, not ugly, unskilled, stupid, so why? _More questions I _can't_ answer. _

Kakashi finds his feet and leaps away, just in case she _did_ sense his presence he mentally makes a note to keep well enough away for the next day or two, binoculars were invented for a reason after all. Besides in two days, Team 7 will be holding a training session and she _will_ be attending.

_Duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, duck, Golden smiley goose!_

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><p>[1] Just is case you've never heard of this game (or this name for it) its a children's game where everybody sits in a large circle and one (who didn't have a seat to begin with) walks around the circle patting each person on the head saying 'duck', when the person chooses, they can pat one person on the head and exclaim 'goose'. In response to this, the person labelled 'goose' must get up and chase the person who patted them once around the circle, if the chased gets back to the free spot before being caught then they are allowed to sit down and the 'goose' then begins around the circle in the same manner as the first.<p> 


	5. Chapter 5

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_5. Would You Say If I Was Wasting My Time?_

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><p>Even Kakashi was panting by the end of the training session (Sakura attended, like he <em>knew<em> she would), Naruto and Sai had double-teamed to fight him; he was eventually beaten by the now, quite remarkable teamwork that the Jinchuuriki and former root ANBU had forged. Although they were still at each others throats, it provided Naruto with an outlet for his rivalry that had been lost along with Sasuke, although the blonde wouldn't accept anyone even suggesting it. Sai had almost, _almost_ managed a polite sentence every now and then but they were few and far between.

Sakura had trained alone throughout the entire session, Naruto was far too wrapped up with Sai and when Kakashi had made a move to ask Sakura to spar with him, Naruto demanded his attention. Kakashi had intentionally held back in fighting the blonde and dark haired duo so that he'd have enough left in him to fight Sakura afterwards. It took a lot of prodding and goading (in Naruto's case whining and in Sai's insults) before she agreed, but in the end she had – and Kakashi was, for the first time with the Kuniochi, taken completely by surprise.

The only thing which saved Kakashi's hide was the fact he had close to a decade and a half's worth of experience on her.

Even then he could sense some reservation in her, like she was holding something back – she didn't really want to be there – and so fought as hard as her pride dictated but not hard enough to remain there whilst they both slowly whittled at their chakra, stamina and strength. He suspected that she allowed him to win the way he did simply because she wanted no more of the fight. He could see it in her eyes and smile, this time; she was an established Kuniochi, by the means that whatever she did and said was precisely what she meant to – and strangely, it wasn't half as gratifying to Kakashi as it should have been. He'd always thought he have nothing but a sense of pride and smile on his face and his students reached that level, but instead he felt a little dismayed and almost... disenchanted.

Maybe, _probably_ because he had nothing to do with her reaching that point.

"Ano-san, Ano-san, let's go get some ramen!" The already gleeful voice at the thought of lunch, of Naruto's cut through the thoughtful tension,

"Hmm... It is, roughly time for another meal, I think I will join you," Sai immediately agreed,

"Kakashi-sensei? Sakura-chan? Are you coming too?"

"Hmm... I think I will, Sakura-chan?" Kakashi fixed his eye upon her, she flicked her eyes towards him in acknowledgement that she knew he was staring at her, but she didn't meet his gaze,

"No, I have things to do, I'll see you guys around-" Kakashi silenced her with clamping a hand around her wrist, he applied just enough pressure to prevent her slipping away,

"C'mon Sakura-chan, just one bowl of ramen..." She flashed him a(_n obviously fake_) smile and tugged back on her wrist but he didn't relinquish it,

"Kakashi, I..."

"Just one bowl, besides there's something I want to talk to you about," He flashed her one of his own smiles – one which held an element of authenticity, he was telling the truth after all; she shook her head but Kakashi began walking away, pulling her along beside him.

"Yea! Sakura-chan! We haven't eaten ramen together for ages!" She looked as though she wanted to smack Naruto into next week for his obliviousness that it seemed not to be her choice if she were there or not. They found themselves at Ichiraku's very quickly, with Kakashi at the end and Sakura next to him with Naruto then Sai, neither Kakashi nor Sakura ordered anything but it didn't seem to raise many questions. Naruto was far too busy being teased by Sai to which he swiftly responded with shouting various insults or defensive statements. Kakashi only let go of Sakura's wrist, it was so small in his large hand and he was careful to wrap his fingers around to rest on its inside – allowing him to measure her pulse; it evidently jumped as he'd grabbed her, but remained constant afterwards.

"Sakura, what have you been up to, recently?" Kakashi spoke over the top of his book, his attention focussed solely on the Kuniochi beside him, she gave nothing away, with her elbows resting on the table and her chin on her clasped hands,

"The usual, hospital shifts, missions, training,"

"And yet none of those with us," Kakashi allowed a trace of humour to seep into his voice, in the hopes that it would be swallowed a little easier and there for responded to,

"...Hmm, well you seem to be fine without me," She flashed her eyes over to him, giving him a tiny twitch of the lips that was so small, it was actually a little difficult to tell if it was fake – but it _had_ to be,

"Yes, we're only '_fine'_ because one-fourth of the team is missing," He spoke quietly, not quite loud enough for Naruto to hear, but he chose that moment to pipe up anyway,

"Sakura-chan, Sakura-chan, I've had it with Sai! You think I'm manly, right? Right?" Sakura looked slowly over to the blonde, his face contorted in rage (and minor worry);

"I'm sure, Naruto... But I really must be going, see you," She rose to her feet, as

"What's wrong, Sakura-chan? Why're you leaving so early? Why haven't you eaten? I hardly ever see you, Sakura-chan!" Although his voice was whining, his words were well meant and Kakashi heartily agreed that pink seem to appear far too rarely in their lives now a-days.

"Well, you're very healthy Naruto – apart from all the ramen – and you heal fast, so you wouldn't see me all that much," She raised a hand as though it somehow validated her words as she stepped away, "Goodbye," She turned and quickly disappeared,

"Eh? Kakashi-sensei, I don't understand!" Kakashi ignored him as he quickly disappeared in a cloud of smoke, to trail the Kuniochi.

_Sakura, do you really not feel a part of the team any more? _

Perhaps she needed to be reminded of why teammates exist in the first place... they could be helping her with what ever it is that's got her down recently. But instead, she meets even Naruto with cold indifference not caring that her teammates are worried. Kakashi couldn't understand it and it only raised more questions – she took care of the blonde when he wasn't able to for himself whilst he searched and fought frantically against Sasuke. Sakura always made sure what they stayed together, never allowed Naruto and Sasuke to tear each other and the team apart.

So why doesn't she give a damn now? Is she facing something which is making her push away her team?

Whatever it may be first things first: Sakura needs to rejoin the team and be made to see that it isn't right with her pulled away from them.


	6. Chapter 6

Damn, this is turning into just one story with many short chapters... Hmm... Well, if this trend continues (and I can't find a way to return the chapters after this little bit into more of a stand-alone one-shot format (although still generally connected, but not so much as to necessitate reading in all together or in chronological order) I might just make the chapters longer and pad the story out a little: do you guys have any thoughts / feelings on this? Would you rather a more stand-alone feel to the chapters or have them longer and more interconnected / story-like? Please let me know, I'll be doing one or the other anyway, but if you have a strong feelings then please voice them!

Also: thank you everybody who's taken the time to review! I'm really glad that this story is receiving such a warm reception! :D

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_6. An Obsession He Didn't Realize_

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><p>Kakashi had managed to force Sakura to attend every Team 7 training session for a week straight but she was, unfortunately, no more sociable. He even managed to drag her (literally) to another ramen based lunch but she spoke just as little and she was just as cold and indifferent to her teammates – covered by an excellent mask but Kakashi could easily see through it.<p>

He did his best to try to force Sakura to open up a little and feel herself a part of the team again but she stubbornly refused – to the point of not even bothering to put up her typical kindly façade any longer. Naruto – although he'd noticed Sakura was around a little more – hadn't quite noticed at how Sakura was _really_ acting; the boy always had been a little dense, but Kakashi really had expected him to notice something.

In the end, Kakashi organised a training exercise much like the one they first held together: Naruto, Sakura and Sai were to team up together and go all out against Kakashi himself – he was, at first tempted to have himself and Sakura team up but the cynic in him knew that Naruto would only go for himself. The boy would mean well, but he'd see Kakashi as the more obvious opponent as well as his own innate soft spot for Sakura would mean that he couldn't bring himself to go for her with full force.

He waited them out for quite a while as well as snuck up to observe their teamwork; the exercise wasn't so much about fighting skills as rather one for observational and sneaking skills – for Kakashi anyway – it afforded him an insight, not only to Sakura's ability _in general_ to work in a team but also her ability to work in _her_ team, _their_ team. Naruto and Sai still did most of the talking (and therefore arguing) whilst Sakura remained... Hmm...

On the outside looking in.

She merely sat there, looking suspiciously 'sort of' like she was listening, although Kakashi could imagine that her head was, in actually, far away – but _Sakura-chan_ wouldn't do that, would she? He retreated for the time being and allowed them to come to him. He'd soon see what was happening; Naruto, naturally, appeared first followed up by some of Sai's ink tigers which both proved a formidable approach to an enemy – as Naruto occupied an enemies hands (at least) the tigers swooped in to take advantage of the openings afforded.

It would have worked too, if Kakashi were a lesser opponent – but he was too fast – although almost not fast enough to avoid befalling the trap. Sakura appeared to have pre-empted his move backwards and struck her chakra-charged fist to the ground just as he was mere milliseconds from landing – preventing him from either leaping away or gaining solid footing. Naruto jumped immediately in after Kakashi and eventually the trio won the match and silver-hair was confused.

Why, _how_ could look so distant and disinterested whilst Sai and Naruto were discussing the plan, and yet have _perfect_ timing mid-battle? Kakashi was at a loss.

"Alright! We won! Who's for celebratory ramen?" Kakashi freed himself, ignoring Naruto as he kept his eye subtly but unfalteringly on the Kuniochi, she busied herself with stripping off her gloves and replacing them in her pouch; she brushed a little dust of her shoulder. She gave a tiny peek at the three males none of whom were obviously paying attention and she darted off.

"I'll see you guys on Monday for our next training session,"

"Yosh!" Naruto replied, "What about you, Sakura-chan? Hey, where is she?"

"I think she had an errand to run... I do too, see ya!" He grinned and disappeared in a puff of smoke, reappearing on a rooftop just in time to see Sakura disappear around a corner, he followed swiftly, even if his ribs were hurting a touch from the excessive for Naruto used.

He waited exactly seven minutes before he appeared at one of her windows; she was sat on her futon looking thoughtful, _pensive_ even,

"Sakura, may I come in?" She paused, which sounded suspiciously like the space of one cynical sentence but answered,

"Alright," He stepped down, leaping nimbly over a second small, folded futon which acted like a sofa, he toed off his sandals too – it was a helpful display, no only did he not like wearing shoes in his own home, but it gave a clear message that he wasn't in a hurry to leave. She finally raised her gaze to meet his, it was completely passive, trying to give the impression she was open and listening but Kakashi only saw the emptiness which comes with having forsaken one's teammates. He stood with his hands in his pockets for a moment, regarding her,

"Can I help you, Kakashi? You movement was a bit laboured, did Naruto hit you too hard?" Almost caught off guard by her perceptiveness, he chose to remain silent for the moment as she searched him intently for any sign of validation or denial of her claim,

"That isn't why I'm here,"

"Oh?" _Too innocent._

"Sakura, why have you been avoiding Naruto, Sai and I?" Her eyebrow twitched slightly, but her expression continued to display overall curiosity,

"How so? You've forced me to practice every session this week,"

"Exactly. I shouldn't have to be forcing you,"

"The hospital keeps me very busy, well, it _was_ but it seems my hours have been mysteriously cut down – which happened to _conveniently_ fit in with your training times."

"There wasn't a problem before,"

"Really? When did I stop attending practice?" _...shit. _She had him there,

"...I don't remember,"

"Exactly; it was over three and a half years ago, Kakashi," He had to forcibly restrain his eye from widening with the surprise,

"Your team are your family, Sakura, you should have let us know," She rolled her eyes, he'd been expecting an: 'I did tell you!', _suspicious_, "We could be helping you with whatever it is that's going on with you right now, but you've only pushed us away... Even if you'd been too busy to train with us, surely you could have found the odd _lunch_ to spend with us," He noted how her eyes nearly imperceptibly narrowed at the first of his statement, but she was swift to respond;

"Why? Naruto had his thing with Sai, he'll never admit it, but it's important to him... I have a lot of work to do in general and me coming at sitting next to two people deeply engaged in conversation, isn't my idea of a relaxing lunch break," It was Kakashi's turn to narrow his eye,

"He's worried about you, he misses you,"

"... I miss him too... occasionally, and it was good to work with him again today,"

"It didn't look like you were listening to him form the plan... If I didn't know better I'd say you were a million miles away,"

"And yet my timing was perfect," She flashed a broad smile but it was so fake and empty Kakashi involuntarily gritted his teeth,

"Sakura... Your teammates are _not_ commodities to pick up and drop when you feel like it; you must be there for them... Yet all I see is you working with them – exceptionally well, I will admit, but you're not _socializing_ with them. You've known Naruto, been his teammate since you were what, thirteen?"

"Twelve,"

"Exactly, where's the friendship?"

"He has that with Sai," Kakashi couldn't contain his sigh, as he momentarily averted his eye in frustration, his mind working on another way to tackle the problem,

"Kakashi," He looked up at her, "Have you spoken about this to Naruto or... well, I wouldn't expect you to have spoken to Sai, actually," Kakashi cocked his head for a spilt second as he considered her words,

"...No..."

"Why not? If surely they also hold some 'blame' here, if you want to go that far," She rose to her feet and walked past him over to her little kitchenette, "They haven't exactly been snapping me back into the fold, have they?" Kakashi didn't have an immediate response; he could hear her fiddling around boiling water, presumably for tea,

"I came to you because _you're_ the one who removed herself from the team first," She scoffed so hard, she nearly choked on her own spit,

"Funny, have you told that joke to Sasuke, yet?" He had to forcibly resist the urge to try shaking some sense into her, it probably wouldn't be as half as productive as it would be working some of his irritation out; "Besides, you always did have the worst excuses,"

"Excuse me?"

"You're only coming to _me_ about this because I was always the one you didn't have to haul into line, I was quiet and did as I was told; you could count on me to be so typically '_that_' that I think it unnerves you I'm not the little girl you remember,"

"That isn't true."

"Of course it is!" She poured out water into two cups, Kakashi was surprised to see, "You always assumed I'd be the corner stone that never changed; Naruto has Sai at the moment and its those two who need the camaraderie to work together effectively," She handed him one as she went back to sit on her futon laid out as a bed, but closer to the little coffee table she had near it.

"That is true, but you cannot be an effective team if you don't include yourself socially as well,"

"So is that what you do? You go out and have lunch or a few drinks with everybody who's assigned to your team?"

"Of course not," Kakashi wasn't expecting to get cornered like this – it was an easy in/out mission he should b on his way home already. "But they're your _first_ team and they know you best,"

"They don't know me at all. You're just obsessed, Kakashi, because of what happened to _your_ first team you're too scared to see what's really happening, I no longer fit in with Sai and Naruto and my schedule doesn't allow for us to work together anymore anyway. Naruto will always be my friend, but next to Sai he's a stranger – haven't you noticed how they never _attempted_ to include me? _They're_ the team, Kakashi, _not_ Sai, Naruto and me. It's almost funny – I always thought that it would be either Naruto or I who's be suffering with the team's dissolution – but never would I have thought _you'd_ be the one so upset." She took a sip of tea – flashing him again a fake smile so ugly the cup threatened the shatter in his grasp.

"Sakura I-"

"I know you never got a chance to realize this, but it is _natural_ for the first _Genin teams_ to spilt up after they become Chuunin – and we're _Jounin_ now, it was high time we went our separate ways. It was upsetting at first, but you quickly get used to it;" She sipped her tea and walked over to him, "Now, take your vest and shirt off,"

"W-what?" _Almost off guard again_,

"Your ribs are hurting, right? I want to see if they're bruised," 'Sakura' off, 'Medical personnel' on, and not even close to the underlying problem.

Well, _shit..._

_ I fucked up that serving, didn't I? Missed my own pass..._


	7. Chapter 7

Ok, in lieu of my message in the previous chapter, I think I might well keep these as short but inter-connected one-shots (although still looking for too much like on continuous story) oh well, I'll assume that you guys don't mind too much!

Also, sorry for the delay in posting this chapter I had major (end-of-the-universe-sort) of technical problems yesterday and I though that I'd lost absolutely everything, but luckily I managed to retrieve it all! So I'll try and make this post 1 of 2 for today :D

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_7. It Was In Your Eyes_

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><p>Although Kakashi had initially turned up at Sakura's apartment to try to reintegrate her into the Team (it really <em>isn't<em> the same without her) and hopefully then gain an opportunity to figure out what is really bothering her – whatever it is making her feel the need to use fake smiles and look like a puppet. However, he ran into a minor snag in that he hadn't expected: Sakura's backbone seems to be made of steel (although he really shouldn't have underestimated her) and instead of even getting close to seeing the seams of her mask, she fought back.

So he is currently almost naked from the waist up, lying face down on her futon with Sakura's hands firmly but gently working the muscles – he's somehow missed how tense he's been over the past week or so.

He isn't sure how she managed to wheedle him into taking off his flak jacket, and shirt (thankfully he'd made use of the separate mask today) and then get him onto her bed. He trusts Sakura, but when she motioned for him lie down (he'd already been forced to strip so that she could examine his ribs; one, it turned out, had a very minor crack, although hurt like hell) he was surprised at his own hesitation.

Being naked in general wasn't really his cup of tea (unless of course the female his was with was getting equally naked) and Sakura's recent bout of spuriousness meant that he wasn't quite sure how to respond. He was unable to say any of this to her, of course, so lay down; Kakashi, being surrounded by her scent as well as being half naked and touched in what was a healing – but also very sensual fashion is proving a difficult juxtaposition.

His body is trusting Sakura implicitly, it relaxes under her touch as he could feel all of the tension leaving him, he knows he isn't able to find his feet right now, even if he wants to. His mind, however, is a little more on guard, it's wary of how professional Sakura seems, her touches – although extremely pleasurable – are business, he could somehow sense her detachment from her actions and how clearly she is helping a patient with tense musculature.

Kakashi wants to ask her any number of questions but he can sense that she would merely avoid them, if not deny his claims; his body is slowly getting less responsive to him but more responsive to her; he can't seem to bring his muscles to move unless she massages them. His tension draining slowly as he couldn't help but allow his mind to wander slightly over the woman wholesomely pleasuring him – he's so unused to being touched in such a fashion which he not only willingly submitted to (occasionally forced to under go as a result of muscle atrophy due to coma induced by Sharingan over use) but isn't a form of foreplay (which again only happened once and it wasn't something he could relax into, his body already too heightened for sex).

But this time, his body and mind can do nothing but submit, to her allow her skilled hands to weave over his body, draining his tension as a deep sigh escapes him before he can control it and a breath of laughter escapes Sakura in response;

"I didn't realize you were this tense, Kakashi, I though you were a master at aloofness," Her voice holds a levity he can't match in his current state,

"Hmm... Well the tension has to go somewhere," She begins to press her thumbs either side of his spine, working up from the very bottom of his back forcing another sigh from his lips – he fancies he can sense her smirk,

"Apparently it does... When was the last time you worked the tension free of your body?"

"W-_what_?" Was the best he was able to choke out, a large number of different connotations of what the _hell_ she possibly could mean by her question running through his head;

"When was the last time you had a massage? Or did any cool-down stretches from training? You may feel fine after strenuous exercise but your muscles tell a different story... I highly recommend that you get a massage weekly, when possible or at the very least take the time to properly cool down and stretch _after_ as well as before each training session – the amount that Tsunade-shishou sends you out on high ranking missions and then all your hoo-ha and fussing about our team training sessions means that you never give your body a break – hence your all knotted up like this." Somehow, Kakashi manages to register her words properly as she spoke, although her digging elbow in his upper back was doing a good job o scattering his thoughts,

"Is that an offer, Sakura?" She seems to groan in irritation at his presumption, "Please? Not even for your ailing old sensei who doesn't even get a chance to train with you any longer?" Apparently the _'helpless sensei_' persona works; have to keep that speck of knowledge carefully stored;

"Only if you're just back from a high class mission and have _already_ seen a medic to tend to your injuries," She, at the same time, gave a particularly rough jerk of her elbow, as though to prove her point,

"Ah, fine, fine... But you will give me a massage, right?" He checks just as he can feel the balls of her hands digging into a group of muscles which he finds particularly prone to knotting,

"Haa..." She sighed heavily, as though knowing that he will take full advantage of the service offered – with such an amazing massage, how could he possibly refuse? "Yes... I suppose I will," _Excellent, that also means I have a perfect excuse to try and figure out precisely what's bothering you – although I'll have to be a lot more subtle than I was about the teamwork..._

"Ok, there you go..." She rises to her feet and walks a few steps away from him to pick up her small cup of tea and took a sip, "Remember to stretch after training sessions..." She sighs a little as Kakashi eventually manages to feel his bones again so that he can sit up and replace his shirt, not obviously moving for the moment as he arranges himself in a comfortable sitting position,

"What are you doing?"  
>"I still have my tea to finish, Sakura-chan... Besides that massage was so good that I might be an easy target so I think its better I wait here until I have recovered," He grins broadly, glad that he's finally making a breakthrough – apparently Sakura-<em>chan<em> lets her guard down for the helpless or silly sensei; she won't be difficult to break down.

"Recover? Kakashi, it was a massage,"

"Yes, a really _good_ massage, besides I still have tea to drink, don't I?" She rolls her eyes as he takes the opportunity to swipe a swig of tea, regretting slightly how cold it is; "Do you often give massages?" Sakura averts her eyes back up to him, they're wide, holding the question: _genuine though still not quite a smile, at least I can be sure there's a real person in there somewhere. _

"Sometimes... Although I typically deal mostly with emergencies, so I don't half as much as the nurses or lower ranked medics but if I have a coma patient for example, then I have to so as to prevent muscular atrophy." Kakashi nods, he's been in hospital far too many times for his own liking and as a result has gotten to know most of the medical terms at least associated with him;

"How's your back feeling now?" He replaces his cup back onto the small coffee table as he sticks out his elbows and rolls his shoulders, twisting to the side slightly,

"Infinitely better than in has done for the last few weeks," He thinks a semi-subtle compliment will work well in his favour – he needs Sakura to relax herself if he's ever to get answers although his game is steadily getting more dangerous but much more fun now that he was _tangibly _closer to what he's craving.

_Your faking days are numbered, Sakura...And I'm damned if I'm not going to earn a real smile, at least, from you sooner rather than later..._


	8. Chapter 8

Ok, update 2 for the day! (Please don't start expecting two updates for this everyday, its really only a little side project for when I need a break from _Fascination: Sequel_ and at the same time feed my KakaSaku addiction, it's gotta be bad for my heath by now!) I will still try to get at least one chapter out per day (as they're only little and take no more than an hour or so) and I'll try and get more _Fascination: Sequel_ chapters out soon too!

Thanks for all your support guys!_  
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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_8. When You Can Feel it all Around You But its Something You Just Can't Touch _

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><p>Kakashi has been busy, although he was immediately sent out on an A class mission after his – rather delightful – massage from Sakura, it worked in his favour. He isn't badly injured at present; although he's managed to sprain his wrist a little, it was nothing serious but just enough for him to warrant seeing a medic. Usually he'd do nothing of the sort, but <em>this<em> occasion, he has the opportunity to set a precedent which would allow him not only to see Sakura more often (under said 'silly' pretext) but it _also_ provides him with a means to slowly worm his way into Sakura's life. Again, this was the sort of thing which would probably drive him to murder were another to do it to him, but Sakura has caught his interest and he is determined not only to find what the problem is but also to get an idea of exactly where the seams of her mask lie.

He knew that as soon as he rips it off, her fists of fury would no doubt be quicker than he did he not have a pre-prepared escape route.

He nips carefully towards her apartment, deciding that perhaps this time, approaching her from a more anticipated angle may find her in a more agreeable and unguarded mood. He climbs the many steps, suppressing his chakra whilst keeping his senses open wide for hers – _thank Kami-sama she's in_, he knocks a few times, praying that her weakness for his asinine-sensei is as strong as he suspects – hence she won't deny him entry allowing the pattern to be dyed. It doesn't take long for her to answer – she looks him up and down as though he were a shifty stranger;

"Hi! Are you busy at the moment?" He offers his best (and most practiced) goofy-sensei smile, her suspicion doesn't change,

"You want a massage, don't you?" His grin doesn't falter,

"Mou, Sakura-chan, that's not fair, I want you to heal my wrist as well," She sighs and slaps a hand to her forehead,

"I told you I would give you a massage if you'd _already_ seen a medic," Her expression displays irritation to Kakashi's eye, but he can see something else underneath, a... sadness that she's covering over, he risks a direct question,

"Sakura... Is something wrong? You look a little... _disturbed_," She's an expert, he realizes, as though she's already anticipated every move he could make and hence nothing fazes her – even if he seems to have seen underneath her disguise.

_Has she already predicted my desire – and doubtless, eventual success – in seeing underneath _that_ underneath as well?_

Her expression doesn't change,

"No, I'm fine and if you need that wrist treated, then you'll have to go the hospital,"

"But Sakura... You can't do this little favour for me?"

"If I treat you here and now, you'll be here for every little – and major – thing and I'll never get any peace... I agreed to give you a massage every now and then to help with your muscles because of your value to this village. I did _not_ massage you then because I'm starting to miss my old team or any of that crap – I did so because as a medic, I can see when you're injured and you were heading to injury fast with all that tension." He doesn't like her blasé rejection of everything he stands for;

"So you won't want it to happen again, right? You can just forget about the wrist and massage me now... I'll get it sorted later,"

"The hell you will... Kakashi, go and find a medic right now; I'm heading out for a training session for a few hours, when I'm done, I head over to your apartment then, alright?" _Damn, she really is one step ahead, but it only takes one falter..._

"You know, if you'd just heal me now, then we could train together,"  
>"I don't want to train with anyone else,"<p>

"Why not? I could help you with targeting a moving target and all," A single, slender pink eyebrow rose, expertly feigning thinking about it;

Such a beautiful challenge.

"Sorry, no; I have a training regime that I'm happy with, thank you," Kakashi cocked his head eyeing her carefully, giving her no option but to be under his scrutiny;

"What if by the time that I've gotten my wrist healed and you're still training, we'll train together?" He spoke as though she'd been pleading to train with him; apparently it isn't accepted well,

"Kakashi, go and find another, free medic and get your wrist healed, I will find you at your apartment after my training, in a few hours," He doesn't want to give in and he knows just how easy it would be to follow her but he also knows that if he pushes too hard, he'll loose the opportunity he's vying for;

"Fine... I'll wait for you in my apartment," She smiles at him but its so _fake(!)_ that his entire body tenses – she'll have her work cut out just to correct the knots that that _fake(!)_ smile has created – but he forces it aside, "...Thank you, Sakura," She nods again as Kakashi rises a half seal to his chest to disappear in a puff of smoke – he has to prepare.

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><p>Kakashi has been working hard – <em>again<em> – he's been planning and preparing ever since he thanked Sakura, for when she shows up; he is determined to at least get her to drop her guard, even for a moment, is the task for this evening. He'll keep her here for as long as it takes, he only needs a moment, a _moment_ of her in a relaxed state and he'll be satisfied. For the time being.

Their exchange outside her apartment earlier worried him she was both so guarded and prepared for everything that he's almost worried he won't be able to use the advantage that comes with being in his own home. No doubt she'll have some trick with which to slip past him and deal only with what she's been requested for; he doubts that any of the typical tactics will work and he's not yet desperate enough to use outlandish ones. As he lays on his bed thinking, a sudden realization almost makes his blood run cold.

All those weeks ago when she'd treated him and he'd believed that it was _Sakura_ treating him, when he realized how comfortable he was with her, he was only comfortable with the 'medic'.

It wasn't Sakura at all, it was just her expert persona that he'd been comfortable with, how in the _hell_ had he missed it? No wonder her transformation seemed to sudden and inexplicable – because right up until he saw her in the Jounin lounge that time, he _hadn't noticed_ that her persona was permanently in tact. But why had he only noticed then?

Was it the first time he'd been in full health _and_ seen her up close without actually interacting with her? It must have been; Sakura's mask was of far better craftsmanship that he'd expected – she kept out-anticipating him and Kakashi was loosing his own challenge. But no matter how elusive she is this time, he _will_ find a way to get her to drop her guard – even if it is going against his own teachings – but then again, he supposes that he wasn't ever really her teacher. He may have held it in name, but he doubted that he taught her all that much.

As elusive as she is, he will simply have to build a more complex net.


	9. Chapter 9

Yes, the title is a lyric from _In The Air Tonight_ by Phil Collins as well, lol I just really thought that this fitted!

Also: I hope you guys don't mind too much all of the reflective and internal monologue what-not of Kakashi over actual speech – I'm trying to include more dialogue as I go, but I think the reflection is important for Kakashi's character; I hope it's not grating on you, or becoming too repetitive!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_9. I've Seen Your Face Before, My Friend, But I Don't Know If You Know Who I Am_

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><p>He's perhaps a little <em>too<em> quick to answer the door, but he sees no reason to dawdle, he pulls open the door, his haitai-ate and flak-jacket are already off – he sees no real reason to wear them in his own home. He hopes that it will also offer a sense of calmness and informality which _may_ help to bring her down from her own guarded state, but Kakashi is already aware that she's far too good for that – he's working on a paranoid S ranked target. He smiles – more as a welcoming gesture – but immediately regrets it when she offers back that _disgusting fake(!),_ he stands aside and she walks in, her manner strangely diminutive.

"Sakura, your hair's wet..." He allows carefully measured and weighted concern to bleed into his voice,  
>"Hmm? Oh, I didn't want to keep you waiting, I already took longer training than I intended to," She looked sheepish – <em>clever girl, if you're on the defensive or embarrassed, then it's not only easier for you to keep your guard up but it also gives you excellent reason to keep it up... Is that your game? <em>

"I didn't mean for you to rush Sakura, I had nothing else planned today... And you know that I would never interrupt your training," He allows the levity to return to his voice; she gives a small twitch to her lips but it's too subtle for Kakashi to tell if it's genuine or fake.

"Well, we might as well get started,"

"Would you like anything to drink? Tea?" She shakes her head,

"No thanks; please take off your shirt and trousers and lie down," He nods and lifts his shirt over his head, leaving his mask in place and then pauses for a moment; Sakura seems to sense his hesitation and explains further, "If your back is as stiff as it looks from the way you removed your shirt, then I'm betting that your legs aren't fairing too well either," Kakashi accepts and tugs down his trousers, deciding to ignore her apparent discontinuity.  
>"Are you in a rush somewhere, Sakura?" She meets his one eye as she drops his clothes over the back of his chair,<p>

"...No, not really," He nods as he positions himself face down on his bed, leaving enough space for her – it occurs to him that he's suddenly very comfortable, even now almost naked, with her. Her hands are warm as they find their way to his back, her weight barely dipping the bed next to him,  
>"You are so tense... Kakashi what <em>have<em> you been doing to yourself?" _Worrying about you!_

"Well, the last mission was a bit more strenuous than I anticipated,"

"It's not like you to underestimate an enemy," _Talkative is good,_

"Hmm, perhaps not..." _And, apparently, to underestimate 'friends'_, her hands grow a little heavier as they roam over his shoulders,

"Kakashi, I really can't stress this enough: you have to start freeing some of this tension yourself or you'll end up with some serious strains and possibly out of commission for weeks if you keep up these levels – I bet you haven't once warmed down since I saw you last," He can hear the 'concerned medic' in her, but its no where near enough;

"You have so little faith in me Sakura-chan, at least I'm seeking treatment one way or another," She sighs tiredly, as her hands move again down either side of his spine,

"These massages are only an aid, Kakashi, they can't possibly take the place of cool-down exercises which are a _preventative_ measure. I know you're not a medic, but you're not stupid either – it's worthless to treat the symptoms instead of the cause."

Kakashi nods as a thought strikes him: is he reading Sakura's symptoms properly? Is he reacting to her _symptoms_ instead of the _cause_?

Maybe he needs greater patience, maybe he's rushing the process and he needs more time simply to observe and not criticise Sakura or try to change her behaviour too quickly. For him to appear in her life again and start acting like the sensei he never was to her, now, by judging Sakura and her behaviour to find them unworthy will get him nowhere.

Its time for him to earn the _trust_ of Sakura and that means that he must first become her _friend_ – it's both the cause and the saviour of this problem that he never really got to know her: he can become whatever she desires from a friend.

She finishes the massage as leaned back, wringing her hands slightly as Kakashi again takes a few minutes to figure out where his bones are and if he can control them, he eventually sits up as Sakura is about to tug on her sandals;

"Wait, Sakura, will you stay for dinner?" She froze as Kakashi was buttoning his trousers again, he picks up his shirt as she turns to face him,  
>"What?"<p>

"Dinner, you'll stay, won't you?" Sakura looks as though she has absolutely no idea how to appropriately answer his questions – _another positive, genuine step_;

"Uh, I- I shouldn't intrude on you, I only came here to massage you, you don't have to put yourself out." It sounds so much like genuine concern, but Kakashi is more cynical than he's been for a while,

"I know it may not mean much to you as just part of your medical role, but it means something to me and I want to thank you, Sakura," She eyes him with suspicion above all else – although he can't blame her – if their roles were reversed, he'd probably be suspicious too;

"... I don't know..."

"It's something easy, please?" She frowns slightly

"...Well, if you're sure..."

"Of course I am!" He makes sure to grin, "Sakura, I know that I may well feel like a stranger to you, but not only were you once my long-ago student, but you appear now to be my masseuse and that isn't something I can take for granted," He assumes that honesty is the best policy. He assumes correctly as she allows her sandal to drop back to the floor and pulls off her other sandal; she soon follows him whilst he walks over to his little kitchenette, "Are you happy with pork medallions, mixed vegetables and noodles?"

"Sure," She responds – her uncertainty clear in her voice,

"Take a seat," He gestures behind him to the diminutive table, whilst he peers into the fridge to retrieve the meat, vegetables and two beers, "Would you like a drink?" He makes sure to keep his smile (what she can yet see of it) passive and completely open,

"Sure," She smiles again and its so _damn fake_ he wishes he could point it out and make her get rid of it. He opts instead for questions close, but still extrinsic from themselves, _personally_.

"It's been so long that I'm not sure what you're up to date with, but I guess that you know how many S and A ranked missions Naruto is doing at the moment," His back is turned, but he could sense the "smile" in her voice,

"Yes I have heard about it... Tsunade-shishou is glad she didn't make a formal bet on him," Kakashi doesn't need to force the laugh which escapes him,

"I can imagine so... Somehow, though, I'm still struggling to truly see him as Hokage... I really thought they'd force me into to it before that," He places a beer and a glass down onto the table in front of her and remains to observe her for a moment,

"I thought they'd do that too, from what I heard you were about a second away from being Hokage way back after Pein attacked Konoha so I thought that you'd be the automatic choice after Tsunade-shishou but apparently she has more staying power than I gave her credit for," Kakashi turns away inexplicably to take a drink but just as soon turns back to face her, his arms folded over his chest his single open eye continuously studying the young woman in front of him;

"Apparently she does... I'm grateful, in a way, I never wanted the Hokage position and I think Naruto will do a lot of good for the village – I trust him now to be serious when he needs to be, at least," Sakura nods as she takes a sip of beer – Kakashi can't tell if its really _Sakura_ sat in front of him or another, but he finds it hard to believe that she ends up in this situation all that often.

The benefit of the doubt, this time, seems worth his while.

They talk for a while and all throughout dinner, Kakashi is no closer to deciphering whether Sakura is a truth-teller or a fortune-teller but he still marks it as progress. She speaks easily about such a range of topics that Kakashi almost finds himself off guard having not had such an informed talking-partner for quite some time. He can still see a stranger in the seat who merely _looks_ like someone he thinks he knows but his intuition tells him it's a stranger.

But she's suddenly a stranger who isn't quite so intangible – _Sakura_ is real.

Sakura-_chan_ is what he's not quite so sure about.

It's changeable, of course;

"...Sakura...May I make a request of you?" He speaks plainly, meeting her gaze as swiftly as he can make look natural;

"I don't know, what is it?" Her eyebrows are crinkled into a frown he might find endearing – the circumstances not being what they are;

"I would like to train with you once a week... It only needs to be for a few hours when you have the time and it can be as part of Team 7 or just with me," She's literally motionless for a few moments – _an honest consideration?_

"...I don't know..."

"What's stopping you?" Her eyes immediately avert back to her plate as she takes another drink;

"Hmm, nothing I suppose..."

"Will you at least train with me next week? Whenever you're free, so long as I'm not on a mission – which I'm sure won't be until the end of the week I'm sure, and if, after then, you really don't want to train together, then I won't force you," He keeps his tone even and noncommittal, she looks so uncertain that Kakashi's is very nearly fooled into thinking its genuine – _have I been so poisoned against her already?_

"Hmm... I suppose so... What about Thursday? My shift ends at twelve... So maybe we could meet at one?" Her voice is tentative, he smiles,

"Of course, I'll do my best to keep that day free," She offers a restrained smile which looks fake but doesn't sicken him quite so much; Sakura opens her mouth to say something, but closes it quickly, "Hmm?"

"Nothing, I'm sure you'll be late anyway," For the first time, at least in recent weeks, Kakashi is unable to resist a genuine laugh.


	10. Chapter 10

Don't expect the obvious change between this chapter and all the others to be regular - I'm hoping that it will be sporadic at best!

To everyone who's reviewed, favourited and put this on story alert - it's all very flattering, thank you!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_10. The Hurt Doesn't Show but the Pain Still Grows_

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><p>Sakura sighs, she sits at her desk in her office – it's small and only accommodates her chair and desk, the rest of the space being eaten up by patient files and reports – but it's her office alone and offers privacy when she needs it. Her eyes roam over the open file under her hunched over form, her brain is busy trying to reorganize Kakashi's 'file' in her head. It was so simple when he was as oblivious as Naruto to her growing distance and disillusionment <em>when did he notice? How did he?<em> She wishes that she could pin point precisely when he suddenly decided to take an interest and force her to allow him into her life. _Did he think he had an automatic right due to our history? _Sakura has no idea but they're dancing such an irritatingly slow waltz and he took the lead before she was able to figure out his motive. She's since forced them back onto equal footing and is more than able to pre-empt his moves but she underestimated his ability to lay traps.

Sakura knows that Kakashi has her in a very delicate position.

She also knows that Kakashi isn't yet able to see what' really going on – he's dancing blindfolded – but then, he always was good as seeing with only one eye. He's laid the trap which means she has to dance with him at least until the end of the song lest she wants to face his retribution, no doubt by extending their dance to the entire ball room. She's not prepared for that to happen. At least, it seems, that he too underestimated her – it's so clear through his actions that he anticipated a push over – at least she's not the only one on uneven ground. Although it seemed strange that he was as distant and so _Kakashi-sensei-like_ that it was odd: why push so hard to get her to train with him, then, when she did so, he was so aloof?

That Thursday training session was long and productive, he was indeed useful to work on some of her Jutsu accuracy and Genjutsu but he was suddenly so distant that Sakura was nearly caught off guard. He only smiled and acted in a friendly manner when they were preparing to go their separate ways (after she'd forced him to do cool-down exercises). He asked again, of course to train with him the following week, provided he was back from his mission in time. It would be so easy for him to slip right back into the rhythm in her life – he is an expert at getting people to drop their guard and if Sakura isn't careful she'll allow him too close and he'll be in a position to find out everything. It aches, but that's no reason to allow him to get close – he'll only work harder if he can see her weakness.

What does he have to bother at all? She didn't think he was the nosey type. Thank Kami-sama he's been on a mission for just over a week now. It's given her time to think and prepare her response to his no doubt probing questions and actions.

A sudden knock at the door;

"Yes?"

"Haruno-san, it's Shin-san, Renshi-san brought him in, he's just been admitted and the initial report was _poison_," The young woman – four or so years Sakura's junior peeks around the door her long, dark purple hair contrasts with her pale cerise eyes;

"What? Are you certain?" Sakura leaps to her feet as she rushes around the desk over to the younger woman,

"Yes,"

"Do you have their file, Asuka?" She nods, "Good, give it to me, then come with me to get a sample of their blood and take it down to the lab, I'll see to it after I've given him a prelim examination," Sakura slips into medic-mode so easily and quickly that it doesn't take thinking about, she immediately marches down the corridor, instinctively knowing where to go as the younger girl follows; frowning, she hands the file back to Asuka;

"Wait here for me, I'll be out with the sample in a few moments," She nods as the pink haired medic walks into the room, finding one man lying flat on his back and the second leaning against the wall behind the door with his arms folded and sinister bear-like mask securely in place.

"Renshi-san... if you are not injured please step outside, whilst I examine my patient," He doesn't budge, Sakura moves immediately to the patient's side, her hands lifting off his mask and finding their way to his pulse. As she sets about taking a blood sample, Sakura can hear the ANBU moving a little closer to her to watch her actions more easily, she tries to ignore it but occasionally, such things aren't as easy as it seems they should be.

"Renshi-san, you will have to move back to allow me to examine my patient," She can almost hear him scowl,

"I am also here to ensure his safety," She just about manages to avoid wincing at his statement, forcing her face to remain passive whilst she slaps the inside of his elbow, just below the small coil of rubber tubing fitted around his bicep, slowly jabbing the sterile needle into his vein she draws out a small volume of blood. She puts the needle down on the small side table before ripping off one of the rubber gloves as heals the tiny pin-prick; she walks away, pretending not to be bothered by the ANBU's threatening presence;

"Asuka, take this to the lab, give this to one of the Jounin-medics, Sano-san if he's there; tell him to make a note of anything unusual and to find an antidote if possible, I'll be there as quickly as I can," The purple haired medic nodded and scurries away, as Sakura turns back to the room to continue the preliminary examination of her patient; the poison, it seems, is not particularly a serious one – it only works in slowly interfering with basic motor control. Sakura turns to the ANBU next to her,

"If you are adamant about reaming here then you will assist me," He pauses, unmoving, "I need you to hold him down whilst I extract the poison, unless you'd rather he remains paralyzed for the rest of his life?" He eventually moves closer,

"I'd rather that than him dying,"

"There's a higher chance of his dying without the poison extracted, than if I act to remove it now, hold him!" She slices through his shirt with a kunai and removes it completely, she moves a hand to one of the pre-prepared bowls of water, allowing her chakra to gather it together, "Renshi-san I am the medic here and therefore outrank you in this situation, hold him down or get out!" Eventually the ANBU cooperates but it seems he can't resist one last comment,

"It would seem you still haven't earned that seniority if by what happened the last time you pulled that line on me is anything to go on," She could hear the sneer in his voice but she forces her emotions to go elsewhere as she directs the chakra-laden water about her fist down onto her patient's chest.

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><p>Sakura marches down the hall, not caring who has to get out of her way as she heads towards the lab where hopefully an antidote will be sitting, waiting for her to collect and administer so that she can get the hell out of this building just a little bit faster.<p>

"Sano-san?" She made sure that the anger she is feeling was kept well away from her voice whilst she peeks around the door,

"Ah, Sakura-san, I've finished analysing that poison, insidious little thing, but the antidotes was easy enough to create – you can take it to your patient now,"

"Arigatou-gozaimasu, Sano-san," He smiles back and Sakura returns it – he's excels at poisons and antidotes and an amiable man, but like most who work in a hospital, he either can't or doesn't care to distinguish fake from real smiles. She bows, swipes the potion and is soon out of the hospital for good – until her next shift. Sakura takes herself off towards the training ground – it was something she'd been planning on all day, but the arrival of and old..._acquaintance_ and his interference with her work –_the bastard! –_ has put her in a mood so foul no one is stupid enough to question her actions.

She stands stock still for a few moments in a desperate attempt to calm herself but she knows it's futile; directing all of the chakra to her fists she slams it into the ground. Unfortunately she isn't half as gratified by seeing numerous square meters of earth crumble and spilt; charging her fists again a brief thought crosses her mind which, at least, makes her feel a tiny touch better.

_At least Kakashi isn't around to poke his nose into this. If he'd witnessed any of that, I'll never be rid of him!_


	11. Chapter 11

I know that this chapter *might* feel a little like filler, but it is important and I didn't really see any other way around saying / suggesting what needed to be said / suggested, so I hope you can bear with me on this! [I don't think it's _that_ terrible, but definitely not as good as some of the others!]

Cheers!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_11. That Look's Been There For Far Too Long _

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><p>Kakashi had his book out and his one visible eye trained upon the pages as he sauntered down the street next to his once-long-ago student, Sakura. His attention was focussed almost 100% upon her (about 5% had to be devoted to keeping the book upright, turning the page at roughly the right intervals and avoiding collisions with others, of course) he'd only been away a week and a half on an A class – it was a lot shorter and sharper than he'd been anticipating but he was given a clean shot early and he took it.<p>

When he left, Sakura was in roughly the same mood as she had been for the few weeks previous: distant, cold but fighting-the-good-fight; although it irritated him to no end that he had to dance around her and pretend that _no, he couldn't see that all her smiles were so fake_ but he was convinced now that it was the right way to go. Pushing Sakura away would get neither anywhere – and going behind her back amounted to the same as him using his Sharingan on her to glean information through underhanded methods and then trying to apologise and make-it-up-to-her afterwards.

Not only did he think that that would still leave him with a few unanswered questions but that he'd face the (excessively fiery) wrath of two abnormally strong women. The other also having the power to make his live _living hell_ to boot – in short, not worth it. Besides, he wanted a challenge of some description, right? Of course he did, but he hadn't expected to return to such a... hollow, _detached_ look about her; his concern grew, immediately guessing that _something_ had happened to make her so disheartened but for the life of him he couldn't imagine _what_.

She had pre-empted _every single one_ of his earlier moves, so why hadn't she pre-empted and therefore deflected the one which made her like this?

Was it something or someone?

A 'someone' seemed far more likely, they were less predictable and solid in their actions – especially when one was the cause of an upset – and therefore they tended to be harder to quantify. Kakashi was sure that he could already rule out any of the rookie nine and Gai's students – not only was Sakura far to well respected among them now, she wouldn't hesitate to knock them into next week if they stepped out of line. For the pink-haired medic to be acting in such a fashion, she had to have been upset by someone untouchable to her, a superior.

Tsunade? Unlikely, although prone to some fierce moods (Kakashi couldn't really blame her, the Hokage's seat had to be probably the most stressful but boring job Kakashi could imagine) Sakura wouldn't have made it so far if she couldn't handle Tsunade. Besides the two had a close relationship and Tsunade was the 'shinobi mother' Sakura never had.

Any of Kakashi's generation shinobi seemed unlikely as well, whilst many could seem aloof or irritated with the young shinobi, it was their duty to bring up the Kouhais[juniors] and hence it would be meaningless to purposefully cause such a disruption. But Sakura was also a consummate professional, allowing nothing to interfere whilst she was on a task. So what happens once the task is complete? Does she carry around any nasty actions against her? She always was sensitive, maybe they didn't interfere with her work _directly_ but if they hampered the other aspects of her life?

He was loosing himself in circles with still no answers, he needed to get closer – he was still too far to see the finer detail.

They eventually came to the training grounds and Kakashi re-pocketed his book, standing directly opposite her, he could think of ways to test if he thought that Sakura was carrying such burdens around. He could say a few unsavoury things to her and observe her afterwards but then would be self-defeating and perhaps a little cruel – as much as he didn't like the conclusion, no matter what, he needed Sakura to willingly tell him everything.

Treating her as anything less than a friend or trying to force answers out of her would get him no where and only recreate the very gulf he was trying to bridge. No, for now, he needed to make sure that he became a familiar presence in the background, always present but not expecting anything and when that level had been achieved, he could step a little closer.

"Ready, Kakashi?"

"Hai..." The both stepped back into a defensive stance, "Start," they both immediately disappeared as Kakashi hid himself away in the foliage knowing to keep his guard up whilst he tried to focus upon finding and analyzing Sakura. She was swift, her attacks perfectly aimed as Kakashi had to dodge as much as he could block; she didn't let up as her movements flowed perfectly but all too easily for his Sharingan to read and pre-empt.

Block, kick, as she flies backwards he prepares the Jutsu – it's only a simple one but will provide him with enough cover to set out the trap which won't take long to spring. He knows that Sakura can be predictable to him as she thinks he is predictable to her – if he used a Katon, he'd follow it up with a doton; not this time, although she pre-empted his nonexistent doton by smashing open the earth before he could hide himself. He was able to observe her pull out varying weapons connected by wire apparently too-

"Hatake-san, Tsunade-sama requests your presence for a mission briefing, _immediately_," An ANBU suddenly arrived on the scene, all three of their mutual skills and reaction times ensure that Sakura's attack was never released rather than hit the wrong man. Kakashi paused, unmoving for a moment, the last thing he wanted right now was to be sent out on another mission.

"Hai, hai, I'll just finished my spar with Sakura here, then I'll head over,"

"_Now_, Hatake-san, Hokage-sama's orders were quite clear,"

"Fine..." He leapt out of his hiding place, "I'm sorry Sakura, but we'll have to finish this when I return," She nodded and began to repack away her weapons,

"I know... It's alright," He nodded to the younger Kuniochi as the ANBU and himself darted away, arriving in the Hokage's office moments later. He knocked and stepped in noticing one other man in full ANBU gear stood in front of the Godaime's desk,

"Ah, Kakashi, you weren't busy, I trust?" Did she really expect him to be honest? _Well, yes, actually, you've just caused me quite a large disruption!_

"Not at all, Hokage-sama,"  
>"Good... I'm sending you two on a pursue-and-neutralize; this guy has caused us trouble to no end and after previous attempts to both reason and buy him out have proved fruitless we're left with the only option of assassination. I want you both to go as a two man cell – usually this would be a solo, Kakashi, but your here teammate was on one of the previous missions dealing with this guy and knows his mannerisms – he's paranoid to say the least and knows what caution is," Kakashi nodded, "To this end, I would also like a medic to accompany you; they can stay out of the actual battle field and be there merely to tend to the worst of the injuries whilst you make it home," Kakashi didn't even need to blink;<p>

"I want Haruno Sakura,"

"No,"  
>"What? Why not?" Kakashi was surprised,<p>

"She isn't suitable for this mission; I suggest Tsubi Asuka, she's young and a skilled Chuunin but is a very capable medic who's worked closely with both Shizune and Sakura," Kakashi resisted the urge to narrow his eye, _what isn't she telling him?_

"Acceptable... But may I ask why Sakura is not suitable for this mission?"

"She will be more effective here," Tsunade picked up the scroll and tossed it towards Kakashi; "You shouldn't be long on this mission and remember to keep Asuka out of harms way as much as possible,"

"... I understand, Hokage-sama," _'She will be more effective here' what the hell does that mean? Does Sakura have some past with the target? Unlikely if any medic needs to stay away from the actual battle zone, so how could Sakura possibly be 'unsuitable' for this mission? Hmm... _


	12. Chapter 12

Title of this chapter is from 'Sussudio' by Phil Collins [although unsure if that was the artist name he was under at the time of this song] *Memebase: Close enough*

Whoa, second update for the day! Got a bit of a head-rush of inspiration for this story this morning, there might even be a third for the day 0.0!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_12. I Feel So Good If I Just Say The Word..._

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><p>Kakashi wanders towards the gate – he is a comfortable hour and a half late – not bad but he wants this mission to be over a quickly as possible and get back to his deciphering of a surprisingly tricky female. He spots the ANBU in the same bear mask from Tsunade's office – why he hadn't bothered to introduce himself was anyone's guess, but Kakashi doesn't care as long as he is cooperative. He also spots a young woman with long purple hair, the medic, he presumes, he can hear her mutter '<em>finally<em>' under her breath as he walks up to them, slipping _Icha Icha Paradise_ back into his pouch. Clearing his throat to catch their attention, he introduces himself,

"I am Hatake Kakashi,"

"Tsubi Asuka," The young woman remarks, her pale cerise eyes flash with amiability as both their attentions turn to the last man who pulled away his mask revealing a slender but cold face his eyes a similar green to Sakura's but hold no vibrancy, his hair short and impossibly dark – he looks like he's laughed one time too few in his life.

"Renshi,"

"Good, now that we're all introduced how about we set off? Renshi-san, I believe that you said we need to head towards the boarder of Fire and River country?" He issues a sharp nod, "Excellent... Asuka-chan, you are aware that you need to keep not only as low a profile as possible, but avoid as much conflict as you can as well,"

"I know, I was briefed properly,"

"Good, let's go then," All three are gone in a blur of movement and uniform, quickly falling into formation with Kakashi taking point and Renshi at the rear with Asuka between them.

They continue to run until night begins to fall, nobody said much beyond the occasional issuing of orders; they soon grind to a halt, Asuka is exhausted whilst Kakashi and Renshi are fatigued but no more so than usual. Kakashi takes the opportunity to stretch out his leg muscles and shoulders particularly, whilst Renshi disappears off to quickly scout the area. Asuka is sat merely resting on the ground as Kakashi manages to click his shoulder joint free of strain.

As much as he doesn't really like to admit it, he really does feel better after ridding his body of the tension accumulated since his new questions about Sakura and then a full day of running at near top speed hadn't done him any favours. Although it's definitely felt better when Sakura massages it over exercises – but it seems to be yet another annoying juxtaposition with her: it was precisely _because_ of her and all the stress he isn't used to in trying to answer the puzzle, that he needs her to massage his tension away.

God _damn_ he isn't used to feeling so on edge by questions which only raise other questions instead of answering them.

And what the hell does Tsunade know that she's not letting on? It seems that she is aware _something_ is affecting Sakura... Is it missions in general? Or-

"Hatake-Taichou?"

"Hmm?" He responded – _someone else to interrupt my thoughts!_ – without looking at her, although turns his head slightly as another display to show he is listening,

"What are you doing?"

"Stretching, what does it look like?"

"I know that, but why? Are you injured?"

"Not really... Just been retaining a little more tension in my muscles than usual, lately... Sakura tends to give me a hard time if I don't deal with it properly," He isn't sure why he said the last part, but it seems to work in his favour,

"Do you mean Haruno Sakura-san?"

"That's right, why?" Kakashi fully turns around not sure what to expect,

"Oh! Then I wonder why Haruno-san was passed over for this mission?" She seems to speak mostly to herself, "Hmm... I bet its because she and Renshi-san have a very antagonistic relationship," Kakashi stares at the young Chuunin as she sits with her arms folded over her chest and her eyes closed nodding to herself, _antagonistic? _Kakashi isn't sure what to make of the snippet of information – it's rare, after all, for Sakura to be so at odds especially with a _superior_ in the form of an ANBU – Sakura tends to get irritated with a lot of people but it is exceptionally rare for her to be hateful of anyone;

"Asuka, what do you mean?" Her eyes bolt open and she looks momentarily terrified of the Jounin who stood in a relatively relaxed posture with a hand in his pocket but staring intensely at the young medic,

"Uh, oh, uh, nothing Hatake-san," He narrows his eye slightly, the silent question isn't missed,

"Asuka..."

"Uh... I-I don't know what happened but Haruno-san and Renshi-san were on a mission together a while back I know that one of the team members died and both Haruno-san and Renshi-san were very nearly killed as well... I'm not sure what happened but they seemed to return separately... I've never seen Tsunade-sama look both so angry and relieved when Haruno-san finally returned nearly three days after R-"

"Tsubi-_san_, I don't think it would be wise for you to say any more." The cool voice of Renshi cut through Asuka's rambling-like tale, the young Kuniochi can't close her mouth fast enough as Renshi shoots her a look so fierce that Kakashi wonders if the ANBU might kill her were he not to step in fast enough,

"Renshi-san, what happened on that mission?"

"That is none of your concern... What matters here is this mission, _Taichou_," Kakashi stares at the young man for a few moments he doesn't need to see his face to read his expression – the archetypal young, angry and arrogant – authority other than their own not recognised. Surprising for him to be in ANBU, but Kakashi can remember being of that mentality when he was younger;

"I will decide what matters on this mission, Renshi-san," He eyes the ANBU unwaveringly for a few more minutes before turning back to Asuka,

"Have you ever been on a mission with Sakura, Asuka?" She looks at the two men for a few moments, able to feel a physically real tension between them,

"N-no I haven't,"

"Mou... That's no good, but I'm sure you will soon; she's good at teamwork, ne Renshi-san?" Kakashi can the ANBU grit his teeth at the remark... Or maybe at the Jounin's sudden change of temperament; "Well... we should probably get some rest, have you finished setting the traps, Renshi-san?"

"Hai,"

"Good, then I'll take first watch and I'll wake you up when it's time, Renshi-san... Let's leave our disagreements here, I'll need both of your full cooperation on this mission and whatever problems there are, it can wait until we're back in Konoha, agreed?"

"Hai,"

"Hai, Hatake-Taichou,"

"Good!" Both of his two teammates turn in as Kakashi leaps up into a tree his senses open wide but his mind buzzing from the new information:

_The 'someone' causing her trouble must be Renshi;_

_Sakura lost a teammate on that mission – is that why she's so reluctant to be involved with Team 7? Nah, couldn't be she's been through far worse and some of the most desperate missions with Naruto and I, besides teamwork was the first lesson I drilled into those three... _

_Was Asuka going to say, 'three days after Renshi'? Did Renshi break the rule of teamwork and desert her?_

_Is that why she's so guarded? _

_But that still doesn't explain it all, there's something else at work... Sorry Sakura, but I don't think I can dance around this for much longer._


	13. Chapter 13

Lol, I can imagine what you must be thinking about the title of this chapter and Kakashi...

Hooo... _Third_ update for the day! Nuts!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_13. I Was There And I Saw What You Did, Saw It With My Own Two Eyes_

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><p>Kakashi has just finished forming the seals for Chidori as he rushes forward to drive his fist through his enemy's chest as Renshi thrust his sword through another; they've taken out their intended target but are struggling to escape from the compound he'd been hiding in. To say the man was cautious and paranoid really didn't cut it – he'd set so many traps that it took twice as long to locate the room he was hiding in.<p>

The hideout itself was close to the border and barely a day from Konoha but they'd needed to stop and observe the target for a little while as well as formulate escape plans; Asuka is currently at a small inn a couple of kilometres inside the Fire country and is maintaining clones to provide an alibi for them.

Luckily, they possess radios to cover the extended distance and Kakashi had, at first, thought them to be unnecessary but as he catches a glimpse of Renshi getting severely hit by a wind based Jutsu which nearly slices the man in half, Kakashi is grateful. He whispers lowly, but just enough to be over heard by some of the other screams, he grabs Renshi and drags them away;

"Asuka, we're heading back and Renshi-san is badly injured and there are too many remaining enemies here... Call for back up,"

"Understood," Her voice quickly disappears, Kakashi is aware of just how low his chakra is but he felt sure that he _could_ finish off most of them or at least wound them badly enough but that simply _isn't_ an option with Renshi in the state he is in. Kakashi, supporting almost all of his weight can feel his clothes becoming sticky with the sheer volume of blood the ANBU is loosing.

He leaps away trying to force his mind to focus on the task of escaping and hiding their trail from pursuers whilst getting Renshi to medical aid fast enough. He tries not to gag at the foul stench of so much blood right under his nose, his instincts kicking in as one of his heightened senses is compromised due to his teammate's state;

_Shit! What the hell did Renshi think he was doing taking a risk like that? It managed to free us from that damn room but it meant he left himself wide open to that Jutsu_...

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><p>Kakashi is suddenly aware of the faint chatter of voices – two, female, close to him, he tries to move but his body is screaming at him and all he can manage is to open his eye; he's immediately greeted by the sight of a ceiling, lit by the glow of what might be a candle or some other modest light source. He groans randomly, not quite meaning to but wanting to get the attention of either Sakura or the other woman, having since recognised at least one of their chakra signatures,<p>

"Kakashi, you're awake, finally," A pink head appears in his line of vision; her face expresses the epitome of professional, medical concern – at least she's not smiling, "You've been out for nearly two days," She immediately presses a hand to his forehead, which, he realizes, is bare and she slips a hand beneath his head, lifting it slightly, "Take a drink," she holds the glass out and her face is so passive that it almost seems there isn't really anyone there to show his face to. She averts her eyes nonetheless and she's quick to replace his mask after before she moves back a little.

"How does your body feel?"

"Terrible... How's Renshi-san?" Kakashi could almost swear that he can see Sakura pull a hood over her head and lower her face slightly, like a teenager confronted with an adult she doesn't like;

"He's pulled through the worst of it now; I'm just waiting for him to wake up and regain some of his strength before he'll be able to move properly again." Kakashi would have nodded, but he isn't able; Sakura finds her feet and walks away from him, as he lies there the feeling slowly begins to return to his body and he finds that he's able to move his hands and feet a little. Soon, he's able haul himself up to a seated position where he can get a better look at the room.

Renshi is lying flat on his back, his breathing slow but deep, a set of clean clothes were folded at his side and the stench of blood was still thick in the air. Kakashi is amazed that the he managed to survive that injury and what must have been at least a day of minimal treatment before Sakura arrived and, for that matter, how the hell are the rest of them alive? How did Asuka fend off their pursuers by herself with two wounded and unconscious?

"Kakashi," Sakura's pale, petite voice cuts across his thoughts, he finds her eyes, which are written over with concern as she rises to her feet, Kakashi finally spots Asuka's presence lying in a bed on the far side of Renshi; Sakura looks somehow fragile in the low light but the strength in her is something he knows by _instinct_ rather than by sight. "Please remain in bed, I'll bring you a meal and some more water," Her voice is gentle and has him irresistibly obeying her, nodding at the Kuniochi, she slides open the door, quickly disappearing.

She returns with a bowl of hot o-kayu [rice gruel] it wasn't what he really wanted, but as soon as he's eaten a bite, it brings a warmth to his bones he didn't know he needed and finishes it all without any complaint. He feels a comfortable satiation but he needs knowledge before he can truly rest,

"Sakura..."

"Get some rest, Kakashi, there are still a number of hours before dawn,"

"I know but I need to know what's happened, how the hell are we free from attack?" Her eyes travel over him for a few moments; he isn't sure what's under her scrutiny – his body or his _self_,

"Asuka, it seems, had just enough chakra left to cast a Genjutsu and she managed to deflect the enemy long enough for us to get here... Genma and Raidou are keep guard outside," Kakashi nods, that's enough information, for now, to put him at ease:

"Thank you,"

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><p>Kakashi awakes for the second time and he feels infinitely better, managing to rise to his feet, dress and head outside to speak with Genma for a better handle on the situation. His friend eases him a little and Kakashi explains that whilst he doesn't have much chakra the return journey shouldn't be too much trouble for him so long as they don't encounter the enemy.<p>

He makes his way back towards the room in search of a seat and hopefully another meal, as he walks up to the door he can sense the tension emanating from the room. Suppressing what little chakra he has at the moment, he pauses outside and listens in on their conversation. His intuition tells him that he'll learn more if their exchange is unguarded;

"Renshi-san, you must remain still or you wounds will re-open,"

"Tch, if you'd done a good enough job, then they would already be healed,"  
>"I had both of your teammates to heal as well,"<p>

"Then is the reason that they're not here mean that you thought it wasn't worth the effort this time?"

"How _dare_ you, they're fine and in a better state than you because they didn't stupidly rush into battle without thinking," The silence which follows is awkward and Kakashi isn't sure what he's supposed to do... Apparently their _'antagonistic_' relationship was a little more serious than Asuka let on.

"And I suppose that Keisuke 'stupidly rushed into battle', huh? You _killed_ him for making a 'mistake'? Why didn't you give me that same _honour_?" Kakashi's blood runs cold before he can stop it, killed?_ Killed?_ Renshi has to be exaggerating, he _has_ to be; does he mean that Sakura simply _wasn't able_ to save their teammate? That must be it, Keisuke, Renshi and Sakura – those names aren't the most common and it shouldn't be too difficult to snoop around.

"I-I..."

"You're no medic... Medics are supposed to save and protect and I saw _none of that_... You just... Just..."There is the sound of scuffling as Kakashi prepared to enter the room but he soon hears footsteps on the tatami mats and the door slides open to show him a Sakura he definitely doesn't recognise. He almost would rather a fake smile to _this;_ that dead, hollow, empty look about her is worse than he can remember on her and Kakashi can't bring himself to move out of the way. He's torn between wanting to encircle Sakura in his arms if it'll get rid of that _god damned dead look_ about her, if he can feel her body heat maybe it would prove that she is actually _alive_.

But he also wants to question her and Renshi about exactly what the _fuck_ happened.

He knows too, that he'd rather not force the Kuniochi into a darker corner than she's already in, so he steps aside and she pads away without noise and without looking back. He can still feel her emptiness, though. He steps into the room to see Renshi on his back with the crook of his elbow flung over his eyes.

Did he imagine saying that their problems could wait until they're back in Konoha?


	14. Chapter 14

Lol, I didn't want to overload you with three updates again today, so one it is ^.^

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again <em>**

_14. Well I Remember, I Remember Don't Worry, How Could I Ever Forget? It's the First Time, the Last Time We Ever Met_

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><p>Kakashi makes sure to keep close to Sakura as the entire group – all six of them – make their way back through the gates, Sakura demands that all three of team Kakashi report to the hospital for a final check. This time, Kakashi doesn't complain, he isn't ready to leave Sakura's side and allow the valuable opportunity to glean information to slip away. It draws her attention that she doesn't have to fight him, but she looks so <em>tired<em>, so very _tired_ that he can't bring himself to fight her even if he wanted to. As they approach the Godaime's office first (everyone is in good enough shape to report in initially), Kakashi can see Sakura tensing with each step – _what does Tsunade know that he doesn't?_ She knocks on the door and although everybody walks in the next seconds become a blur of nods and the occasional 'hai, Hokage-sama'. Tsunade leans forward to rest her elbows on the table and clasp her hands under her chin,

"Thank you, Asuka, Raidou and Genma... You can all take a day or two off before I'll put you back on active duty... Asuka, take three days off, the hospital will be able to manage," They all nod,

"Hai, arigatou, Hokage-sama," The three leave and Renshi is stood to Kakashi's left so Sakura is to his right, if his flesh wasn't already heightened to his lightening natured chakra, he's sure that he would have long been burnt.

"Alright, firstly, nothing spoke here leaves this room, got it?" She received three nods, although two were imperceptible from the shinobi beside him, "Kakashi, were there any major disruptions to the team or arguments as a result of, or between Sakura and Renshi?" Tsunade is strangely serious and it was such an odd question... Especially for her to be so secretive about it,

"The last night we stayed at the inn before we return to Konoha, I overheard an intense exchange between the two and they were quite distant from each other – as much as they were able – throughout the return journey. Although I would not go so far as to suggest that it shook my confidence in their ability to work as a team when needed, I felt it did create tension and a minor disruption to the team's overall amiability."

"I see..." Tsunade eyes them for a moment, her expression glazed over enough that it is impossible to even guess at what she might be thinking; Kakashi can feel that he's just slid, helplessly down a snake and he's almost back to where he started – hollow empty smiles and a labyrinth of confusion.

So who's the Minotaur at the end? Is it Sakura or is it Renshi? Or is it Keisuke?

"I've told you both better than this. You both promised me that you'd be able to keep your personal feelings out of missions." Tsunade sighs heavily,

"My apologies, Godaime Hokage-sama," Renshi speaks with the same cool detachment Kakashi was now used to from him, "With respect, however, I do not think that it is fruitful to include Hatake-san in this..." Tsunade raises her eyes and locks them with Renshi's,

"That isn't your decision," He doesn't say any more, but they can all hear his silent sneer, _'Is it Sakura's?_'

"I-I agree with Renshi-san, this is none of his business," The Hokage sighs as Kakashi flashes his eye over to his former student, _why would the Hokage want my involvement now? What's changed? _Said woman fixes her gaze on the silver-haired Jounin, knowing that he above all would have the most adverse reaction;

"How much do you know, Kakashi?"

"Not much... I was told there was a mission of some description and that a teammate died,"

"Tsunade-shishou... Kakashi please..." Sakura turns her head slightly, but doesn't look up or meet his gaze,

"Don't you think this has gone on long enough, Sakura? It would seem that Team 7 has _finally_ noticed your absence..." Kakashi internally winces at Tsunade's dig,

"No, I _don't_ think it's gone on long enough, it will never have 'gone on long enough'," Kakashi can hear the checked aggression but there is also an edge to it, like the actor who can't cook up a _deus ex machina_ fast enough to cover her tracks from the reader - or the author. The voice is no longer pale, but it isn't exactly full of _youthful_ passion or liveliness – its more like the resolve of emptiness is simply stronger. The Kuniochi spins on her heel to leave but Kakashi gips her forearm halting her movement and catches her eye in the process, the silent challenge isn't lost between them as she directs her chakra just enough to rip her arm form his clutches and slams the door behind her.

Apparently any need for them to visit the hospital has been dropped and then stamped on.

"Sakura! ... Damnit," Tsunade sighs,

"What are you going to do with her?" Renshi's voice is cold and unforgiving, Kakashi is struggling to make sense of all of the information but he doesn't have enough pieces to even gather an outline... _what's missing?_

"Renshi, you're pushing it...We have been over it all before and I consider it _resolved_. You're forgetting how easily I let you off." The ANBU falls silent, "Kakashi, I suppose that you are the best candidate to help Sakura with this... Haa... But as I'm sure you've guessed, it isn't easy to force out of her what she doesn't want to tell..." Kakashi nods,

"Forgive me, but was Keisuke-san her friend?" Tsunade's eyes widen at his remark, surprise and uncertainty scribbled all over her face, Renshi hacks out a laugh, but there's nothing full, joyful or hearty about it – it hints at the pain beneath;

"How _could_ she be? She'd never met him before _then_,"

"Renshi you're dismissed, take a little time off to rest," He nods and disappears in a puff of smoke, Kakashi feels awkward and unbalanced, when was the last time he was in the middle, in no-mans-land?

"It's about time Sakura came to terms with this... Help her as best you can," Kakashi nods, he doesn't need to be ordered, or even asked but neither does he know where to start.

How can _he_ be the best candidate for the job? Yes he's lost teammates, both in fact, but there's barely a shinobi who _hasn't_ and he still hasn't really come to terms with it.

How can he _possibly_ be the best candidate?

He feels as confused as the first time he spotted her in that Jounin lounge all those weeks ago and despite his efforts, he really is no closer to finding the truth.

"Dismissed."


	15. Chapter 15

I really hope that none of this is all _that_ predictable – obviously some of it will be but I hope it isn't _painfully_ evident... I can oly hope that the "thot plickens" to a satisfactory standard!

Yo, to _Absolute. Tranquillity_: I'm sorry about Renshi-san! Lol *inserts remorseful face* [sorry, I have no idea what combination of random symbols would result in that face!] But thank you for your ever amazing support!

As with everyone else who had taken the time to review! It really means a lot! *very happy and slightly overwhelmed* ^.^

I hope this doesn't seem out of character or too melodramatic or anything...

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_15. If You Told Me You Were Drowning, I Would Not Lend A Hand_

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><p>Sakura stands in front of the KIA stone, she wants to cry but isn't able to find the tears, instead all her energy and expenditure is used merely for keeping herself upright – and breathing. Her eyes float over the polished marble in front of her, countless names, countless <em>names<em> – people, beings, women –_men_... Men like Keisuke. Shichida Keisuke.

He was:-

Young, 23 and about two and a half weeks from taking his ANBU entrance exam;

He had bright, azure blue eyes – the sort of blue that made the sky memorizing on a perfect summer's day;

He was intelligent – he'd passed the Jounin exam with the highest marks for the past seven years running;

He was handsome enough – in a classic sort of way;

Gay, too – although she'd never have guessed. It made Sakura ashamed that at one point, she'd thought she could tell hetero from homosexual with a glance; it took until she witnessed he and Renshi sharing a last kiss right before the climax of that mission – it was as tender and unadulterated as she could possibly have imagined. It only added to her heartbreak and, no doubt, to Renshi's too.

His hair was short, constantly ruffled in a relaxed sort of way.

It was a lot like his personality – he seemed permanently relaxed, it was, of course, nothing like Kakashi's – the man was far too young for that, but there was a semblance of Kakashi – in his easy manner and exceptionally level-headed outlook.

Sakura continues to stare at the marble – _so many names_ – they all, in theory, have murderers responsible for their deaths, in the midst of battle... But how many have befallen their death-_their murder_-by one who heralded from the same village? Their teammate in the midst of battle?-

"Sakura," _Kakashi_, "Why are you here?"

"I needed a place to think,"

"If you're busy, I can come and find you later..."

"What do you want?" He is irritating her (_he has done for the past few weeks)_, but she can't bring herself to take it out on him;

"Well, I was hoping for another one of your wonderful massages... Although I wasn't quite expecting to find you here, I was planning on meditating first and then coming to find you,"

"Oh..."

"I'll leave if you want,"

"No... It's alright," She turns around but cannot bear to face him, gluing her eyes to the ground, "Come to my apartment when you're done, I'll wait for you there... There's no rush," She breezes past him, he makes no move to stop her, this time,

"Thank you," His words are heartfelt but in a -_kind_- way it nearly reduces her to tears but she forces them back and walkes off without so much as a look back; she can barely bring herself let out the breath which is threatening to burst her lungs until he's far beyond sight.

She paces down the streets, attempting to look relaxed and in control of her emotions; her paces are slow and deliberate forcing herself to believe for the moment that if she hide her emotions from her face, she can hide her emotions from herself. She isn't looking forward to having to see Kakashi later, _no doubt Tsunade has decided, in her infinite wisdom, to include him and allow him to snoop around as he pleases_.

She wanted to refuse his request for a massage but she knows he would just find another way to barge in and be far less amenable – he doesn't really like doing things against his way – especially where Team 7 are concerned. And its hollow, ghost of a student. She isn't sure how Kakashi will broach the topic; his usual style is to play a goofy idiot, then ask directly when their guard has dropped low enough so that they can't duck back under it and so give an answer.

She was prepared for him last time, but he didn't know what questions to ask then – it was easy.

This time, he'll know exactly what to ask and what to say – he's a man who knows how to disarm even the strongest before they've realized it. It won't be easy for her just to remain silent and even if she does, her face and body language will show her up far quicker – especially without words to focus on.

How can she get him to drop this?

It's about teammates, of course it will be impossible to get _Kakashi_ to leave it alone-

She can feel his eyes on her, can sense his angered chakra, _why is he here?_ Sakura looks up to meet his cold green eyes as he's stood in the centre of the street, there are a few other people milling around but they've already been forgotten about. If Sakura could think of anything worthwhile to say to him, might have tried but she remains still, in observation for the moment. He stares right back neither giving anything away for a few moments,

"You got off pretty lightly," She can see his hand clench over his bicep, "You always do get off pretty light with Tsunade... What else has she turned a blind eye to?" Sakura can feel her temper flare but she manages to dampen it slightly, blowing up at him will not be worth her while,

"She did _not_ turn a blind eye; I have paid my price, Renshi-san, that's all," Sakura's hands ball to fists as she prepares for a fight – but of fists or emotions she's not sure,

"No, you paid your price for that _day_, I'm paying the price for the rest of his life," She wants to snap at him or say something derogatory to get him to leave her alone but then again, he's lost more than she has. She can't imagine that sort of loss, she lost Sasuke, but he was just 'elsewhere' – still alive, still there is a chance he could return.

She merely stares at him for a few more minutes, not moving, speaking or even blinking – she has no idea what the right thing to do is: avoid him? Meet with him regularly? Become his friend? Apologise again? Never speak to or of him again? There are too many options for only two emotions and none seem to be the right thing to do. All she can manage is a step forward followed by another and another until she's walking past him, he doesn't need to say anything as she can feel the hatred emanating off of him. Perhaps if she were in his shoes she'd feel the same – she can't blame him.

She can only blame herself.

She just plods one foot in front of the other and doesn't stop or slow until she reaches her destination, her apartment, she climbs the stairs in the same robotic fashion her mind busy reliving memories. She doesn't _want_ to know, but there's no way that she can't _not_ know. She pulls out her key and twists it in the lock as she walks into her apartment and slams the door behind her she wonders, if Keisuke still possess a consciousness somehow or is able to see from his afterlife, does it ease his pain to see how remorseful and guilt-ridden his murderess is? That she takes the time to honour his memory?-

Her thoughts are interrupted by a hurried knock, _oh please, not now!_


	16. Chapter 16

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_16. But I Know The Reason Why You Give Me Silence_

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><p>Kakashi suppresses his chakra as he appears outside of Sakura's apartment building, he'd been at the memorial stone for not long after she'd left, his eye scanned over the stone finding a few 'Keisukes' but he wasn't aware of a family name so couldn't match them up. He wanted to remain for a few hours or so to clear his head an allow him to approach Sakura calmly to not confuse himself and push her away but his feet bring him to her quicker than anticipated. As he steadily climbs the stairs, Kakashi can hear his voice almost before his chakra signature,<p>

"But Sakura-chan, he upset you, I can see it!"

"Naruto, leave it alone!" Sakura's impassioned but somehow tired voice cuts across him as Kakashi darts up the remaining steps, Naruto's brand of 'care' here will only harm her more,

"What's going on?" He makes sure to keep his voice cool and curious, Naruto spins around as two sets of eye glue to him,

"K-Kakashi-sensei, what are you doing here?" Naruto looks strangely confused, _is it really that odd for him to show up here?_

"I came to see Sakura,"

"So did I! Some guy upset her earlier, but she won't tell me who or why!" Naruto points an accusatory finger at the shrinking pink,

"Oh? Well, I'm sure Sakura will tell me if she thinks it's appropriate, besides, Sakura is an accomplish Jounin level shinobi, Naruto, I'm certain that she can handle herself,"

"But Kakashi-sensei-!"

"Anyway, Sakura owes me a massage, so we'll see you later Naruto," Kakashi pushed past the slightly younger male and closed the door on him, muffling his

"_What!-?_" Ever so slightly, Kakashi grinned down at his only former female student, thankful that Naruto had inadvertently broken the ice, so to speak;

"Well, shall we?" She meets his gaze immediately and nods, as he toes off his sandals and Sakura walks over to her futon,

"Just your back or legs as well?" An innocent question, but they tend to be the most dangerous,

"Just my back, please,"

"Ok, shirt off then," She turns her back for a few moments, as Kakashi pulled his shirt over his head and laid down on her futon, he relaxes easily as she kneels beside him and her hands begin on his shoulders, whatever tension he was feeling before arriving has certainly drained now.

"You're here to get me to tell you what happened on that mission, aren't you?" He immediately stiffens at one of the last sentences he expects to hear from her, how could she have caught him so off guard? This is most _definitely_ a time for honesty – if ever there was one,

"...Yes, but I can't and won't force it out of you... Of course I want to know, but I also want you to _want_ to tell me, I want you to feel comfortable doing so," There is a pause, Kakashi can guess her inner response being along the lines of _I'll never be comfortable telling you_,

"Kakashi, what did Tsunade say after I left?" She resumes her work over his back but there's a heavy 'clinical feel' to it, Sakura's quick to detach herself from within,

"She wants me to help you,"

"She wanted you to help me back then,"

"What?" Sakura doesn't pause her actions but Kakashi is forced to check himself to make sure he doesn't suddenly sit up and collide with her,

"She thought I should speak to you then, but... But..." He waits just long enough in case she has more to say,

"It's alright, I won't force you," He knows that their current inability to make eye-contact is key here, "Sakura, may I ask you something?" He hopes that the indirect sense and obviousness that it isn't quite _that_ will help, but he's met with silence, "Why is it that you don't _want _to tell me?" Her hands move abruptly down to the base of his spine to work up – he's not sure if that's something worth interpreting, her hands keep moving, but his body is struggling to recognise it as _Sakura_.

Intangible again, Sakura-chan has never seemed so distant; not even when she was just a little girl interested in only one boy, but now she's never be harder to understand.

"How could you ever understand? _Forgive me_?" Her voice is quiet and low, Kakashi almost struggles to hear it properly, but she continues before he can comfort her, "We took your teachings to heart, you know, Naruto and I. I don't think we ever really vocalised them to ourselves or each other, but we always knew that, respectively, we'd come first to the mission and you and Sasuke and then Yamato-Taichou and Sai – even if he did drive us crazy," She takes her elbow to his back, although it lacks some of its normal vigour;

"I don't understand,"

"I violated the primary thing you taught us... At least I think I did, what is one life in relation to the team? Does the loss of that life mean the loss of the team? Or is the team as a whole the most important part? Was Keisuke's sacrifice worth it for Renshi's life and mine?"

"I can't answer that, Sakura, there _is_ no right answer," Her fingertips dig into his shoulder blades and Kakashi suspects that it giving her something to focus on, he doesn't mind; it's pleasurable and gives him something to focus on, too.

"There is to Renshi... Keisuke should have remained-_survived_ instead of me... They were both so bent on completing the mission..." Sakura lapses into silence as she pulls her hands away and rises to her feet, Kakashi remains on the bed for a moment unsure of how to interpret her words.

He sits up and pulls his shirt over his head as Sakura walks away, presumably to her bathroom and silver-hair uses the time to think over what he's already learned, _she certainly seems more willing to speak of it, but what's with the sudden turn around? She hasn't even offered a fake smile in days... What's brought it all to a head? Renshi? Having to go on another mission with him? That fact I was witness to some exchanges between them? But how does that still mean I'm the 'best candidate'?_

Kakashi is struggling to fit everything together, he promised not to push Sakura and he fully intends to stick to that, but needs more information, what happened on that mission?

There's a claim of murder but there's no evidence to support it – how is Sakura allowed her current freedoms?

Neither Sakura nor Renshi have come to terms with Keisuke's death.

Why would Sakura ever think that she couldn't trust him? Or that he would ever hate her?

"Kakashi? You are free to leave you know," Sakura returns and she wants him to leave, but Kakashi remains seated,

"Sakura... What's changed? Why are you suddenly willing to open up? Why has Tsunade chosen now to involve me, when she wanted it some time ago, but didn't?" The younger Kuniochi hesitates for a split second before moving over and taking a seat on the folded futon acting as a sofa, she doesn't sit too close to the male, but not too far either,

"Tsunade warned me before we left that if anything happened, she'd step in... And I guessed that would mean involving you," Kakashi merely nods as he takes on board all the information, she doesn't need to say much to pass a lot on. As he sits there in the awkward but not painful silence, Kakashi knows that he really _does_ care what the problem is – no matter what he previously thought... What he thought when he as grossly underestimating the problem, and _her_.

His mind continues to focus and it's suddenly clear to Kakashi, _he_ is not the 'ideal candidate' as Tsunade put it, but _Sakumo_ would have been – and Kakashi is the only one who could possibly appear in his stead.


	17. Chapter 17

Yes! The title for this chapter is from the song _Don't Lose My Number_, a fantastic song! [Of course by Phil Colllins, lol, what were you expecting? _Really?_] I think it's well worth a listen, a great, upbeat 80s song ^.^ (unfortunately for a less than cheery subject matter - . - ' )

Wow, wow! 25 reviews! Lol this is big news to me! Ah-ha, the most reviews ever lol, I'm so flattered that you guys are enjoying this story and taking the time to let me know! It's really great! You guys are very kind and your support encourages me to work hard and update as often as I can! Thank you!

Also about the ending: I know, I know! More teasing! But at least you know what's coming next..!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_17. They Didn't Know Him and They Didn't Understand; They Never Asked Him Why_

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><p>"W-what? What do you mean, Kakashi?"<p>

"I think that Tsunade-sama meant that Sakumo – my father – would have been the best person to understand you, he's no longer alive hence, Tsunade-sama saw fit to ask me to understand you in his stead," Kakashi can clearly see the mild confusion in her eyes, she isn't in disagreement with his analysis it would seem, but rather, isn't sure what to make of it; "My father was also known as 'White Fang', if that rings a bell,"

"I've heard of him, definitely, but only a gist… I don't know any details," Kakashi can easily imagine Sakura to possess a look much like the one she's giving him now whenever Tsunade was teaching her a complex or interesting lesson – her eyes were wide and expressing only innocent but intelligent curiosity,

"Sak…My father was very well known in his time, had respect on the level of sennin and was almost as skilled; most who knew the man regarded him with great warmth – or at least, that was how it seemed right up until he took a mission which crippled him." Kakashi can't even be sure quite why he is saying this to Sakura, less still why it seems to bother him so little – at how desperate he is to get to the bottom of what is bothering her – that he is prepared to relive and tell _another_ one of the greatest sources of pain and drive in his life;

"K-Kakashi, wait… Why are you telling me this?"

"Because I think that Tsunade would not have reached the conclusion, that my late father and you have shared similar pain, lightly… As far as I can tell, she knew him well enough and you as her apprentice…" Kakashi doesn't really need to finish his sentence, but he feels the need to say a little more before continuing, "If Tsunade is right, which I think she is, then you will at least need to hear his pain to understand the Hokage's reasoning and, if she's right, it may help me to understand you and help you better," Sakura's light expression of interest slowly darkens to a frown – which is no doubt already toned down so as not to immediately trap herself into a corner, but she doesn't say anything for a little while,

"Sakura, I will do everything that I possibly can to help you… The - _ill effects_ of that mission eventually resulted in his death and I will not allow the same to happen to you." She still doesn't look convinced, "Please Sakura; clearly, you have not recovered from whatever happened on that mission and I cannot ignore that fact you are in pain. I'm shocked that you managed to hide it from me for as long as you did. I've already lost one person through this, I will not loose another," He eyes her carefully, she looks as though she doesn't know how to react and he fears for a moment, that he is a little _too_ honest in her somewhat fragile state.

She abruptly rises to her feet and walks over to her little kitchenette, leaning down to rummage in the cupboards she's quick to rise again with one hand clasping a bottle of sake around the neck and the other holding two cups,

"I think I'll need something to drink for this, help yourself if you want some," She places the three items down on the small coffee table and Kakashi takes the opportunity to move a little closer,

"Although he was an exceptionally skilled shinobi, he often took part in team related missions and it was exactly one of those which cost him the most; Sakumo believed, especially strongly that the lives of his teammates were worth more than the completion of a mission. Back then, the entire world was still in great turmoil and ninja were in greater demand than they are now…

"We may not still truly have peace now, but we do possess great stability between the five great nations, especially after the Bijuu wars… but I'm digressing; back then peace only existed as a pocket in war, not the other way around and villages and nations couldn't afford to loose or fail in a single mission for each one lost, was a gain to the enemy – who was everywhere – and almost everyone." Sakura pours herself out a cupful of sake having offered and poured some out for Kakashi, he picks up the cup and swirls the potent rice-wine gently, averting his one open eye down to it,

"He was team leader for a very important mission with two teammates, they were ordered to sneak into enemy territory, into Rock, I think, and steal the documentation on that country's defenses, it required weeks of stealth and tracking before they were finally in a position to act when his two teammates against the agreed plan and ended up getting themselves captured… Sakumo, who had evaded such capture, was in a position to go ahead and steal the documents but he decided, instead, to go and save his teammates, fearing for their lives."

Kakashi finally gulps down the sake, mildly thankful for it although he'll never admit it or show it, "He managed to rescue them, badly injured, but alive… Unfortunately, his decision to save them from the hands of enemy nin cost him his hard-earned opportunity to complete the mission and steal the scrolls. And obviously, afterwards the enemy security was increased nearly ten-fold knowing that Konoha and the Fire country was after its secrets so they'd lost the opportunity for good and were forced to return to Konoha as failures.

"It crippled Sakumo when they returned… The failure of his mission was a massive blow to the Fire country as a whole, not just Konoha and Sakumo paid a higher price than anything the Hokage could possibly have done to punish him… The failure of the mission was well known and everybody blamed him such a massive loss… Even _civilians_ thought they had a right to judge him on what had happened…

"It ate away at him constantly and that was pretty much the very last mission he did – for all of his legendary feats, status and respect - it was all forgotten in a heartbeat and he was nothing but the shame of the Fire country for as long as I could remember then… I was too young for his glory days but I did remember all of the comments about him whilst he was gone on that mission… Everyone had so much faith that he wouldn't fail them and that he would again prove what an exceptional shinobi he was… I suppose that's why everyone took it so much harder when he failed.

"Even the shinobi he saved scorned him, cursed his existence and his failure; as strong as he was, so much constant punishment was too much for anyone, let alone him. A lot of things had gone wrong for him by that point and no matter how strong you or others think you are, there is a breaking point. Maybe he'd long passed his breaking point – too much to recover and he slipped ever deeper into his depression and eventually…he took his own life,"

"I regret it, but back then I suppose I scorned him a little too… I was a Chuunin by that point and the only thing that people saw when they looked at me was him and his failure. No matter what my achievements were – or my father's for that matter – people were only able to see his mistakes and his cost to the Fire country in an already turbulent time. No matter what happened the only thing anyone saw was what a failure he'd become not for the lives he'd saved or for the war he would have indirectly continued. It's a ninja's job to do as ordered – and, of course, rules do exist for a reason, even if it's difficult to see, but it seems that they took the rules too far then… They hated him so much that he almost wasn't safe in his own home…"

Kakashi falls silent, unsure of what is appropriate and what he's comfortable saying, he doesn't meet Sakura's eyes as he reaches over to the bottle of sake and refills both of their cups, Sakura seems to protect the silence for a while as they both digest what's been said. They both sit and drink and it's impossible to tell how much time has passed but eventually Kakashi sneaks a look at the young woman he once thought he knew so easily, he can sense her empathetic pain and remorse – she doesn't need to vocalize it and it occurs to Kakashi how she still needs some reassurance from him,

"Sakura… I don't want to see the same happen to you, no matter what has happened, you're still a trusted Konoha shinobi. You always will be. Please trust me enough to tell me what happened… Obviously Tsunade-sama still trusts you enough to put you on active duty and continue your shifts at the hospital…" Kakashi eyes her carefully averted gaze, like he's touched on something she doesn't really want to acknowledge, something else become clear to the silver-haired Jounin at that point:

Sakura is an adult. She is a full grown, confident adult woman. But that does not necessarily mean that she doesn't need to be reassured when she's uncertain, or that she does not need proper treatment when injured.

"Alright, Kakashi, I'll tell you what happened."


	18. Chapter 18

I know it was a cruel trick to play on you last time, but I had to keep your interest somehow, right? And I thought that I'd danced around telling you guys what happened for long enough, so I needed to let you know that the answer was on its way… ^-^ Although this isn't the end – not even close! Though I hope this chapter satisfies for the mystery mission!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_18. Well, You Finally Came Right Out and Said It, Girl…_

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><p>Sakura is in the process of pouring herself and Kakashi another drink as the male watches her carefully; he can almost see her detach herself from within,<p>

"I suppose our mission was a little like Sakumo-san's… We were a team of three, Renshi-san, Keisuke-san and I… Renshi-san had only just made it into ANBU but due to a minor problem with certain teams who were away, he was assigned to one last Jounin A rank, along with Keisuke-san – his, err…_ lover_ at the time – and myself," Kakashi's didn't quite see that one coming and as a consequence is lucky not to choke on his sake,

"Hmm, well I suppose that explains his hateful reaction when he sees you," Sakura nods in agreement, although her eyes are transfixed on the gentle suspension of liquid in front of her;

"Renshi-san was really excited to be selected as Taichou for that mission and, I think to have Keisuke-san by his side with only one other team member, which was unusual for him. He was always very controlled and certain in his actions and he was most definitely that on the mission but… It's odd when you come to lead your friends for the first time, it's easy to be too stern or not enough so and I feel that's the case especially if you have to make hard decisions." Sakura takes another glug of sake,

"I'm not saying that Renshi-san was a poor or biased Taichou, but I think the unfortunate events of the mission and already high tensions were compounded by the fact there was only one course of action, but Renshi-san didn't want to accept it… It only went downhill from there. It was an assassination mission, but the process of infiltration was quite involved… I can't really give you any details, but it took weeks for them to get a clear shot and we'd agreed that Keisuke-san would go in and take down the target. Hours later, Renshi-san dragged back a half alive Keisuke-san, his injured were incredibly severe combined with a poison was more than I could cope with in the field.

"The poison wasn't unknown to me and I would have been able to construct an antidote if he were in hospital, it takes time to prepare and needs very delicate mixing, in hospital I could have flushed out the worst of it to keep him alive whilst the antidote mixes but out in the field _and_ on the run just wasn't possible…

"Especially since he'd lost a massive amount of blood and was struggling to remain conscious, Renshi-san forced us to move as soon as I'd halted the bleeding but hadn't repaired enough of the tissue damage to allow healing to begin, I guess he suspected that I wouldn't be able to save him without Konoha's help. I eventually got him to halt and we hid as best possible, but the enemy nin were excellent trackers so they were barely an hour or two behind us and we were still four days, non-stop, from Konoha.

"Renshi-san thought we should keep going, that the time we kept still was time wasted, but Keisuke-san, in his condition couldn't handle four days of travel and the poison was a fast acting one, his feet and hands had already gone numb from it. Renshi-san kept watch and I managed to fix up the worst of the physical injuries, but he was still left with a deep gash and puncture to his lung which was preventing me from stabilizing his condition any more than it already was.

"I'd had to heal a sever to his femoral artery and a deep gash to his stomach first, the enemy must have really been something to do so much damage to him but I suspect that he took a few hits for Renshi-san as he was significantly less injured – maybe they'd deviated from the plan slightly as the guard should be less well prepared but it looked almost as though they were anticipating an attack...

"Before I could even being work on his lung or on any of the poison, the enemy found us again and attacked; although they hadn't sent droves to follow us, four highly skilled nin – they must all have been elite Jounin at least – for an already tired Renshi-san; myself, already nearly drained from healing Keisuke-san and said shinobi who was completely incapacitated, was too much. Any further movement to him and his left lung would have been beyond repair, Renshi-san carrying him that far had already worsened a delicate condition.

"Although the enemy nin had caught us up, Renshi-san bought us a few more minutes by intercepting them almost a mile from my location and kept them busy. Keisuke-san regained consciousness for a few minutes and knew that he was in no fit state, there was no way I could outrun or fight the enemy with Keisuke-san's dead weight and they would only have captured him… They would have been able to get him back and heal him in time as their village was still very close, I couldn't allow them to take him and torture him for secrets, which they undoubtedly would have done. Keisuke-san knew this – he always was very pragmatic – he knew what needed to happen as well as I and there wasn't any time to waste…

"Just as I put my hand to his heart and pushed my chakra into him to stop his heart, Renshi-san reappeared with the enemy right behind him hoping to pick up Keisuke-san and leave but he was already dead by that point. I had to work fast and used a Katon to destroy his remains but was quickly intercepted by the enemy and managed to hold my own for a few minutes, I called to Renshi-san for us to leave the area and he eventually complied. He was too fast for me, though, and I couldn't keep up in my chakra weakened state so I was forced to veer off and take an alternative route.

"It took me days to get back to Konoha, by the time I made it was told that Renshi-san had retuned a few days before exhausted, but otherwise not any worse for wear. He was furious at me and I don't blame him… I don't think he fully grasped how dire Keisuke-san's condition really was and he blames me for not working hard enough to save him and maybe I didn't… We spent a lot of time talking to Tsunade-sama, she was livid with him for leaving me behind and I think the only thing which saved him from getting demoted or a more serious punishment than he got was the fact that the mission was a success and Konoha was saved in a lot of ways… hence just the two of them were sent as well as a medic, as helpless as I turned out to be."

Kakashi is struggling a little to fully believe his ears, he would never have believed that Sakura would willingly act in such a fashion – her boundless compassion would usually meant that she would work until utter exhaustion before giving in on even a hopeless case. But to actually _take away_ the remaining life he had? Unthinkable. Kakashi gulps down the sake in his cup, a disturbingly bitter taste clouds his senses for a few moments before he rises to his feet, he one eye catching Sakura's. He doesn't really want to look at her, not in this situation where he's conscious that whatever may be showing through his eye, it most definitely _isn't_ the right thing here,

"Thank you for telling me Sakura," He slips his vest over his shoulders and tugs on his _zori_, just as he pulls open her door, he knows that he shouldn't be leaving like this, but he doesn't think it can wait, "Thank you, Sakura and… I'm sorry," She looks hurt and opens her mouth to say something but he's already gone.

He shouldn't have left like that, but it simply _cannot_ wait: he needs to see Tsunade.


	19. Chapter 19

I'm sorry if the mission was a bit of a let-down… Would some fluff make it up to you? …Probably not…

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_19. Cryptic At Best_

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><p>Sakura was partially surprised at Kakashi's abrupt departure the day before, she had desperately hoped that he wouldn't see her as little more than a common murderer. There was a tiny part glad that he left so abruptly, she certainly wasn't looking forward to all of the awkward, accusatory questions – Sakura didn't want to think Kakashi would quite be like that, but neither did she expect him to just sit in silence.<p>

She had remained sitting on her sofa for a long time after, finishing off the sake; the cynic in her knew that Kakashi wouldn't be able to accept what had happened and go back to treating her as he always had – his knew found knowledge would damage them irreparably. She was prepared for it, but it still surprised her just how hurt she felt by his sudden departure and eventually went to bed later that evening, having not bothered to eat any dinner to slip into an uneasy and un-restful sleep.

Sakura was also aware that Tsunade may well have wanted her to take the next day off after their mission, but Sakura needed something to occupy her – sitting around with nothing at home would have only caused more pain. For Sakura, the only way to combat intrusive and unwanted emotions or thoughts was to remain busy – and the hospital was the epitome of such work. Slapping on a fake smile, she wanders into the hospital for close to half seven in the morning and plans on remaining there until she'll have no option but to fall into a deep, dead sleep once she returns home. Firstly, she checks the rota for rounds or recovering patients and then, as there is very little she can do immediately (for the nurses who have just started their shifts, as well, were seeing to the patients held overnight).

Sakura, having closed the door to her office (she is tempted to lock it, knowing that some of the elder medics don't think they need to bother with such pleasantries for the younger generation, irrespective of her position or skill. She doesn't mind for emergencies, but when it's just laziness for the sake of, 'oh, what did you do with that patient file again?' It's quite infuriating). She slides down into her desk chair, knowing that today and probably every other day for a very long time, will be long and stressful; maybe it wouldn't be so bad if she were allowed some restbite – just to be numb to everything for a little while would make it all more bearable.

But, of course, the world does not work in such terms. Even if it did, she still doubts that she's _earned_ any rest.

Digging around for a pen and a scroll, she begins her mission medic's report, Sakura hates, _hates_ paperwork, but she has to admit occasionally, that it can be suitably numbing when she doesn't want to have to analyze and put on a brave face and laugh at jokes which aren't funny. At least the report, albeit painful and shaming, merely accepts what's written and allows her to loose herself for a little while; the sea of kanji, foaming in waves but all somehow precisely ordered with a tone something rustic and unfinished. Sakura, were she to be in a more relaxed or less disheartened mood may have found it an enjoyable source of meditation.

Unfortunately, for now she is merely looking for as much work to occupy her as possible and the next task would be thinking of a way to hand in her mission report without a dressing down from Tsunade. Damn, she really should have gotten her tempter under control. _Too late now..._ She thinks grimly, _somehow it's always 'too late', the beauty of hindsight, eh?_ She rises to her feet, her report now finished (_damn it for being so short_) and walks out to begin her rounds, most of whom are shinobi recovering from serious but relatively localized injuries – one had a horrifically shattered arm, which took several healings before it remotely resembled normal.

The unfortunate Jounin had spent days cooped up in hospital and today, should, in theory, be his last healing and would be allowed to be released. She pads near silently down the halls, he is pleasant man and quite old for a shinobi, but he'll never admit it – although Sakura can only hope that he will be filled with his usual awkward silence.

The very last thing Sakura can bear now is a bout of uncharacteristic chattiness from a random patient.

_Way_ too quickly, for Sakura's liking, a lunch break rolled around and she's again forced back to her office for fear of earning a plague of questions about the mission and 'what's the best way to increase your chakra control?' Or 'how come you're in today? I thought Tsunade-sama gave you the day off.' Closing her door and falling back into the seat, she is tired from the day; it has been constant work as she's been aiming for, but she didn't anticipate the weight of her feelings after Kakashi had up and left almost as soon as she'd stopped speaking.

Sighing lightly to herself, thinks that maybe lunch would be a good means to rid her mind of unwanted thoughts and yet (for different reasons other than she skipped the previous evening's dinner and had only a piece of fruit for breakfast) she cannot find the energy nor will to get up off her chair. Sitting there for a few minutes, a sudden knock at the door interrupts her thoughts and forces Sakura out of her slouch and to slap on another fake smile,

"Hai?"

"Haruno-san," The door opens and in walks one of the assistants who attends the front desk, "This was brought in for you, Haruno-san… By Hatake-san," Sakura immediately snaps to attention,

"What? Kakashi? Why?" The young assistant shrugs as she places the small bag containing something solid, by the sound of it, on the table,

"I don't know, Haruno-san, but Hatake-san came by a few hours ago and made me promise that I would bring this to you at lunch time and that I not look at it. Although, of course I wouldn't have done so anyway," Sakura fixes her eyes on the bag, momentarily unable to find an immediate explanation,

"O-okay, Miiku, thank you," Sakura's eyes dart back up to the young woman as she bows slightly and leaves, closing the door behind her; Sakura gingerly reaches for the bag and lifts it, finding it to be quite light weight but with a seated bulk. Her curiosity is now the only thing that she can feel, it's long since pushed aside her sadness and restlessness. She digs inside the bag to draw out a wide, rectangular box,

"…A bento? What the hell?" She slides off the lid, eyeing the beautifully laid out box with rice, vegetables, asparagus and _is that tempura? _ Sakura thinks she spies it as she reaches into the bag to fish out the chopsticks, a flash of white catches her attention as she averts her eyes. The pink haired medic spies a small note taped to the inside of the lid (which she'd automatically turning upside down through force of habit), _that's a funny place to put a note,_ looking a little closer, it reads:

_'I heard that you're a fan of tempura so I added extra in… I wonder what other foods you like..?' _

Although Sakura pauses in attempt to decipher the note, nothing makes obvious sense and the all-too-tempting scent of lunch wafting up just under her nose is too much to resist as her hunger returns with a vengeance. Whatever it means, she can think over it later, her mood somehow now drastically improved; a single thought crosses Sakura's mind as she clamps her chopsticks around a deliciously fleshy bit of tempura;

Those three words really do sum Kakashi up: _cryptic at best_.


	20. Chapter 20

Sorry if this isn't quite as exciting or tension filled again, but things take time and it will soon warm up!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_20. Searching Through The Day and Into The Night._

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><p>Kakashi, generally known for his sneakiness, had very little trouble locating an adequate spot from which to observe (unseen himself, of course) the entrance to the hospital and, hence, a certain pink-haired employee leaving, when the time came. He wasn't entirely sure what shift she would be on – he'd left so abruptly the day before and spent the rest of the evening mulling over the information – that he hadn't time to prepare his stake-out to check her shift from the early morning. Although he'd received a positive reaction, signifying her presence there, when he dropped off his gift – he could only hope that it would be well received.<p>

The Sakura he knew would likely have been furious with him, but she was probably still feeling worse for wear – he'd have to apologise. That was, at least, the premise of his current position, although he is accompanied by his copy of _Icha Icha Tactics_; Kakashi really is hoping he can make use of a few choice words and that would at least demonstrate the fact he hadn't meant her any harm or ill will – but rather, a sudden urgency had overcome him which would not wait for pleasantries.

It had taken him quite a while to fully accept everything that Sakura had told him – some of which he'd shamefully missed during her telling of events but had analysed it all as he lay in bed, without having to pretend he was actually reading – which would have been the case were he in public.

Slowly fitting it all together, along with some of the details he gleaned from Tsunade (such as exactly _what_ punishment Renshi got for leaving a vulnerable Sakura behind – a few teamwork related, very nasty training sessions with Ibiki and three months of D rank missions, but beyond that, all word and knowledge of what had happened stayed between Tsunade, Renshi and Sakura – and now Kakashi. Apparently Tsunade wasn't too pleased to hear that Asuka had somehow gotten hold of some information about it, but that was by the by.) but Kakashi eventually made peace with everything he'd learned. It shocked him to realize just how different Sakura is from the woman in his head and just how mature she is now – that she'd made a decision and did what she thought was right.

Kakashi hadn't asked or even hinted at what might have happened to Sakura after they returned, he wasn't sure he wanted to know – the Godaime was nothing if not judicious in reprimands deserved. Maybe a little _too_ judicious if she felt the underlying problem could turn out to be dire if left unchecked, so he has no doubts that Sakura will have faced _something_ for her actions – even if they were for the good of the team and Konoha. However, Kakashi noted very carefully, the evening last, that he hadn't lost any respect for Sakura nor did-_does_ he feel any differently towards the Kuniochi – if anything, his respect has grown a little. Sakura had told him that she would explain the mission and that is exactly what she did, carefully and as thoroughly as she was able, despite knowing that could potentially have gone wrong.

Kakashi gives an involuntary shudder at the thought of how so many would, doubtlessly look at her and see just a cold-blooded killer if they knew what had transpired; and then she would never recover. The silver-haired Jounin was determined not allow that to happen (his old desire to get a real smile from her still stands) and to that end, he is certain that treating her much as he always had… Well not quite to the degree he had in her Genin days or Chuunin days but as an adult, a woman and a respected shinobi of the leaf. Spotting a flash of pink, he pauses to observe her, she looks tired from the day, but not devastated; Kakashi can only hope that her mood is the result of his leaving last night did not cause her as much pain as he supposed, or that the lunch did the trick.

Leaping away, although keeping his stealth at the highest level, he tails the Kuniochi home and invites himself in before she is there to do the honours for him. He places himself in her small kitchenette, leaning on the counter, he lowers his chakra and patiently waits for her to make her way up the flights of stairs to her home. He can sense her chakra outside the door and the key twist in the lock as she steps inside, kicking her sandals off first before looking up and pausing when meets his one visible eye,

"K-Kakashi, what are you doing here?" He stands up a little, turning to face her, making sure to keep his movements careful and deliberate, he takes a few steps closer to her so that she's now within arm's reach,

"I want to apologize for yesterday, Sakura," He can see her dismiss his words with both a wave of her hand and an internal slamming of the door,

"I-it's fine, Kakashi, it doesn't matter, really,"

"Sakura… I promised you that I would not lose another to such circumstances as my father… Although, I apologize for my abrupt departure, I really could have handled it better; I had to speak to Tsunade-sama and I genuinely thought it couldn't wait, but I know that I may have inadvertently made you feel worse in the process. I certainly do not think any less of you nor do I see you as anything less than a Jounin medic," Kakashi bore his eye straight into Sakura's pair of green ones, his words didn't lack any sincerity but apparently, Sakura couldn't or wouldn't accept them anyway, she slowly shakes her head slightly and averts her eyes from his,

"I told you, it's fine, you really don't have to worry," She tries to side step him but Kakashi's quick to prevent her, sending out an arm, it both blocks her path and encircles her, tugging her back to his chest as his other hand finds her mid back, tucking her right under his chin. She feels more slender than she looks, she offers no resistance although he can feel the tension in her and he guesses that he is acting a little strangely. He isn't even sure why he is doing it, but a part of him feels regret at his distance the day previous and so has to make up for it by being extra close today. Besides, she fits quite well to him and he isn't half as uncomfortable as he might have anticipated.

"I can't tell you whether I think you did the right thing or the wrong thing, but as a direct result of your actions, you saved two shinobi and prevented the enemy from gaining any information on Konoha. You did what you thought was right, that's enough," She doesn't say anything for a moment and he let's go, Sakura steps right back away from him to again create a comfortable distance of a few feet between them. Apparently she's as uncomfortable with invading personal space in such a fashion as he is – at least he won't be expected to dish out any more of those when he'd rather not.

"Ok, Kakashi, thank you," She offers a half-hearted (and only half fake) smile as she meets his gaze and he sends back one of his own broad smiles, "What did you want to speak to Tsunade-sama about?"

"Hmm? Oh, just some things… Are you coming to tomorrow's training session?" He eyes her carefully as she gives a tiny frown, no doubt in trying to think of a reasonable way to say 'no', "Remember what happened the last time you tried to refuse," He pushes, albeit gently as Sakura shoots him a very unimpressed look, apparently not appreciating his coercion tactics. With a sigh, she agrees,

"Hai, hai… what time?"

"Eight o'clock,"

"So about half-eleven, then?"

"At _eight_ o'clock, in the _morning_," He corrects, secretly pleased at her response, _yes, Sakura-chan isn't all that far away_, but he knows as well, that he'll have to be careful to make sure that she doesn't pull one over on him and create a better mask than before.

Next objective: get rid of those fake smiles; it should be a little easier to find her with some of the weight taken off of her shoulders.


	21. Chapter 21

A-ha, I thought it was about time for some light relief, although you might want to take it with a pinch of salt… A pretty big pinch… :D It just seemed like quite a Naruto thing to say ^^

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_21. It's No Stranger To You And Me_

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><p>Kakashi appeared at the training grounds at 08.27 am of the day after, he wasn't <em>entirely<em> sure what prompted his uncharacteristic bout of punctuality, but a part of him suspected that he didn't want to keep Sakura waiting for too long – or else she would more readily close herself off whenever he tried to get just a little closer. He needed to give her something to make sure that the game would be still open. His actions also, apparently, completely floored both Naruto and Sakura – the blonde immediately asked who'd died and Sakura seemed to regard him with a deep and uneasy suspicion; Sai, of course, was as passive as ever,

"What? Is it really so unusual for me to be this early?"

"Yes," Both the pink and blonde responded at the same time – Kakashi was forced to resist the urge to smile,  
>"Hmm, would you believe me if I told you that I punched my alarm clock in my sleep and changed the time accidentally?"<p>

"No," Naruto folded his arms as he too began to regard the Copy Nin with some suspicion,

"Kakashi-sensei, this really isn't like you at all, what's happened? What's going on?" Kakashi sighed over dramatically,

"Can't you let an old man age gracefully?"

"Oh yes! I read about that the aging process tends to be a sore spot, especially for men; the book suggests that the best way to avoid offending the individual, is to politely ignore it," Kakashi's shoulder slumped heavily down as he sweat dropped slightly,

"Mou, Kakashi, I didn't think you were _that_ old… Although it might well explain why you were so tense,"

"Sakura…" Kakashi rounded on the Kuniochi, a playfully hurt tone lacing his voice,

"Hey, wait a minute," Naruto's voice cut right across them, "If Kakashi-sensei really _is_ getting old, how will we know when his hair turns grey?" Sakura only just managed to bite back a laugh fast enough, although Kakashi could hear a light snort barely escaping, Kakashi slumped even more an aura of melancholy falsely being projected, although internally, he could feel a small thrill of victory – that he was closer to his objective with Sakura than he had been for weeks. It would only take careful furthering and he will have accomplished his task – she was the most tangible she'd been for weeks.

"Well, we really should get on with training… How about we pair off and spar? Sai and Sakura and Naruto with myself," Kakashi knew what would happen if he left them to their own devices, Naruto would chose Sai and Kakashi wanted Sakura to feel as though she still has space even if they were physically close by, that he wouldn't be permanently breathing down her neck.

Even if that was (and had been for the past few weeks) precisely what he'd been doing, but Sakura was still something of a mystery to him and all his questions hadn't quite been satisfied yet – Kakashi did know, however, that if he was overbearing and forced her into a corner, he would only scupper himself and his objectives – he hadn't practiced the art of patience for years to fall at a hurdle such as this.

With mutual grumbling, Sakura and Naruto (accompanied by Sai and Kakashi) wandered away to begin their sparring sessions Kakashi pausing momentarily to place his book into his pouch as he wanted to both fully concentrate on Naruto (he'd need to) but also to keep an eye on Sakura. His attention swiftly diverted by Naruto who came sailing in aiming a punch for the Copy-Nin's face; a fruitless attack against the elder male, but he now knows better than to underestimate the blonde, his tactical ability is certainly not to be scoffed at.

The years on Kakashi – although occasionally nag at him, disliking the idea of becoming an old man – give him a grace and fluidity nearly without parallel and once which Naruto couldn't keep up with. Although, of course the younger had alternative ways to beat him, should it eventually play out that way; Kakashi would usually emerge as the victor but Naruto could certainly give him a run for his money.

Just as Kakashi ducked out of the way of another of Naruto's attacks as well as destroying a kage bunshin, he takes the opportunity to flash his eyes over to Sakura and Sai, the former of which was currently coiled up by a large inky snake. The medic however halted her movements altogether and the ink creature suddenly seemed to shatter; the Kuniochi was crouched and sprang at Sai in an instant, a chakra loaded fist aiming for her. Kakashi's attention is forced away once again to evade another of Naruto's attacks, (kunais connected by wire with kibakufuda) but _sliver_-hair was satisfied that she completely focussed on her fight.

She definitely wasn't on the outside, that time; perhaps lifting some weight off her shoulders was enough to shift the deadbolt from the door.

Kakashi retained a touch of suspicion – didn't it all seem so easy? Kakashi knew from personal experience that just by speaking of one's pain, it doesn't necessarily mean that the status-quo has changed – is Sakura again fooling him? Kick flows to a punch to destroy a kage bunshin and forms the seals for a doton to hide himself beneath ground, preparing his final attack upon Naruto. His timing, as impeccable as ever, Kakashi bursts from the ground, surprising Naruto as he coils the wire in his hard around the younger boy's chest. Placing a knee to his back and a kunai to his throat, the elder male is satisfied he isn't quite so past-it today,

"I win," Kakashi paused a moment, so as to prove his point before rising to his feet and freeing the blonde from the wire, who was already grumbling, both averted their eyes to the fight next to them, just in time to see Sakura being released from Sai's blade edge. Seemingly without noticing the other two both Sai and Sakura turned to each other and bowed, as they rose back up they both smiled at each other – both _such fake_ smiles. They were literally nothing more than a tensing of the group of muscles controlling the lips; Kakashi was near mesmerized by the ugly, meaningless smiles.

How could the sensitive and empathetic Sakura desire to be anything like the cold and unfeeling Sai?

As soon as they'd had their meaningless just-for-show exchange, they'd turned back to face the other half of their group and Kakashi realized just how distant he'd been as Naruto was already in front of Sai and Sakura, chatting away.

"…We can fight, right now!"

"Alright… We'll call it here for today," Naruto spins around to face his previous sparring partner,

"But we've only just started, Kakashi-sensei!" He's right, but the same sense of urgency is tugging at Kakashi's sleeve and he cannot ignore it any longer,

"Well… You guys can continue if you want but I'm not keeping you here… Sakura… Do you have a few minutes?" The Kuniochi eyed him for a moment or two before nodding and walking the short distance over to him, the male Jounin immediately whipped out his book and began to walk away as Sakura caught up and fell into line beside him,

"Kakashi? What did you want?" She was looking at him, with her eyebrows raised for the question,

"I'm a little hungry… Do you feel like getting some dango?" Her eyebrows immediately snapped into a frown as she eyed him up and down,

"Are you feeling alright?"

"Of course not," Sakura's busy eyebrows now twitched into expressing concern, as Kakashi met her gaze, "I just told you, I'm hungry," He grinned as Sakura's expression again changed and she sighed lightly, shaking her head, "Well? Will you join me?" Sakura's wheels around to meet his gaze, her suspicion still strong, "Please, Sakura-chan?"

"Fine," She sounds as reluctant as she looks, but Kakashi cheerfully ignores it, all steps are good steps here and that accursed _Sai-like-smile_ is nearly too much to bear.


	22. Chapter 22

I hope Kakashi doesn't seem out of character for this chapter… I tried to keep him as close as I could whilst still having him say what he needed too…

Also: The last two chapters were sort of build up to this one and I really couldn't think of an adequate way around except for this way, so I hope the last two chapters were too annoying or 'filler-like'.

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_22. You Can Wipe Off That Grin, I Know Where You've Been_

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><p>Kakashi is especially pleased to discover that the small shop is quite deserted and he and Sakura are able to find a quiet corner, well away from anyone else. Himself taking the seat with his back to the wall and Sakura taking the one opposite him, albeit somewhat tentatively – Kakashi can't necessarily blame her but it does cause a secondary problem of how the hell he is supposed to broach the topic he wants to discuss. A waiter appears and both order tea but neither order any food,<p>

"I thought you were hungry,"

"Not for food,"

"Oh?" Kakashi nods as he finally replaces his book back into his pouch and turning his attention fully on the slightly younger woman in front of him, seeming to surprise her somewhat,

"Why are you here, Kakashi? Why did you ask me to join you for some hypothetical dango?" He decides to be as round-about with his question skirting as usual, although he will answer – in an obscure and hidden sort of way,

"I'm curious, what was it like to spar with Sai? Did he possess a strange sort of passion I sometimes glimpse when he's in perfect timing with Naruto, or was it more like fighting a machine?" Sakura cocks her head and observes him owlishly for a moment or two,

"Why do you want to know?"

"It's bad form to answer another's question with your own,"

"I've just finished one spar, Kakashi, I'm not much in the mood for another,"

"An enemy wouldn't offer you any restbite,"

"Are you my enemy?" _No, Sakura-chan, that couldn't be further from the truth_,

"Of course not, I'm just curious about you… Such as your impression of Sai as a sparring partner,"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You are my friend but it's recently occurred to me just how little I know about you," The suspicion is back and so is the waiter, their tea arrives and she takes the opportunity to hide behind it,

"This is very unlike you Kakashi, it all seems so…" _Strange? Convenient? Unlikely? _"… Seems as though you're trying too hard with something…" In a sense that is exactly what's he's doing; "Besides you never really cared before… Even when you asked directly… There's nothing I want from you based on pity,"

"I wasn't planning on ever doing that; I would have thought you know me better than that,"

"I don't think I know you at all," She grumbles, averting her eyes to the floor beside her, as Kakashi keeps his eye trained on her,

"Exactly, what do you know about me?"

"Only what you choose to imply," _Good answer_, Kakashi thinks maybe, if he genuinely wants to find a little more out about her, that he'll have to give a little too,

"Maybe I feel a little guilty," She meets his gaze again, pondering for a moment,

"About what, exactly?"

"Not bothering as much as I should have before now," He forces his expression completely neutral, but somehow he can't help but feel she can still see right through him,

"Mmh… And would you feel less guilty if I wasn't as successful as I am now? If I'd given it all up and become a civilian?"

"No..." How could he possibly answer a question like that?

"As if you didn't already have your hands full with Naruto and Sasuke,"

"A teacher's role is to recognise and nurture a student's potential,"

"Kakashi, there wasn't a human being alive who expected more of me than what I was back then,"

"_Don't!_ Don't say that...That isn't fair," Kakashi averts his eye back down to his tea – when did he become the comforted instead of the comforter? _How did she suddenly take the lead out from under him whilst they're still in the middle of a song?_

They prolong the silence a little longer as Sakura raises the up to her lips and she seems not to be focussing on anything; she suddenly meets his eye again and offers him a _hideous, fake excuse_ for a smile,

"I suppose Sai did feel a lot like I was fighting a machine-"

"_Don't!_ Don't offer me that fake smile," His voice is more venomous than he initially intends, but he can't say it doesn't reflect the truth, she's immediately wary,

"Wha…"

"Don't bother to smile at all if it isn't going to be genuine," Again, it is something else he could well have thought to handle better, but it's been irritating him for far too long; "We already have one Sai on the team, we don't need another,"

"What's to say I'm even a part of the 'team'? My old status still stands and just because I attended today, it does not mean that I'm suddenly _Sakura-Chan_ again, who's right back where she started_,_" Her eyes were full of defiance,

"It doesn't matter how far you go, you will always be a part of Team 7 and _we_ want you to join us for missions and training sessions… I can appreciate you reluctance and that your experiences have changed you, although you aren't any less 'Sakura'… But you'll start to loose what you merely _think_ you have left to salvage if you keep up smiling for the sake of making other think nothing's up."

"I'm to assume that you're an expert with this?" She downs the last of her tea, "So is that why you wear a mask? You got bored of having to fake smile at everyone so you just slap on a mask and then you don't have to bother?" He can feel his one visible eye narrowing against his will,

"Sakura, you know what I mean..."

"Do I? Did you consider that there is a reason my smiles are…less than genuine?"

"Of course, but the more use the fakes the less likely it will be that you'll ever use a real one,"

"Kakashi… I'm not even sure why you care…"

"You were my only Kuniochi student; I care about your wellbeing,"

"What does that even mean, 'that I was your only female student'? And why? It's not like you're responsible for us anymore… You haven't been for the better part of a decade," Kakashi isn't sure if she's grasping at straws or whether she genuinely cannot understand that he cares simply because he does, not because of a sense of obligation but he has a nasty sinking feeling that the latter is the case,

"Sakura… After everything that you went through, that we went through as Team 7 with Sasuke, with the Fourth Ninja World War, the invasion of Pein… I've never seen you like this, not even close… Then you go out on a mission with another team which nearly destroys you and seems to steal something of yourself away from you… Can you honestly not believe that I care what has happened and what will happen to you? Do you honest believe that Naruto cares because of a sense of obligation rather than the fact he loves you?"

Kakashi has his eye very carefully trained on the Kuniochi in front of him, desperately reading every tiny signal she gives off, for a moment wishing he could swallow her up in a hug again, a part of him sensing it would be far more effective than any words he could speak. He's almost surprised at how difficult she is to read with her mask on and eyes averted, she abruptly finds her feet, locks her cold, hard eyes to Kakashi's single one whilst one hands fishes in her pouch,

"Thanks for the lesson on codes, I'll be sure to remember it," She allows a note of money to flutter down and is gone before it comes to rest upon the table top, Kakashi feels a momentary rush to get up and give chase, but his intuition knows it will only cause more trouble. They both need time to digest what's happened in the past… _fifteen minutes? Is that all?_

If he were alone, he would give out a low, disheartened sigh, but the company around him dictates his finer actions and so pulls out his book and gulps down his tea before leaving his own money on the table and leaving decidedly more slowly that his female "companion" he stuffs his free hand in his pocket as he wanders slowly away, berating himself again for his uncontrolled actions around the woman and again hurting her.

It was something else he should have handled better, a step backwards for the two he'd taken forward and another opportunity _missed. _


	23. Chapter 23

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_23. Don't Give Up, Keep Running, Keep Hiding _

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><p>Sakura, although in theory too old for games, feels unable to help playing the one she's currently occupying herself with; it has been roughly three weeks since the incident with Kakashi at the dango shop. She had guessed (and was later informed by eves dropping on Genma talking to Gai) that Kakashi had been sent out on a mission the day after they'd last spoken; although she'd failed to catch when he was expected back (although his general punctuality would still render that slice of information moot) Sakura suspected that it wouldn't be long.<p>

Tsunade was more concerned than she let on about the general states of all members involved in the last mission she'd undertaken (along with Genma and Raidou to provide back up for Team Kakashi) and hence, Sakura expected that she would have sent Kakashi on a relatively short term 'quick and dirty' mission which wouldn't leave him too drained. The pink-haired Kuniochi's suspicions turned out to be correct and she'd spotted him back in the village a few days ago.

Miraculously, he wasn't injured or incapacitated through use of his sharingan and looked, instead, like he needed one very large, hot meal and many hours of uninterrupted sleep. She carefully avoided him after ascertaining that he wasn't in need of medical attention (one of the few advantages she had over him for knowing him for so long, in conjunction with her now well-trained medic's eye, is that she can spot an injury on him from a mile away).

Sakura knows that she can't avoid him forever – and there is an irrepressible part of her that doesn't _want_ to avoid him for long – but the stronger part of her doesn't know what to say to him. Her intuition tells her that he is correct and that she can't hide behind a fake forever but her stubborn self found a lot of what he had to say difficult to accept, unsure if a part of her felt somehow betrayed by Naruto again seeming not to notice much at her absences.

Or that he's formed a stronger bond with Sai than her in half the time she'd known him; she knew it was silly for her to feel like that and she knew she was probably grasping at straws and looking for a way to justify how she felt when there really wasn't an easy or obvious explanation to herself.

Hence, she wasn't ready to face Kakashi and have him ask more difficult questions, she wanted to apologise for leaving rather rudely when they spoke last – he's been good to stick close and aim her help her as he has done thus far – but what would she say? Knowing him, he won't allow her to gently skirt around the issue, he'll ask the hardest questions and expect honest answers – and he would be right to do so but Sakura doesn't fully understand why she's suddenly so apprehensive of facing him. Deciding that she'd analyse later precisely _why_ she didn't want to face him, she darted away and kept the lowest profile she possibly could (even going so far as to use a henge then suppress what chakra she could) and has, subsequently, managed to avoid all contact with the silver-haired Jounin.

He should be at least impressed that she's managed it for so long.

Sakura, on an exceptionally rare day off is making her way back to her home after having taken a walk (her training session and shower had already been done but was still too restless to sit in her apartment reading). Keeping her senses wide open and her chakra supressed she moves stealthily – even when she can't sense Kakashi around, he wasn't albeit rudely, referred to as a 'sneaky bastard' without good reason. Sakura moves tentatively, and could sense another presence close to her as she quickly darts away and deciding that a crowd of people will be a little easier to hide in.

Disappearing in a small blur of pink, she doesn't immediately sense the presence follow her but she knows better than to assume she's lost him so easily; she slips diminutively into a throng of random civilians. Walking slowly and doing her best not to attract any attention to herself, she weaves through the people, all of whom are doing what they seemed to do best: standing around for no reason getting in the way. Although it served her purpose today, it generally annoys her enough to take to the rooftops, but-_Kakashi! Quick!_

"Sakura," _Damn it,_

"Kakashi" She nods and immediately ducks behind another civilian with the intention of walking away, but he is still stood right in her path, the same as he was before, with one hand in his pocket and another by his side, he looking as stern and stoic as ever,

"Do you have a few minutes, Sakura? There are a few things I'd like to talk about," His voice was as perfectly even and unthreatening as ever, but it still unnerves the Kuniochi, she does her best to look the least suspicious as possible (although that probably somehow meant she looks incredibly suspicious).

"Uh, sorry, I haven't actually, I'm in a bit of a hurry so it'll have to be another time," _Like never_, "Sorry, Kakashi," She immediately disappears without giving the male time to agree, argue or even form a response; reappearing in her apartment she sinks down onto the little futon immediately sighing. Suddenly running into him in such a fashion had found her far less prepared than she'd anticipated; silently agreeing to herself that she'll have to work a lot harder to avoid him from now on, she walks towards her bathroom hoping a hot shower would help her to feel a little calmer.

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><p>Thirty-one hours and four more avoidances of Kakashi later, Sakura was close to feeling worn out; if he hadn't suspected foul play before, he sure as hell does now; each and every time, she didn't allow him to get more than a sentence out. Sakura half curses her bad luck (and, obviously, his knowledge of her schedule at the hospital for that day) and her stupid …<em>thing<em>.

It started out as a mere apprehension, something not unusual or unhealthy in and of itself, but the fact that she'd gone three weeks without seeing hide nor hair of him and then giving in to instinct and avoided him the first time, only allowed it to escalate. She's being silly and all she needs to do is pluck up the courage, march over to his apartment and apologise to him – she did owe him one, after all, but somehow everything was now incredibly silly and stupid and Sakura can no longer find the courage to face her old sensei.

Definitely a new low.

She is still in her office, even at the end of her shift, knowing that Kakashi won't be far behind, he's no doubt sick of the games as she is; but she knows too, that the longer she lingers, the more likely she is to get lumbered with a pile of work – and the medic is _starving_. Sighing heavily to herself, she clenches her fists, picks up her small bag and steps out of her office, tugging the door shut behind her; walking carefully but silently down the halls, she makes it quickly to the entrance and bids a pleasant good-night to two women at the front desk. Stepping out into the early evening air, she takes a deep breath and walks away towards her modest home; if she really wanted to avoid him, she should take to the rooftops but the atmosphere is so relaxing that she can't bring herself to hurry such a delightful journey.

"Nice evening, isn't it?" His low, but familiar voice interrupts her thoughts as she freezes, the instinct to drop everything and run surprisingly strong, _still!_

"I suppose," He appears in front of her, staring down with an unreadable and unchallengeable expression,

"Sakura, I _need_ to talk to you," She nods, taking an automatic step back at his proximity,

"I know, it's just…" She trails off as she turns around but is met only with three swirling tomoe and all the blood seems to rush to her head before she irresistibly blacks out and crumples into his awaiting arms.


	24. Chapter 24

I'm sorry it took so long for me to finish this chapter, I had a bit of writers' block half way through... I hope this chapter is okay, I know its not the most exciting one I've written but it is important for the relationship between Kakashi and Sakura (and I can't exactly have Sakura tell Kaka what happend and the *bing* she's suddenly fine and dandy, but she _will_ be happier form here on out). Sorry if all of this is annoying you guys...

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_24. A Level-Headed Man Is Good To Find_

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><p>Kakashi leans on the door frame of where his tiny kitchen connects to his little sitting room-bedroom arrangement he's already taken off his sandals, haitai-ate and flak jacket; Sakura is still unconscious, lying on his sofa; her hands have been carefully bound so that she cannot make seals. The rope itself is chakra enhanced too, just to makes sure; although he has the sharingan at his disposal to knock her out again, this is something that needs to be talked out. A part of him wishes that he could just turn his back on all of this and say he doesn't care and leave Sakura to her own devices, but he can't.<p>

He _does_ care and he's in too deep to walk away without an answer or a conclusion.

Sakura's been out for about an hour, he'd only used a simple and harmless genjutsu to send her into a deep sleep, she'll no doubt be groggy when she wakes up, but… well, she shouldn't have avoided him for so long. He observes her carefully from his vantage point, she's still quite deeply asleep and he silently ponders her for a little while – _why was she avoiding me so? Was I too forceful when we met last? Oh well_… He could see her beginning to stir and he walked a few paces closer to where he was stood right next to her, ready pull her up to a seated position when she's awake enough,

"Ugn…" Her eyes flutter open and Kakashi slips one hand beneath her right upper arm and his other clamps around her left, gently lifting her to an upright, seated position, "Hu-wha? Kakashi?" He could easily see the confusion clearing from her eyes as she blinked a few times and recognised that she where and _how_ she is,

"Sakura, we need to talk,"

"K-Kakashi, what the hell? Let me go!" She struggles against her bonds as Kakashi stands in front of her, on the far side of the small coffee table with his arms folded. He doesn't want to scare her, but he doesn't want her not to take him seriously either,

"Sakura-"

"Kakashi, let me go, what the hell is this?"

"You've been avoiding me. Sakura, you can curse me to hell and back and hate me if you like, but you will listen to me first," He made sure to keep his voice stern and as absolute as he was able but without allowing any threat to creep into his voice, he wanted her to respect his immediate wishes, not fear them;

"But, Kakashi!"

"Sakura! You will listen to what I have to say, then I will release you and you can leave and never speak to me again if you so wish, but I will not play this game any longer." She opens her mouth again, the fiery blaze in her eyes threatens to set the room alight but she holds her tongue, snapping her mouth closed again with an audible click. She fixes her eyes on him – daring him to come out with something trivial and nonsensical as usual, like he was held up for saying a prayer for a dead koi;

"I'm sorry if I pushed too hard when we were in the dango shop… I didn't mean to tell you how to live your life," He unfolds his arms and sighs gently, regretting the palpable, antagonistic tension in the air – _when did it get like this? _If only he could tell precisely which button he pressed; "I don't fully understand everything that's going on with you, how could I? I wasn't on that mission and neither am I you, but from what you have told me, I am _better_ able to understand you," The fiery blaze of hell seems to dampen a little and the Kuniochi appears to be listening to him, genuinely _listening_; her eyebrows nit together signifying that he still needs to be a little clearer.

"I'm worried about you,"

"W-what?" Sakura looks completely muddled, "What do you mean?"

"What do you think it means? I'm worried that you aren't making any effort to come to terms with your past and that you're allowing yourself to coast along unchanging – not adapting to the difficulty you've faced and it's _that_… more than the missions themselves which tend to destroy shinobi… I don't want to see that happen to you, Sakura," His hands are resting on his hips as he makes sure to keep as constant eye contact as he can, the pink haired woman averts her eyes at the end of his sentence and suddenly finds his floor somewhat of interest, Kakashi can almost sense her argument on the tip of her tongue.

He wishes, just for a moment, that he could switch places with her and see why she's so resistant and make her realise why he cares.

"Do you understand me, Sakura?" His voice is tentative, not at all like him, "I've seen so _many_ shinobi fall… I promised you that I wouldn't let that happen to you but I can only _support _you, you must still put the work in," He takes a step closer and another although she still doesn't look up, he's stood adjacent to her as he lowers himself into the seat; he's still at full attention ready to leap into action at less than a moment's notice;

"I… I understand what you're saying, but I don't understand how I can change it..." Her eyes finally meet his, "But how can I just go back to how my life was and pretend that everything's okay? And that I'm alright?" Her eyes avert again but the pain in them isn't hidden from him, "How could I possibly betray his memory like that?"

No, she doesn't really want to be like Sai. She only immediately desires it because being emotionless is so much less painful that coping with the feelings.

He knows this well. _Too_ well.

"You don't… But there are other ways you can honour his memory; a good way would be to begin _living_ again," She pauses a moment before again meeting his eye, her look is guarded and he can't fully read it,

"Isn't that… _convenient?_"

"No. I know that you won't forget Keisuke, neither will Renshi… And so long as the two of you remember him whilst living _your_ lives to the fullest, protecting Konoha and strengthening her, you will be honouring his memory. It isn't easy and I'm _still _coming to terms with those whom I lost… those who I _caused_ the loss of," For the first time since the conversation began, Kakashi averts his own eye down to the table, "Keisuke willingly gave his life to save two shinobi and Konoha, not only was his death not in vain, but it was also _accepted_ by him; Sakura, you are not a cold-blooded killer – you had an impossible choice to make, that's all." She looks like she wants to argue but again restrains herself, Kakashi shifts closer until he's barely a foot away, although still seated on the adjacent seat,

"You won't run away if I release you, will you?" She pauses for a moment but shakes her head,

"No,"

"Good," He sends one hand back to pull out a kunai from his pouch as his right hand finds her shoulder to hold her steady, a sharp flick of his wrist and her hands are free. She lifts then around to her front making no other movement, as her eyes refuse to meet his,

"I'm half way through cooking dinner, will you join me?" Her eyes flash to him as she gives him a dubious look, but she doesn't immediately reject him, "Small steps, Sakura; besides, it's the least I could do after hypnotising you," His voice is disarmingly frivolous but he knows she won't have missed the thoughtful meaning to his words,

"Why?"

"Don't worry, it's not dango, this time, and I've said what I needed too, for now, on this subject," He is dead serious as Sakura sighs lightly, "You are my equal, Sakura, not my student and only very occasionally were you my subordinate teammate, although I hope the entire Team 7 can again go on missions… But, for tonight, enjoy not having to cook," He smiles again as Sakura takes on a playfully suspicious expression,

"What makes you think I usually cook?" Kakashi raises to his feet but turns back to look at her,

"Please, Sakura, your skill as a medic – combined with your slightly obsessive personality – means that you couldn't possibly be anything less than religious about cooking proper meals," He turns to walk away, but just in time to catch her incredulous expression but he silently grins to himself infinitely pleased that no matter what the subject matter is, they always find a way to slip right back into their appropriate roles.

They aren't strangers. Sakura, it seems, just seems to give Kakashi far more reason to be curious than he's used to; it's alien for him to desire to be so involved with another's business, but he just _cannot_ turn his back on her.

Thankfully, Sakura is the sort who can accept such behaviour in him.


	25. Chapter 25

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_25. Surreptitious_

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><p>Kakashi saunters up the steps with his book out and his gait completely relaxed, he twists around the other shinobi in the corridor before eventually reaching a natural halt outside her door, knocking swiftly he enters upon hearing a response,<p>

"What time do you call this?" Tsunade perches her elbows on the desk in front of her as rests her chin on her clasped hands, her expression unreadable but a clear undertone of displeasure hadn't bothered to be hidden;

"Uhh…Twenty to four, Hokage-sama?"

"Mmhmm, and precisely what time did you ask to see me?"

"Ah, at half eleven…" Tsunade sighs heavily as she averts her eyes from him in frustration, "Ahaha, my apologies, Hokage-sama, you see as I was leaving my apartment this morning, I happened upon-"

"Save it, Kakashi, just get on with why you're here," She returns her gaze to him as he clears his throat, (thankful he at least bothered to pocket his book before he entered, he really does need Tsunade's cooperation);

"I've been speaking with Sakura recently, and although she's still a little… _down_ I think she's making good progress,"

"…But?"

"I am concerned that her day-to-day of hospital shifts punctuated by me forcing her to attend Team 7 training sessions is hurting as much as it's helping,"

"How so?"

"I think that she's right back into her normal, _un-dangerous_ routine makes her feel more guilty."  
>"You're aware that Keisuke died quite some time ago?"<p>

"Yes, but now that I know, the status-quo has been changed and I'm pushing for her to transform out of the the way she'd learned to cope with it initially and I think forcing her out of her comfort zone in other ways – which are removed enough from Keisuke-san and Renshi-san would prove beneficial," Tsunade eyes the shinobi in front of her, she knows Kakashi cares deeply for his teammates and has Sakura's best interests at heart; true as well that Kakashi is someone the Hokage has great personal respect for, but he's no medic.

So he must be speaking from personal experience, the Godaime knows Kakashi's past well and that it was Obito's death which drove him to join the ANBU. Maybe an easy mission with her old team would be of benefit to her, Kami knows that if Naruto and Kakashi couldn't cheer up Sakura between them then there really will be no hope for the girl.

But what sort of mission would be appropriate?

"Alright, Kakashi, Team 7 can have a mission… A semi-long term one perhaps would be best, a couple of weeks, maybe," The Hokage begins to rifle through the scrolls, but nothing immediately springs to mind, "Well, I'll look into it and let you know before the end of the week. Thank you, Kakashi,"

"Hokage-sama… You know, when I first noticed that Sakura was looking a little… _worse for wear_, I wondered why no one else seemed to care," Tsunade gives him a wry smile,

"Please, Kakashi, as Hokage, her shishou and as a medic myself, there's very little about Sakura which slips by me… But you can't heal someone who doesn't want it. You have to make her _want _to get better for any improvement can be made,"

"I'm aware, Hokage-sama,"

"Dismissed,"

* * *

><p>"Oi, Naruto," Kakashi's voice easily cuts through the gentle hum of the people around them,<p>

"Mmphf?" The younger male responds, through a mouthful of noodles, as the half-turns in the direction of his old sensei's voice just as said shinobi appears next to him taking a seat at the stool, "Oh, Kakashi-sensei are you here for lunch?" The mischievous grin on the blonde tells Kakashi that he cares whether he's eating for the opportunity it presents; resisting the urge to roll his eyes at the younger's never ending quest to see his face, he responds:

"No, I just came here to tell you that we have a mission, it'll be approximately two or three weeks long; we need to escort one of the Daimyo's sons and a few of his advisors to the Earth Country, where he'll be getting married,"

"Wow, cool!" Naruto's eyes immediately sparkling, "I've never been to Earth Country, will be get to see the Hidden village there?"

"Iwagakure? No, the Daimyo of the Earth Country lives far outside of the shinobi village, we will be heading much further north on from Iwa," Naruto nods and takes another slurp of noodles, "Sakura will be joining us for this mission too, will you find her and let her know?"

"Whoa! For real? Sakura's coming too?" Kakashi nods, pleased that the younger male looks so happy at the prospect of her re-joining the team,

"That's right, will you let her know the mission details and that we'll be meeting at the gates, along with Sai, tomorrow morning at half-seven – we're to head to the Daimyo's residence first to collect his son and then the mission will begin as we escort him to his wedding," Naruto nods enthusiastically, as Kakashi finds his feet, "Unfortunately, there are a few last minute things I need to organize, so would you mind finding both Sakura and Sai?"

"Sure, Kakashi-sensei, no problem,"

"Great! Well, I'll see you tomorrow morning, then," Said sensei then promptly disappears in a puff of smoke (as is his typical style) leaving a still munching Naruto and a grumbling Teuchi – annoyed that the man took up a bar stool but didn't buy anything.

Eventually, Naruto rises to his feet, his hunger finally satiated and ambles away with the intention to find Sakura, he thinks that the hospital will probably be the first place to find her, his feet easily carrying him towards the building. Entering the building he immediately turns to the two people at the desk,

"Hi, is Sakura here?"

"Haruno Sakura? Sorry no, she's just finished her shift – she left about two minutes ago,"

"Oh, okay then, thanks," He grins and dashes away, his eyes scanning over the streets as he takes to the roof tops, it isn't too long before he spots a pink head of hair and leaps down to her side,

"Hey, Sakura-chan,"

"Eh? Naruto?" He grins as they come to a halt and the Kuniochi looks at him expectantly,

"Kakashi-sensei asked me to find you, we have a mission tomorrow to escort the Daimyo's son to his wedding somewhere in the Earth Country, Kakashi-sensei said it will take a few weeks," He'd already started to step away before he'd finished speaking, "Meet at the main gate at half-seven tomorrow,"

"Hey, wait, Naruto, why am I being made to join?" He shrugs,

"I dunno, but I'm glad you're coming with us, Sakura-chan – see ya, I gotta go find Sai," He's runs off, waving behind him,

"But, wait… Naruto!" But he's already gone, sighing heavily, closes her eyes in frustration, "I bet this is either one of Tsunade-shishou's or Kakashi's supposedly bright ideas…" She turns back and continues to walk the remaining distance to her apartment, wondering why the _hell_ she's needed to for an easy mission like this or, if it was some idea of Kakashi's what could possibly be the reason for it.


	26. Chapter 26

Ooh, a change here, title is taken from _Read My Mind_ by The Killers... I'm sorry if I seem to be a slave to scene setting...

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_26. The Restless Heart, The Honest Man_

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><p>"Kakashi! <em>Finally!<em> What took you so long?" He laughs nervously and scratches the back of his head,

"Well, you see-"

"Ah, save it, and answer instead why the hell I'm supposed to come with you on this mission," Her hands are on her hips and her face twitched into a scowl, even though there's a pack on her back and she's in her typical clothes ready for a mission,  
>"Well, we have to escort the Daimyo's son to his wedding and we wouldn't want him to become injured or ill,"<p>

"A likely story, what's going to happen to him? A bug in his eye?"

"Sakura! That can be an extremely uncomfortable affliction… It's his wedding and an important political function, it's imperative that he arrives well and uninjured," Kakashi diverts his attention from the now grumbling Kuniochi to the two remaining teammates, "Are both of you ready to leave? Good, let's go then," They all leap away Sakura following last, Kakashi isn't quite happy with the arrangement but decided to let it slide – he's already pissed her off once today – doing so again would be of absolutely no benefit.

They run for several hours (the Daimyo's current residence is, rather irritatingly in the south-easternly corner of the Fire Country and as such, they had to travel for four and a half hours (at _their_ top speed, which was probably something like six or seven times the rate they'd manage with the Daimyo's son and convoy) before they would even being their mission). No doubt they'd make it half-way back up to Tanzaku Gai by the end of the day – if they were lucky; Kakashi sighs heavily (albeit internally, he _does_ have an image to keep up) as the realization finally hits him at just how long the mission really will be.

For Kakashi, there is little more tedious (other than monitoring small children) at having to escort purposefully slow royalty over extended distances. For the rough distance he'd been given at where the wedding was to take place, he – and the rest of Team 7 – could make the journey just inside a week (and that was assuming that they'd face no serious, delaying threats). With the rate of travel he'd expect from a carriage and a sizable convoy travelling, the same journey could well take more than twice the time. Hopefully, at least, this mission would give Sakura something else to focus on and a sufficient change of scenery enough to take her mind off the day-to-day.

"Kakashi," Sakura suddenly falls into step next to him,

"Hmm?"

"Why am I really being brought on this mission? It's highly unlikely you're going to face any major threat – it's not even like the Five Great Nations have much in the way of enemies between each other… It's nothing that you guys can't handle even _if_ you were to run into trouble," Kakashi eyes the Kuniochi beside him,

"I know, but this wedding _is_ important, it's crucial for Fire and Earth to solidify their alliance with each other and if the Daimyo's son arrives and is unfit to wed anyone, they'll treat it as a sign of something deeper… Besides, it's nice to be on a mission which isn't battle orientated for once, isn't it?" He did his best to put a smile into his voice but Sakura's lips merely pursed into a wavery line – as though she knew he wasn't telling the truth but didn't want to say so outright.

"Why don't you take this as an opportunity to relax on an easy mission like this, as you say, we're unlikely to run into much trouble," He makes eye contact this time and her eyes are glowing with suspicion, but there's a playful twinge,

"I can't say I like what you're trying to do, but I suppose I don't have much choice," He grins to himself,

"That's the spirit, Sakura," She rolls her eyes and darts away a little, putting some distance between them, he's fine with this, crowding her in – much like annoying her – tend to end badly and this mission is to get her to relax – and, with any luck, open up a little. They continued to run and before long, Naruto's shrill voice alerted them,

"Ano-san, ano-san, we're here!" Kakashi slowed his pace and landed next to Naruto,

"Ah," He stepped forward towards the guards present, "Konnichiwa, we are shinobi of the Leaf here to chaperone the Daimyo-sama's son and escort to the Earth Country for his wedding," Kakashi spoke clearly, politely and plainly – he really couldn't have gotten his point across any more succinctly:

"Ah… Your names, please?"

"I am Hatake Kakashi and these are my subordinates; Uzumaki Naruto," He points to the blonde, who is almost leering over the elder male's shoulder, "Haruno Sakura and Sai." He gestures to the remaining pair of shinobi, the guard eyes each carefully for a few moments before diverting his attention back to Kakashi,  
>"Please remain here whilst we alert the Daimyo-sama," Kakashi nods as his three subordinates step up next to him and they eye the complex – Naruto with slightly starry eyes and Sakura with a far more subtle, but equally awed expression. Kakashi chuckles to himself, remembering how awed <em>he<em> felt when first assigned an escort mission to the Daimyo – it's of a grandeur all on its own.

"Hatake-san, the Daimyo-sama awaits you," They follow the guard through the first set of doors and into a courtyard where the sizable convoy waits – five carriages were held, and numerous servants all fussing around them. Seemingly endless boxes and chests were being loaded onto the carriages,  
>"Hatake-san, this way please, your subordinates may remain here," Kakashi nods and turns back to them,<p>

"Remain here and take a note of what everyone is doing, we'll rendezvous in a little while," They all nod and turn their attentions back to the convoy, their eyes carefully but subtly analyzing what they can see.

He returns a short time later with who is presumably the Daimyo's son, who follows a few steps behind Kakashi as he walks over to the last of his team,

"This is the Daimyo-sama's son, Hiro-sama." Kakashi then turns back to address the royal "And these are my teammates, Haruno Sakura, Uzumaki Naruto and Sai," They each bow in turn,

"It is pleasant to meet you," Sakura steps forward, catching his attention,

"Hiro-sama, I am a medic, if you have any illness or complains, please do not hesitate to let me know," He eyes her carefully for a few minutes

"Thank you, Sakura-san," She steps back and Kakashi steps in,

"Well, Hiro-sama, if you are ready we should get going," He looks over to the shinobi, he's older than Naruto, Sakura and Sai – late thirties by the look of it, deep blue eyes and short-ish, black hair; handsome enough – seems agreeable too,

"Hai, Kakashi-kun, I am ready to leave. Please alert Ken-san of our departure," Kakashi nods as he turns back to the group, catching Sakura biting her lip in what seems to be an attempt to prevent herself from laughing – although Kakashi isn't too impressed,  
>"Sakura…"<p>

"Hai?" Her voice wavers slightly, trying to keep her laughter in check as Kakashi shoots her an unimpressed look, no doubt saying something along the lines of _'you dare laugh at me and you can have the entire night watch,_'

"Why don't you go and speak to Ken-san, he's the man over there in the purple robe, and let him know that we're ready to depart," She nods swiftly, trying to hide the mirth in her eyes although it seems that Kakashi can still easily see it, although thinks better of bringing it up here, "Then I want you to remain by Hiro-sama's carriage as we travel,"

"…Hai, Kakashi-kun," Her words were extremely quiet and not quite loud enough to be heard by the others although the silver-haired Jounin internally grimaces, he _hates_ that damn suffix;

"Naruto, I want you to remain at the back of the convoy and watch what's going on behind us and Sai I want you to take point, use your ink animals to scout ahead when you feel it necessary,"

"Hai,"

"I'll be on the left hand side of the covey and Sakura on the right, closest to Hiro-sama's carriage. I'm not expecting too much trouble, but keep your eyes open for opportunists."

"Understood, Kakashi-Taichou,"

"Hai, Kakashi-sensei!"

"Alright, let's go,"


	27. Chapter 27

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_27. Eyes That Fail To See_

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><p>They'd been travelling for some days, the air was hot and dusty but not quite so bad as to be dire. It was a little <em>too<em> hot for Sakura's tastes but it wasn't unmanageable, made easier, as well, for the fact that she was left to her own devises – without Kakashi breathing down her neck or Naruto chattering in her ear (or Sai's creepy attempts at smiles). She was able to relax and enjoy the scenery of the Fire country she was usually forced to rush through at break-neck speed; allowing a yawn to escape she continued to walk next to the carriage although there were still several meters between them, it occurred to her that maybe she really would be able to relax on this mission.

She hadn't previously realized how dense the forest is in this part of Fire, they were about (according to Kakashi) three days from the Kusa [Grass] border which was no doubt where, if at all, they'll face trouble. It's mid-afternoon and Sakura was sure that they'll be on the look-out for either an adequate campsite or an inn. The latter being startlingly unlikely as the road they were travelling on was quite deserted – the major routes in Fire were now towards Suna or to the Lightening Country.

Earth was slowly coming around and greater trade was being opened up but it still remained that the …_less than friendly_ nations between them such as Kusa or the country housing Takigakure [Hidden Waterfall]. Although there was nothing overtly hostile, it still wasn't completely safe to travel through them and any shinobi clearly from one of the five great nations was likely to face trouble.

Still, they posed relatively little threat for the Great Copy Nin, Uzumaki Naruto or Sai. Or Haruno Sakura.

Eventually, as the evening light was beginning to get ever darker and they were forced to stop, Kakashi wasn't happy that they hadn't managed to find anywhere which would enable them to pull off the road and hide in such a fashion. The best they managed was where the road merely widened to where they had enough space to park the caravans and make camp on the far side of them, next to the tree line. The officials and Hiro didn't seem all that impressed at the prospect of having to sleep out in the open, but by the time they'd started a fire and realized how much warmer it was besides the flames, their complaints dwindled – a little.

There were two fires, to keep everybody warm, team Kakashi and the coach drivers were around one and the officials and Hiro the other. There wasn't much distance between them and it was more of a practical measure to make sure everyone go the benefit of it – although Sakura suspected, in looking at the facial expressions of some of the other advisors, that they deemed it appropriate they should sit and eat separately. As the water boiled over the fire, Kakashi crouched next to Sakura and opposite Sai (Naruto was sat between the latter two),

"We'll take our usual shifts, does anyone have any preference for order?"

"I'll go first," Kakashi nodded at Sakura's request and Naruto and Sai each responded respectively,

"Okay, you'll each need to make a few rounds of the campsite as we're covering a large area and we don't want anything to happen to Hiro-sama, the advisors, the coachmen or the horses – and obviously there is still personal property to be looked after," Everyone nodded, as Sai stirred the water (which currently was cooking for the sake of noodles) Sakura couldn't help but feel quite comfortable sat around with Kakashi and Naruto again – she realized that she missed being out in the open with those guys.

"Sakura, as you're taking first watch, I want you to keep an eye open for everyone's actions – including all of the advisors, Hiro and the coach drivers – just as we're all preparing the turn in. Keep your eyes open for anything which seems a little out of the ordinary," Kakashi spoke with a low voice and his immediate attention seemingly elsewhere and Sakura knows to make it look as though he isn't speaking at all, he's sat at a ¾ angle a foot or so from Sakura with most of his back or side to everyone besides the team, but even so he isn't a man to relax caution,

"Of course… What do you suspect?" She sipped from her small cup of tea, its warming properties making Sakura endlessly grateful;

"I'm not sure yet, it might well be nothing but I just get an uneasy feeling; I can't pinpoint it and I'm relatively certain that nothing will happen whilst we're travelling I can't shake my gut feeling. Just keep your eyes open for anything else which strikes you as odd; it might well be nothing,"

"Don't worry, I'll keep my eyes open and report to you if anything seems even a little off,"

"Good," Kakashi flashes her a reassuring smile – a favoured trick of his when his team (mostly Team 7 it seems) is especially cooperative or seems to grasp the gist of a situation.

"Kakashi and the Hag seem to have a very good relationship, despite the Hag's prolonged absence," Both the silver-hair and the pink-haired shinobi turned their attentions from each other to the very pale man sat opposite them – a creep smile well in place already,

"What?" Sakura momentarily forgetting his less than savoury name for her, "What the hell?" Sai nodded,

"That's right, the books I read suggest that only close friends are able to suffer a prolonged absence from each other but act as though they have never been separated when reunited. The book says that only the closest of friends or perhaps those who feel romantic love for each other tend to be able to over come this," Sai looked as calm as ever whilst Sakura chocked on her tea, Naruto burst out in riotous laughter and the widening of Kakashi's one visible eye signified that he was shocked at Sai's assumption, at Sakura's recovery and angry,  
>"What the <em>hell-!<em>"

"Uh, Sai," Kakashi is quick to cut across, one of Sakura's raging tirades would not help here, "I think you're reading too much into this, Sakura and I have spoken much more often than you might assume from out training sessions; so our… err… _absence _is much less than you'd think," Kakashi tried to explain but he could feel a sense of dread that it wasn't going to be understood; Sai merely smiled and nodded again,

"Yes, I am aware that you've been spending time at her apartment and she at yours," Kakashi really was tempted to burst into laughter at how easily situations can be misinterpreted – and Sakura's expression which didn't know whether to be livid or embarrassed – but he wisely assumed that laugher here would do him no good,

"That was for medical purposes – I had been suffering with tense muscles,"

"Repressed feelings can be a source of tension," Sai countered passively although it didn't seem to be appreciated as the cup in Sakura's grip shattered,

"Sai you think too much; I've known Kakashi for more than a decade, of course I'd be comfortable with him," Kakashi rose to his feet, and stepped away,

"I'm going to check on Hiro-sama, please prepare for bed soon," Kakashi walked off as Sakura rolled her eyes at Sai, who immediately began to dish out some bowls of ramen. _Repressed feelings! God damnit! The next spar we have, I'm gonna make sure to nail Sai with a super chakra-punch! Feelings! Romantic love, who the hell screwed Sai's head on? Danzou, right._

_Stupid. Absolutely stupid, feelings for Kakashi or he for me couldn't be stupider, Sai has _way_ too much left to realize about the complexity of human emotion. _

_Stupid boy, he's just making overgeneralizations. Definitely._


	28. Chapter 28

I can't believe what a monster this story has grown into! Lol, it was only meant to be little a 10 or so chapter thing and now I'm looking at three times that plus lol! Damn my attachment to some stories... Oh well, as long as you guys enjoy it... :D

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_28. A Snake In The Grass_

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><p>They'd pushed hard, and reached the Kusa [Grass] border quicker than expected and the journey had been quite smooth – there hadn't been any rainfall in the area for a few days so their movements were more swift than anticipated. As they neared the border, Kakashi had warned them they day before that he and Naruto would switch so that Kakashi could oversee the border crossing and Naruto would ensure Hiro stayed unharmed.<p>

Nothing more had been mentioned about Sai's assumptions and it, thankfully, seemed to have been taken in god humour as just another one of Sai's misunderstandings. The days had been relatively uneventful with just the narrow roads and thick forest; they hadn't encountered any trouble whatsoever, not even a sniff – or a sign of anyone. Sakura wasn't entirely sure whether to count this as a blessing of fortune (in some respects) or as a sign that something more sinister was brewing – either way, she kept her vigilance and hoped that whatever it was bothering Kakashi about the convoy, would rear its head soon.

Kakashi could see the border not too far up ahead and took the opportunity to leap up ahead to the front of the procession and relieve Naruto, who jumped back next to Hiro's carriage. It had all previously been organized (as well as various fees to be paid as demanded by Grass) but Kakashi wasn't about to assume that it would be that easy – Kusa seemed to have a chip on its shoulder about every single other nation – especially the Five Great Nations. Kakashi held out his hand to bring the carriages to a halt before he stepped forward, his left hand poised for a kunai if necessary. Although there was no formal border division, the respective counties tended to run regular border patrols and Kakashi had no doubt that one would make itself known very shortly.

* * *

><p>"Umm… Sakura-chan?" The pink-haired Kuniochi turned to spot Naruto leaping over Hiro's carriage and landing beside her,<p>

"Naruto! Get back over to the other side, Kakashi will kill you if he finds you here!"

"I know, but… There's something I wanted to ask you," Sakura sighed lightly, but nodded,

"Okay, but be quick,"

"Um… Well, I've been wondering about what Sai said…" _Oh Kami, please don't tell me…_ "...And do you have feelings for Kakashi-sensei? Are you guys dating or something?"

"Naruto…" Sakura almost couldn't be bothered to give him the punch he so richly deserved – she so much wished that her words to Sai had been the last of it; she'd foolishly thought that Naruto had only found the idea funny but stopped listening to eat. She and Kakashi certainly hadn't acted any differently to each other than usual…

"I know, Sakura-chan, I know and I just wanted to say that…it's okay," Naruto was furiously waving his hands in front of him (no doubt expecting to get a beating for his words),

"W-what?" She fixed him with an incredulous look, not quite believing his implication,

"I'm saying that it's okay, I completely trust Kakashi-sensei – he's a good guy and I know he'd treat you right!" Sakura could only stare at him with wide eyes, her mouth opening and closing without a sound escaping still not able to believe what the _hell_ he was thinking, although someone beat her to the punch, (even though her fists were already clenched ready to greet Naruto);

"Naruto!" The deep, stern voice of their mission leader drew both of their attentions, "Why aren't you at your post? Get to the front of the convoy and remain vigilant!" Kakashi landed right in front of them just as he finished speaking, he wasn't _angry_ per se, but both the blonde and the Kuniochi knew Kakashi was in such a mood that trifling with him – or if Naruto tired any of his obstinacy, the Copy Nin _wouldn't _stand for it; "And keep your eyes open, Grass aren't exactly friendly,"

"H-hai, sorry Kakashi-sensei," Naruto immediately leaped away as Kakashi too turned to jump over Hiro's carriage and take his initial position. Sakura was thankful that she didn't end up making eye contact with the Jounin – for she was sure that she'd somehow give away what they'd discussed.

That is, if he hadn't already overheard: _Kuso! _She rolled her eyes even though a tiny, amused smile found its way to her face; it was sweet, in a fairly bizarre kind of way that Naruto had thought so far ahead – she assumed that Naruto's first thoughts would be to slap Kakashi with accusations and threats along the lines of "how dare you" and "pervert".

Nonetheless, Sakura shook her head and decided that if it took any more thinking about, then she would do so later.

* * *

><p>Just as Kakashi stepped to the left hand side of the convoy to check for Naruto's position (after he'd organized the border crossing) and after spotting that he was nowhere in sight – and silently cursed the blonde idiot – someone <em>else<em> thanked their remarkable good fortune. Just as the Copy Nin leapt away, he stole the short distance between the tree-line and the first carriage, jumping up onto the small platform where the driver was sat,

"Oi, it's my turn, clear off." He voice was hushed and he was crouched low but the initial driver seemed unfazed by him,

"Yea, yea, you won't get away with this," He spoke whilst rising to his feet and allowing the stranger to take his place as he hung on the side preparing to jump off, "Sharingan Kakashi and Uzumaki Naruto? Tsunade-hime's apprentice? You're mad,"

"Get lost before _you're _the reason it fails," The man shrugged and leapt away, disappearing into the tree line, "And don't refer to that slug woman as 'hime'," He whispered to himself as an afterthought just as Naruto appeared from around the right hand side of the carriage, and trotting along in front of it, his hand punching the air,

"Yosh! If you think you can beat us, Grass, just try it – you're no match for Uzumaki Naruto!" The man in the carriage smirked at his back (along with two sets of exasperated sighs from Kakashi and Sakura,) as they continued on, no one seemingly the wiser as the brief but potentially lethal exchange which had just taken place.

Kakashi kept easily up with Hiro's carriage as he couldn't resist a small smirk at both Naruto's assumption and his words – apparent all hadn't quite been forgotten yet. As bizarre as the situation was, it was a good sign to the silver-haired shinobi that Naruto apparently was not only mature enough to give thought to what Sakura might be feeling (as weird as that sounded in his own head) but also that he now ranked a little higher in Naruto's estimation – to be a least beyond 'pervert'. Resisting the urge to roll his eyes at how a silly sentence from Sai had managed to escalate to an assumption that he and Sakura were more than teammates. _Ridiculous… They hadn't been spending _that_ much time with each other had they? It didn't feel like it_...

Nonetheless, Kakashi _was_ pleased at Sakura's reaction to Naruto's words – it seemed far more like _typical Sakura_, the sort of reaction he would have expected from her (although with a good dose of maturity thrown in) as he might have anticipated at 16 or so. _Definitely a good sign_, usually, the quickest way to assess someone's personality change is to find a way to embarrass them and observe change in their responses; but now, it seemed, that whilst Naruto –as typical – unintentionally embarrassed her, the Kuniochi's reaction was precisely what he'd expect for _Sakura-chan_.

_I wonder who next will start of the assumptions about us? How much more can they push Sakura before they earn the punch they've been vying for? _Regardless, it will provide him with some entertainment and on a boring mission such as this, he won't waste the opportunity.


	29. Chapter 29

Ooh, this is a pretty long one, eh?

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_29. Shadows Are On The Ground_

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><p>Grass was an exceptionally narrow Country (at least in comparison to Fire) and it shouldn't take them too much more than a day to completely cross over into Earth Country and from there on, their troubles should be reduced to a minimum. However, Kakashi cheerfully stated, Kusa was the most hostile territory to cross and as their land is so small, their attacks are likely to be more savage.<p>

Most of the Nobles paled at this, Kakashi exuded nothing but confidence that they would be able to handle anything which could possibly crop up. The forest of Fire quickly gave way, the further they got from the border, to vast, flat expanses of plains, although the grasses, however, grew tall and were an easy four or five feet in height (even though they tended to curve over a little). Sakura found it something of a revelation to be crossing such a vast expanse at the leisurely pace; she was unused to such terrain as well as moving so boldly through it – it seemed to go against every shinobi instinct she possessed.

Nevertheless, their first few hours were relatively un-stressful – they passed a number of peasants and farmers on their way but all of whom looked nervous at the sight of the convoy and quickly hurried on their way. As the morning gave slowly to afternoon, so the sun gave way to deep, heavy rain clouds which promised imminent rain; for as far as Sakura could see, there was no cover for the impending downpour other than the grass itself – or the carriages. Thank _Kami-sama_ she'd thought to wrap her spare changes of clothes in plastic before she left Konoha.

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><p>The knot in Kakashi's gut was twisting again, telling him that whatever it was that wasn't right, it would make itself known very shortly. He wasn't sure how anyone could hide themselves in the grass without him knowing about them, nonetheless, he kept pace, as did his three teammates and he'd have to trust that they were just as prepared as he for an attack. He wasn't too happy about the looming rainclouds, either – not only were they heavy and packed with rain, but the slight breeze in the air would be strong enough to encourage the downpour.<p>

It grated on Kakashi too, that they were upwind, and any enemies who may be following or hiding to their sides would remain undetected. Kakashi was just about to open his mouth and issue orders to Sai when a crash and shouts of the front of convoy alerted him; leaping ahead, he just caught sight of the horse, which was pulling the cart, bolting as though it feared for its very life.

"Naruto, get the horse,"

"Hai," The blonde sprinted off after the horse as Kakashi turned to the man still sat awkwardly on the cart,

"What happened?"

"I-I don't know, the restraints must have snapped-"  
>"I expect an honest answer, what happened?"<p>

"I told you-" Kakashi flashed a kunai in front of the man,

"These straps were cut and unless you can offer me the person who did it, I'm holding you responsible," Kakashi did have more to say but he was cut off by several simultaneous events: a clash of kunai off to his right, where Sakura should be, the clouds finally giving in and the rain came plummeting to earth as well as a sebon shooting towards him which he deflected with his kunai.

Stepping back, the man on the coach leapt to his feet with a sebon clenched in his fist preparing to attack Kakashi – but the Jounin was much too fast, and took out the offending 'coach driver' before he could so much as blink. Scanning the area, he found the centre of attack was mostly around Hiro's carriage although Sai was defending well the side Kakashi had vacated; leaping up on top of the carriages, he kept low to observe the fighting. Sakura was holding her own although Kakashi could see some of their assailants, all of whom wore Kusa haitai-ates, were holding what looked to be small pouches of gunpowder.

Kakashi, pulled a kunai and a length of wire from his pouch as he used the rain to his advantage and leapt in to the confusion, looping the wire around the shinobi holding the gunpowder, he yanked back and pulled his away from Sakura.

"Don't let anyone get a direct attack on Hiro's carriage," He directed to the Kuniochi despite his full attention still being on the enemy in front of him,

"Understood," Sakura, sending a chakra loaded punch straight to the face of one of the enemies whilst her left hand, which held a kunai deflected a shuriken aimed at her. The enemy shinobi weren't nearly as skilled as she might have predicted but it didn't mean they couldn't cause some nasty injuries if they really wanted to. They seemed to know their limits and numbers were to their advantage; Sakura was attempting to drive them further back away from Hiro's carriage, but they weren't leaving too much room for manoeuvre.

Throwing a chakra charged punch at an enemy, she allowed him to dodge, thinking he was safe and allowed her strike to carry through to the ground and shattered it. The rain had fallen to hard and fast that instead of the rough crater which usual resulted from one of her strikes, it created more of a mud pit and some of the shinobi who were less skilled in chakra manipulation slipped in and were trapped.

Just as Sakura was preparing her next attack (a doton) she was half way through the hand seals when a shuriken, attached to a wire and a kibakufuda was thrown. It wound around her leg a few times before the shuriken deeply embedded itself into her thigh, worried at her proximity to the carriage had only time to slash at the wire freeing her from the enemy's grip before leaping away just as the kibakufuda exploded.

She'd managed to focus her chakra to her side and turn away from the blast which helped to reduce damage to a minimum as she suffered only a few minor burns and lacerations, although she could still feel the dull ache of such explosive force directed against her body. Forcing herself back to her feet, she saw Kakashi with his chidori ablaze as he finished off the last of the enemies, unfortunately of whom had one foot on the step of the carriage and was about to climb right in. As she tied to take a step forward to check on Hiro, her knee buckled from under her, the shuriken, it seemed had caused slightly more damage than she anticipated;

"Sakura, are you alright?" Kakashi appeared at her side as she threw an arm over his shoulders,

"Take me to Hiro-sama, I need to see if he's injured,"

"But-"

"I'm not badly wounded, it can wait," Kakashi wanted to protest further, but it would only waste time, his left hand grabbing the wrist over his shoulder and his right curling around her waist, he leapt up and landed in front of the ambushed carriage, easily carrying her smaller frame into it. As she slid into an uneasy seat next to Hiro, Kakashi turned to step back out into the rain, presumably to deal with the remaining, trapped, enemies, but Sakura stopped him,

"Kakashi, would you please check the remaining passengers and let me know if there are any injuries?" He nodded sharply and was soon gone, "Hiro-sama, are you injured in any way?"

"U-ugh… un… m-my shoulder," Sakura gently pried his hand away from his shoulder as she saw a kunai was deeply embedded just above where his heart would was, a fresh wave of blood accompanied the release of pressure, as Sakura took one of her own kunai to the material,

"My apologies, Hiro-sama, but I must remove some of the cloth covering the wound," He nodded weakly as Sakura cut away at the excess material, as she placed her fingertips just above the kunai on his skin, it glowed a faint green as she performed a quick check on the wound. She was very pleased to find a lack of poison and so set about removing the kunai as painlessly as possible; Hiro, it seemed, was not very squeamish – if a little sensitive to pain – as he seemed fascinated by watching his flesh slowly knit back together.

"T-that's amazing," He complemented, running a hand over where the wound had been, but was now only smooth scar-less skin,

"It was only a basic medical ninjutsu… And please rest that shoulder as much as you can for the next few days to make sure that you don't strain the muscles. Do you have any other injuries or pains?" Her tone had immediately slipped into that of her professional bedside-manner, but she was anxious to not only check for other injuries among the passengers but also to get moving and out of Kusa as fast as possible.

"N-no, Sakura-san, I'm fine, thank you," She nodded,

"Good, but I must go and check back with Kakashi," She rose to her unsteady feet, before leaning and half-stumbling out of the carriage, bowing once more before closing the door and disappearing out of sight. She was just about to open her mouth when Kakashi again appeared at her side,

"I assume Hiro-sama is alright?"

"Yes… Are there any further injuries?"

"No… Everyone is physically fine, if not a little shaken... But you, Sakura, are not,"

"I know, I'll heal it in a little while, we need to get moving again… I- I'm sorry, I allowed an attack to slip through and Hiro-sama was wounded," she averted her gaze from him,

"It's alright, his injury wasn't serious and you didn't have much option with an exploding tag stuck to you. Now, you need to heal yourself before we can go anywhere; Sai!" Said pale faced man appeared beside them, "Can you create something which will provide Sakura protection from the rain for a few moments?" Sai nodded, whipping out his ink and scroll he swiftly drew a bat which sprung up and folded itself into an umbrella, with its claws gently clamping around her shoulder as Sai placed it over her head, so that it would remain upright of its own volition.

"Thanks,"

"Can I get you anything, Saku-"

"What the hell happened here?" The brash voice of Naruto cut across the end of Kakashi's sentence, as the silver-haired Jounin sighed heavily,

"It's alright, go and see to Naruto," Kakashi offered once last smile before disappearing as Sakura lowered herself to the muddy grass and began to tug the wire which had worked its way through the skin as she'd put pressure on it by tensing the muscle. It was painful and slow to heal due to the dense musculature of her leg, but it wasn't serious and Sakura was relatively quick to be back on her feet.

"Thanks for the umbrella, Sai," She smiled as he dispelled the jutsu, she'd walked back up to the front of the precession to find Kakashi and Naruto attempted to tie the horse back into the trap so that they could continue moving,

"Are you okay now, Sakura-chan?" She nodded at Naruto who grinned sheepishly, as, it seemed, the blonde and silver-haired men completed their task,

"Alright, Sai, as you are capable of driving a trap like this, you can take on watch at the front of the procession although I'd like you to send out some ink creatures to scout ahead for about half a mile or so. Naruto, you take Sai's old position and you and I, Sakura, will resume our places next to Hiro-sama,"

"Hai,"

"Understood,"

"Hai, Kakashi-sensei," Three of the four all responded,

"Good, now let's try and get beyond the border of Earth before tonight, I don't want to spend a night in Kusa," Everyone nodded their hearty agreement and Sai climbed up onto the carriage and Naruto, Sakura and Kakashi all darted back to their places. Sai snapped the reigns and attempted to set a fast but steady pace – he too was anxious to leave Kusa behind – he could only hope, however, that the rain would not prove to have soaked the earth too much that it would force them to halt before they'd crossed the border as it still bucketed to earth.


	30. Chapter 30

Another long chapter eheh, although there was a lot to say in this one... More or less... Also: title of this chapter is a lyric from (of course Phil Collins') _Two Hearts_ record.

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_30. If You don't Put Faith In What You Believe In, It's Getting You Nowhere_

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><p>As in typical Kakashi style, the convoy reached the palace in far northern Earth three days late. Whilst every noble, advisor and the bride's family were all clucking around and shooting the shinobi occasionally dirty looks, Kakashi was strangely grateful for being a little late, for it meant that they could just get on with the wedding the next day and he and his team would be free to leave the day after.<p>

He hadn't really been looking forward to hanging around in the Daimyo's palace – there was, frankly, far too much ceremony to stand on. He was very grateful, however, that he and the rest of the team had been given beds for the nights they would be staying in and it would make a delightful change from cold, hard earth and too many people in the vicinity.

He really didn't mind sleeping out in the open when he was alone (or in a very small cell), being out under the stars did seem to give him a strange sense of calm, but that sense was nullified when there were too many people around him – especially strangers. As Kakashi waited in the room, along with Sai and Naruto (all four were to provide security for within the wedding venue), Sakura had yet to appear – they were to 'attend the wedding as guests' and in doing so mix in with the crowd and keep the peace.

To this end, Hiro's father had provided clothing for the shinobi and they were dressed – mostly, waiting for the reception to begin (the wedding itself had been just as boring as predicted but mercifully quite short).

A sudden knock at the door revealed Sakura (who'd finally finished changing) slipped into the room, her kimono was very flattering on her, it being a dark crimson with exquisite embroidery. Seeing her in such formal wear was a rarity, but not unappreciated by the company,

"W-wow," Naruto was the first to speak, although Sakura was quick to cut him off.

"Are you guys ready?"

"What took you so long, Sakura-chan?"

"Quiet!" Kakashi quickly cut across (they decided to employ the use of nick-names to help them better blend in; although no one would hear so long as they kept quiet, Naruto rarely spoke with less than a shout,)

"Sorry, K-Hikaru-sensei," Sakura sighed at Naruto's stupidity, but nonetheless ignored him,

"Sorry it took me so long, it needed, err, _altering_ slightly," Kakashi raised an eyebrow in interest as Sakura elaborated, "Oh, I wasn't going to be beating up anybody with such restricted movement, all those damn layers… But on the plus side, there were plenty of places for me to hide my kunai and shuriken," All three men immediately looked the Kuniochi carefully up and down, as though trying to imagine precisely _where_ she could be hiding countless weapons. However, the sizable vein pop on her forehead prevented further scrutiny, catching himself, Kakashi cleared his throat,

"Uh, Sakura," Kakashi spoke in a low whisper as he rose to his feet, "Didn't you have lessons on how to wear formal attire in Kuniochi class?" Sakura merely responded with a hefty roll of her eyes;

"Words cannot describe how boring that lesson was," Resisting the urge to laugh at her response, Kakashi decided to ignore it,

"Alright, let's go… And everyone, _please_ try to remain focussed," Kakashi slid the door open and they all filled out of the small room and down the hall towards the main reception. The house was spectacular in its finery and Sakura tried to remember that she had to walk slowly and diminutively – as though all of this was second nature.

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><p>...<p>

Kakashi remained generally to himself, as he observed the room, every now and then with his sharingan (from behind an adapted eye patch which allowed him to see without having to move it aside) nothing vaguely suspicious had cropped up yet. Kakashi wasn't necessarily anticipating anything to happen either, an enemy's skill would have to be great and their grudge high if they were to manage getting this far into Earth territory _and_ infiltrate a Daimyo's wedding.

Kakashi scanned the room with his natural eye looking for his teammates; Naruto was patrolling carefully, but was allowing his eye to drift all too often to the small table which contained a few trays of canapés (Kakashi had refused to allow Naruto to go and find something to eat whilst they waited for Sakura, knowing the boy would take far too long).

Sai was also drifting, but keeping his presence very diminutive and quite a few nobles hadn't noticed that he was listening in to their conversations. _And Sakura? Ah, there, she's… Getting chatted up? What?_ Kakashi paused for a moment, wondering if his eye was playing a trick on him, but Sakura was definitely stood at the far end of the hall, with a guest stood a little _too_ close chatting away with the sort of creepy smile on his face which told Kakashi _exactly_ he had planned for the evening with the pink haired woman and himself.

Sakura, it seemed, was flirting with him too, although it was subtle, her smile was gentle and her full attention was trained upon the dark blonde haired man as he spoke. Unable to resist a bolt of irritation Kakashi swiftly averted his eye and rushed it over the room again before darting back to Sakura – who was _still_ listening to the man and she was _still_ smiling at him. Opening his sharingan eye, Kakashi felt another stab of irritation that whomever she was speaking to had turned just enough that he could no longer see enough of his face to read his lips, so instead he was forced to gauge the conversation from Sakura's responses,

_'Oh! Of course, Shinji-sama, I'm so tired of never being taken seriously!' _

_'…'_

_'Oh, Orishun Ayaka,' _

_'…' _ Another pleasant, soft smile appears,

_'That is a very generous offer, Shinji-sama, your company is world-renown! B-but…How could I ever thank you?' _Kakashi's frown deepened as one of the man's hands came up and his fingertips brushed over her cheek in a very intimately suggestive gesture. Sakura blushed and averted her eyes from him for the first time and Kakashi decided that he'd seen enough; marching purposefully over towards Sakura and 'Shinji'.

The shinobi was across the room in a matter of seconds despite the restrictiveness of his own formal attire and the large numbers of occupants in the room; clapping a hand the man's shoulder (who was half way to kissing Sakura) halted all further movement from the two,

"Yes? What do you want? Can't you see I'm busy?" Shinji took his time in turning to face a now livid Copy Nin,

"Do you mind if I borrow Aya-chan for a few moments?" His voice was low and full of non-verbalized threats as his other arm extended towards Sakura; she stepped forward as Kakashi slid his hand over her shoulder and down her back until it sat comfortably around her waist with Sakura tight to him.

As they stepped away, Shinji wasn't happy at losing his prize, but indignant, it seemed, to being lied to,

"You told me you weren't married," His voice was full of contempt as Kakashi turned his head back towards him and lifting his free hand (the other still had a tight grip on Sakura) to cover his mouth as he spoke,

"She isn't, _yet_," Kakashi then flashed Shinji his disarmingly cheerful grin as he stepped away, tugging Sakura over to the door so that they could step outside. Walking away from the doors and well into the small garden, Kakashi cast a quick genjutsu to mask their voices, so that they couldn't possibly be overheard;

"What were you thinking? You let him too close!" Sakura didn't step out of his grasp to maintain the image of them as a couple _not_ having an argument; Kakashi was surprised at himself for not really wanting her to step away, out of his grip and involuntarily tightened it slightly, feeling strangely comfortable with her so close.

"I had the situation under control, that guy looked crooked from more than a mile away and I needed to know what he was up to… He's harmless, relatively, apart from a few less than honourable business deals and only wanted someone to warm his bed for the night." Sakura did her best to hide her frustration form her voice and act as though she were whispering to him,

"You still allowed him too close, any closer and he could easily have discovered your identity,"

"I was trying to gather information from him whilst looking as though I was a willing sleeping partner – to keep him at a distance would have looked suspicious," She looked up at him to find his eye averted, jaw clenched and posture stiff as if to say _'there's nothing you can say which will make me any less right,'_;

"I wasn't pleased to look up and find my partner _flirting_ in the middle of a mission,"

"Oh please! I'd hoped you'd stopped doubting my skill or professionalism by now…" Sakura sighed heavily as she turned away from him slightly, finally pulling away from him,

"I'm… sorry," Sakura looks back over her shoulder to him and offer a small but warm smile, wordlessly accepting his apology, it provides a contrast with her earlier smiles, which were _definitely fake_;

"Come on, we need to head back," Kakashi dispels the genjutsu and they step back inside, walking straight into Sai, who bows politely,

"May I congratulate the two of you?"

"Eh?" Sai smiled at both Kakashi's and Sakura's confused expression;

"On your engagement," Kakashi, relying almost entirely on his reflexes, quickly snapped his arm around Sakura's waist, preventing her from attacking the boy, as his other hand gripped her upper left arm,

"_What?_"

"Ahaha, Sai, I think you've misunderstood, _again_,"

"Is that not what you implied to the man talking to Sakura, earlier, before walking away holding her?" Kakashi sighed as Sakura struggled to contain her vein pop,

"Sai, if you ever say another word of this subject ever again, I am going to remove your tongue, as well as other appendages, _permanently_," Sai paused for a few moments, before nodding and walking away as Sakura again stepped out of Kakashi's grip (which he only relinquished once he was sure Sakura would control herself).

"Well, he _is_ getting better at understanding people," In retrospect, Kakashi _could_ have thought through his words and decided that it wasn't the best thing to say, as he was sure that he would have seen the business end of one of Sakura's chakra punches had they not been in the middle of the Daimyo's son's wedding. Near miss if ever there was one.

Thank _Kami_ for small favours.

Although he doubtlessly will have to put up with Sakura's wrath for a little while after embarrassing her again… Still, at least they only have a few hours left before the mission ends and they can return home.


	31. Chapter 31

Not quite so long today, but I think what's vital has been transmitted...

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><em>**

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_31. But There Are Some Eyes Which See It All_

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><p>Tsunade scanned the muddy group stood in her office, they didn't look like they'd suffered any injuries (although that was probably thanks to Sakura) but they <em>did<em> look as though they'd been caught in a downpour or two if the state of their clothes was to be believed.

Everyone, Tsunade was surprised to see, definitely looked a little more exhilarated – and Sakura looked like she had been pushed out of her norm and as a result, remembered what she was capable of. Smiling to herself, she directed her attention to Kakashi who look much the same as always, deciding some prodding was in order,

"Well, you all look like you've had a holiday," A suspicious tut emanated from Sakura, but Kakashi was quick to but across;

"Ah, well, there was only once incident of attack – whilst travelling through Kusa territory,"

"Was the Daimyo's son injured?"

"Hai, but it wasn't serious and Sakura was easily able to heal him… He seemed not to hold a grudge, either,"

"Hmm… Well, that's good,"

"None of you are injured, either?"

"Only I sustained an injury, Hokage-sama, but it was minor and has long since been healed,"

"Excellent. Naruto, Sai, you two are dismissed,"

"Hai," They both bowed and veritably skipped out of the door (or at least, Naruto did) and it was again soon closed,

"So… Sakura do you still feel the same about the mission now as you did before you started?" Said kuniochi could no longer contain her sigh of irritation (although it was a good deal watered down);

"No, I suppose not… Although I could have done without the excessive bouts of stupidity form our teammates," The kuniochi's exasperation couldn't have been more obvious; although, Tsunade was surprised that Kakashi chose to laugh in response to her – she _had_ expected the male to give his own short breath of irritation;

"Ahahaha, I think that was more Sai's misunderstanding rather than stupidity," Sakura shot him a pointed look,

"Well, you seemed to have fun encouraging it," Kakashi again responded with little more than a grin, infuriating her even more as she dragged her eyes off him and onto Tsunade (managing to include a roll at the same time),

"Shishou?"

"Go ahead; take a day off before resuming your usual shifts at the hospital," Sakura bowed and thanked her whilst stepping away with a small pleasantry to Kakashi before leaving and closing the door behind her.

"Well, she certainly does seem to be in higher spirits than when she left,"

"Yes, she did well on the mission and seemed to respond well to being with Naruto and Sai again… even if they did annoy her more than anything,"

"What do you mean? And what did Sakura mean by 'their stupidity'?"

"Ah, Sai – in his moments of trying to understand humanity and emotion – came to the conclusion that Sakura and I were… Uh, _together_," A single, slender blond eyebrow rose – but out of amusement or irritation he couldn't tell,

"And precisely _how_ did he come to this conclusion?"

"Well, with the time I was spending with her outside of training sessions, Sai thought that meant she and I were closer than friends," Kakashi made sure to include a sigh of exasperation although he didn't miss the wicked grin which flashed over the Godaime's face – and Kakashi didn't trust it one bit,

"Well, apparently it didn't bother you too much… Or as much as her," Kakashi internally rolled his eyes at her statement,

"To be honest, whenever Sai or Naruto made mention of it, it made her pretty angry and she seemed just like Sakura-cha – the _Sakura_ I knew again…" Kakashi was conscious that his explanation didn't necessarily make much sense, but something else was bothering him about it – and Tsunade's expression (as though she were trying to hide a smirk) wasn't helping much either.

"Hmm…Well, you said the only trouble you encountered was in Kusa, so that must mean the wedding itself ran smoothly?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes." At Tsunade's suddenly interested expression, Kakashi realized the stupidity of his response,

"What does that mean?"  
>"You know, it will be all in my report, Tsunade-sama, I could be writing it instead of wasting your time,"<p>

"I'll be expecting a report as well, but I'd like you to tell me here," Her saccharine smile was enough to make his blood run cold – maybe Naruto's idiocy was rubbing off on him, resisting a sigh, he responded with an abridged, clipped answer;

"We dressed and blended in as guested of the wedding so that we could provide a sort of body-guard service with great subtlety; spotting Sakura I thought she was a little too close to one of the other guests and in order to get her alone for a few minutes to discuss it, I thought the most effective means to doing was to pretend that we…uh, were a couple," The tenseness of her face and tiny twitch at the corners of her mouth told Kakashi that Tsunade was forcibly resisting the urge to grin like a mad-woman,

"Jealous?" Her tone was teasing but Kakashi didn't appreciate it almost as much as he didn't understand it;

"Of what?" Averting her eyes from him down to the documents in front of her, she shook her head,

"Never mind, I'll expect your report in a few days, dismissed. And good work," He nodded and left her office quickly, bristling with unspoken irritation _what the hell was Tsunade suggesting? Dear Kami, I could almost be fooled into thinking it was Sai using a henge…_ Shaking his head as he made it out onto the street, his mind began to play back the conversation between himself and the Hokage, _'jealous?_'

What was he supposed to be jealous of? That guy at the wedding? _Please, that guy was an idiot and not very good looking… he wasn't even shinobi…_ So what could Tsunade have meant? What was there to be jealous of? Yes, he felt quite irritated at how close the guy was to Sakura, but that was because they were on a mission and he could easily have discovered her true identity…

_That's right, isn't it?_

So why does he feel so on edge? Why does he feel as though he's missed something vital? And why have his feet taken him to right outside Sakura's apartment block?

Grunting at himself in irritation he turned on his heel to head to _his _apartment which is on the _opposite side_ of Konoha.


	32. Chapter 32

Yosh! Title is from _Easy Lover_ – a duet by Philip Bailey and Phil Collins , fantastic song!

_Also _– I apologize if the situation seems a little cliché but I needed an informal, neutral territory for them both and frankly, this was the most likely location (previously unused in the story) I could think of post-mission… So I'll have to ask you to roll with it... Cheers :D

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_32. Get Out Quick, 'Cause Seein' Is Believin' _

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><p>Ok, so he hadn't quite made it back to his apartment after all, he passed Genma, Anko, Kurenai and Aoba on their way to the Shushuya* for a drink and persuaded Kakashim to join them. He didn't take much persuasion after the rather stressful afternoon, he wouldn't mind a few gulps of warm sake to help settle his nerves.<p>

He ends up in the seat next to Aoba (who is next to Kurenai) and opposite Genma, himself next to Anko; Kakashi has to admit, that this isn't quite the way he envisioned spending his first evening back after the mission, but frankly, he isn't quite complaining either. If he were in _his_ apartment, he'd probably still be thinking about what the Hokage had said to him – and that, eventually, would make him stressed.

Kakashi isn't a man who likes stress – as a matter of fact, he prides himself on remaining calm in even the most dire of situations but unfortunately, the Hokage had put him (perhaps inadvertently, although knowing her, that's questionable) in a situation which he'll have to _emotionally_ solve and it's also something he tends to avoid.

Resisting the urge to groan in frustration, he decides that the bottle of sake in front of him is his best option and that relaxation before soul searching tends to yield more favorable results.

Wait, why was he even bothering again? What would even _be_ a 'favorable result'?

Sighing heavily he takes a super-speed swig of sake as he looked up to find Genma – as well as the rest of the table staring at him –

"What?"

"This is the gloomiest I've seen you for a while… What's happened?" The sebon chewing shinobi takes his own, slower glug of sake as Kakashi merely blinks at him,

"I don't know what you mean,"

"Ugh, Kakashi, you look like you've just had a hell of a dressing down from Tsunade… Or, at least, it's how I'd _imagine_ you to look if you actually cared enough about that sort of thing," Anko grins at his less than impressed expression, but before he can reply, Genma gets there,

"So is it some _other_ woman giving you trouble?" Before he can stop himself, a flash of irritation crosses his face and apparently, that said it all, without the Copy Nin even needing to speak;

"Ooh! So it _is_ woman troubles… Well, the only women you spend any significant with beside these two is either the Godaime – and I think I can be sure it ain't her – so it must be Sakura," As soon as the words left his mouth, the entire table leered at the masked shinobi, closing his eye and taking a deep breath in an effort _not_ to throw an unforgiving punch at Genma, he did his best to compose an answer.

"It's nothing like that, the last mission was just a little more… _stressful_ than I anticipated," Genma nods, looking entirely unconvinced, humming his disbelief,

"And was Sakura with you?"

"Yes, along with Sai and Naruto," Kakashi takes another swig of sake averting his eye over the room, wishing Genma would, for once, mind his own business – it was only about once in every million times that he has anything insightful (rather than annoying) to say. Unfortunately for Kakashi, apparently today is not his day as his eye falls over to the movement at the door which attracts his attention – he spots Naruto, Sai and Shikamaru – _was that Ino behind them?_

It occurs to Kakashi that if those three are here, it's possible that Sakura could be present. _But she's not much of a social butterfly – the Sakura I've come to know recently would far rather keep to herself and after this mission…_ Despite his rationalization, it didn't stop his bolt of surprise and something he can only describe as anxiety seeing her walk through the door next to Neji and Ino.

_Why is she here? Hasn't she become a little more of a recluse recently? _

"Kakashi!"

"Eh?" Anko rolls her eyes at his obliviousness,

"What happened on this mission to make you so stressed? It really isn't like you," Kakashi only offers a half-hearted shrug (as well as hoping they haven't noticed his distraction from the new patrons to the Shushuya);

"Hmm, it was just an escort for the Daimyo's son's wedding, but it was slow going with an attack as we passed through Kusa,"

"Doesn't sound too bad… Wouldn't it have meant you just had more time to read?"

"Hmm, not really… It was just quite tedious," Kakashi shrugs, unable to prevent his eye from drifting over to the table where the younger generation were sat, although his eye lingers over _her_ instead of the table as a whole. Taking another gulp of sake, he wonder _why _she was sat there, opposite Neji and next to her blonde friend – she is smiling but he can just about make out that it's one of her exceptionally well crafted _fake_ ones, but-

"Kakashi, Gai would be disappointed in you,"

"What?"

"Gai; if you were in the spring-time of love or whatever then you're supposed to be enjoying it, rather than moping here over a half-empty sake bottle,"

"It's the spring-time of youth, _youth_, not love, idiot. And as for the sake, well, who wants a top up?" Genma rolled his eyes, but didn't fail to notice his friend hadn't addressed the key point of last sentence;

"Hey, I'll have one, thanks Kakashi," Kurenai flashes a thankful grin as he nods in acknowledgement as did Aoba, silver-hair walks away (before Genma has a chance to ask) to carry himself off to the bar. Shaking his head – _Genma is the biggest idiot, I should've known he'd come out with the most outrageous lines just to get a rise out of me…_

"Neji-san, please, I'm supposed to buy Naruto and Sai's drinks – so it's no trouble to get mine at the same time, just get yours, Ino's and Shikamaru's," Kakashi can't help himself involuntary tensing at the sound of her voice almost right behind him;

"If you're sure, Sakura-san… It's been such a long time since you were last present at once of these get-togethers,"

"Yes, I suppose so…Thank you, though," Kakashi can hear the smile in her voice, but he's somehow lost the ability to decipher if it's true or false; "Oh, Kakashi, what are you doing here?" He turns around wishing, for a moment, that the barman would hurry up with his drinks,

"Just out for a drink… The same for you, I'd imagine?" She offers a tiny twitch if her lips with a nod (_too small to tell if it's fake_) but it sits no less well on her;

"Here you are, sir," Kakashi turns quickly back to collect the three bottles of sake, as well as pay the barman;

"Thanks," Offers his own half-hearted, fake smile – somehow feeling completely _unlike_ smiling – something about the situation has put him again on edge, "I'll probably see you soon for training, Sakura. Neji-kun," He nods at the blank, hollow (but somehow negative) stare the Hyuuga is giving him; stepping past, he makes his way back over to the table, unable to figure out why his mood has so quickly taken a turn for the worse – and it wasn't exactly great to begin with.

Placing the three bottles on the table, he ignores the funny look he's earning from Genma as he slides the bottle of Aoba and Kurenai each who briefly state their appreciation. Refilling his own cup of sake and downing it quickly, his eye finds her form as she and Neji make their way back to the table, _would he be feeling any better if she was heading over to _this_ table to sit and drink with _him_?_ He honestly can't answer it.

Kakashi entertains the idea for a moment that he _is_ in love, as Genma so brazenly suggested; then shouldn't he be feeling happy or positive right now? He can't be – it isn't possible – the only thing he feels right now is miserable.

It must just be fatigue from the long run home combined with an already emotionally stressful afternoon (thanks to Tsunade) and the depressant effects of alcohol are probably amplified by his empty stomach.

Throwing back another shot he pushes himself to his feet, _stupid! It isn't possible! Stupid!_

"Sorry guys, but I really need to go and get some sleep… I'll see you later, yea?" They nod, he can see a touch of concern cross Genma's face, but Kakashi can't be bothered to explain himself further and he wanders away not really caring that he's leaving behind almost a full bottle of sake – his body is protesting too loudly in fatigue and all he can focus on is falling into bed.

Shame it'll be empty when he gets there.

He doesn't allow himself to look over to her-_their_ table, although he can hear the riotous laughter of Naruto and he hates that he can see a splotch of pink in his peripheral vision, begging him to look at it. Whatever this damn bad mood he's caught himself in better have moved off by morning – or there's likely to be little left of whatever training ground he uses to vent his spleen on.

..

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*The Shushuya is like a pub in Konoha, which sells many different types of sake (including its own) with high-backed, wooden, booth-like seats, Tsunade and Jiraiya visited here before Jiraiya infiltrated Amegakure – see chapter 366 in volume 40.


	33. Chapter 33

Ok! Title: Phil Collins (obviously) with _Both Sides of The Story_;

_Important Business: _It is _Selphie108_'s birthday! Yosh! So this chapter is dedicated to her; hope you've had a quality day ^-^! Thank you for always being incredibly supportive of this story and taking the time to review (which goes for a number of you awesome folk out there :D).

I really don't thank you guys enough for how much you motivate me to regularly update and keep this story alive – _thank you!_ Never would have believed I'd go so much support for this little fic *swirly eyes*

How about an especially long update, _Selphie108_ as I'm too late for your actual birthday? (It's ridiculouly long, but there _is_ a lot to say!) It, hopefully, possess elements of fluff [_finally_]! ^-^ Well, hopefully you like this chapter - (and that Kakashi doesn't seem out of character...)

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_33. Be Sure, Before We Close Our Eyes And Walk Away From Here_

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><p>Kakashi is remarkably calm for the devastation which lies around him as he couches on the balls of his feet, elbows on his knees; his haitai-ate has been pushed up when he used his sharingan (and he hasn't yet bothered to return it). In much the same way, he's sustained a few minor injuries which he's paid no mind; a split knuckle, a sore shoulder and what could well be a strain to his lower back.<p>

(Damn his recent propensity to be so tense.)

Still, it feels good to really push himself and work out all of his frustration – his eye averts to a rather mangled tree which took the brunt of both his anger (and a few chidori). He's in a better mood than he was last night, reassuring him that the source of his bad mood had been a combination of alcohol, fatigue and a crowded room; breathing a deep sigh, he shifts to sit down completely, surprised at how fatigued he still feels.

The mission had been by no means draining – the most effort he put in was thrusting a chidori through the Kusa shinobi's chest before he could kill Hiro – but that by itself isn't even taxing enough to speed up the Copy Nin's pulse after he'd been gently walking (or lying in a tree reading). It had been tedious, yes – slow deliberate movement such as those of the convoy went completely against his instincts – but it wasn't as if they were expecting any serious trouble.

Especially not with Naruto, Sai and Sakura with him.

Involuntarily clenching his fist whilst frowning slightly, he re-opens the small (but excessively bleeding) wound; he can't for the life of him find a connection been the easy, relaxing mission and his tension. After all the missions he's done recently, the only variable he can find (which is significant) is Sakura.

But how can she, by herself, cause him so much stress? Maybe it's all the worry he's been feeling after – _no,_ _before_ – the revelation about that mission and Renshi, so it's finally caught up to him.

After all, the mission served its purpose, to get Sakura out of her daily routine –and there by her comfort zone – and stop her focusing all her energy on how bad she felt. Surely the proof of its value had been shown yesterday, by the fact that she was out with her friends?

Running his uninjured hand through his hair, he sighs again, _so what's missing? _Why doesn't he feel any better – he's served his purpose after all, initially, when he first noticed Sakura's state, months ago, he just intended to have fun trying to see beneath her carefully constructed mask.

It was little more than idle titillation back then, a good excuse to hang out with an attractive woman whilst working on a challenge at the same time (and get some free, far less invasive but delightfully relaxing massages).

But then, he didn't really know Sakura, she was just the adult version of the annoying genin who'd once been under his supervision and little more. So he trusted himself not to do anything stupid and he could enjoy the change in routine for exactly what it was: nothing major.

But that was before he realized the depth of the problem, when he finally grasped it – he still didn't feel _too_ worried, Sakura was, after all, still free as an active shinobi and there was evidence that _Sakura-chan_ was just beneath the surface, he just had to find a way to bring her out.

Of course, by then he already _had_ done something stupid; quite a few things in fact – that damn mission with Renshi, _hugging_ her? What the hell has he turned into? And that stupid wedding, why _did_ he go and interrupt them?

He should have known that Sakura wouldn't have been speaking to that guy without good reason – she was a consummate professional (especially after her recent experiences, she wouldn't have even considered acting in such a fashion).

So why had he been so doubtful of her? So angry that she was so physically close to that man – was he _really_ worried about him discovering her identity as a kuniochi? Impossible, shinobi are meant to remain invisible – appearing as nothing more than a random woman or man, even if they were – sometimes quite literally – on top of a target.

He averts his gaze up to the sky, it is fairly cloudy, with only a patch or two of blue sky peeking through – he supposes that winter is only around the corner, even if the weather is still fairly moderate.

Sighing again, he thinks it's probably best he makes his way back to his apartment to clean up; his body doesn't really want to move, however, it takes him another few minutes before he rocks up onto his feet and steps away.

Definitely pulled a muscle in his lower back, _goddamnit_ if he misses again, _kami_ knows where he'll end up.

Walking off, towards the edge of the training ground he tugs down his haitai-ate again, allowing his body to glide in the rough direction of his apartment; as he's not in the mood (or ideal condition) to be leaping from rooftop to rooftop, he chooses to take the indirect route of the roads.

Unfortunately, whoever organized Konoha, hadn't thought far enough ahead about any further development and as a result, Kakashi had to walk almost into the very center of Konoha, before he could join onto the road which would lead him towards the section of town which contained his apartment.

"_Kakashi!_" He's jolted back to the present by the shrill voice and by _whose_ voice it is;

"S-Sakura?" He looks up to see her standing, with a look of concern, a few paces in front of him; it's bizarre how strangely exposed he feels as her eyes run quickly over his form, no doubt taking in all his possible injuries;

"What happened? Why are you so beaten up?" He lifts his right arm to scratch the back of his head in mock embarrassment as a matter of course, but forcibly resists wincing from both knuckles and shoulder complaining at his rough treatment whilst they're wounded;

"Ahaha, I was just training and pushed myself a little far," She raises a single, pink eyebrow, obviously not believing him as she takes a few steps closer,

"Not a real mission unless you're injured, huh?" She offers a slight curl of her lips on one side as she meets his eye, _how is he supposed to respond to that?_ She gestures with her hand, "Come with me," She begins to walk away and there's something gentle in her tone which has him irresistibly obeying before he's even registered the words; falling into step next to her.

"It won't take me a minute to patch you up," Its small, only a gesture to him, but it's a _real_, _genuine_ smile – a beautiful one too, its neither arrogant nor saccharine, but he isn't sure if that's the reason why he can't his eye off it, or if it's because of the fact her smile _worries_ him somehow, "How's your back?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you hurt you back in training? I hope you warmed up first,"

"No, I forgot and think I've pulled a muscle," _Baka!_ Why did he say that? He should be walking away from Sakura, not providing more means to remain close – this is bad. Apparently she notices something's up too, but doesn't voice it; moments later he's toeing off his sandals as he stands, awkwardly in her apartment entrance way.

What _is_ wrong with him? He feels both reassured and uncomfortable at the same time, stood here – she brings a sense of calm to him but at the same time, he feels as though he's preparing for battle.

"Kakashi, where are you injured?" She returns from having washed her hands;

"Guess," He slaps on a fake smile – what's the point of him allowing Sakura to lead him to her apartment, only to try and annoy her into kicking him out again? _Because I've suddenly become an idiot, that's why… Or maybe it isn't so sudden – if I'd had any sense to begin with, I'd have stayed well enough alone…_ Her frown is little more than a tilt of her eyebrows – but there isn't much venom in it – perhaps she's been expecting this? Is she able to read him? A surprisingly scary thought…

"Your right shoulder and hand, you also mentioned a problem with your back, so shirt off,"

"It isn't really guessing if you already know, is it?"

"You're easy to read, Kakashi… At least, when it comes to injuries,"

"Well, for that, I'm not going to do as you ask,"

"They're injuries, Kakashi – what's the point of suffering? I want to help,"

"Nope," He would have folded his arms if they'd behave long enough to manipulate;

"I'll knock you out, if I have to,"

"Like you could," The sly smile of her face again attracted his attention again,

"Want to bet?" Her voice from behind him has him tensing – imperceptibly, of course – he turns around to see Sakura advancing on him, _when did she make a kage-bunshin? Whilst washing her hands, of course... Shit, he really _must_ be readable to her_; as curiously thrilling as it is to have two Sakura's stood either side of him, waiting to pounce, he knows it could get very dangerous (or awkward, embarrassingly so) very quickly and his choice is reduced to capitulating;

"Fine,"

"Excellent, now, shirt off and take a seat," He nods and follows her direction to one of the kitchen chairs she pulled out; he unzips his flak jacket and slips it off – which Sakura takes from his hand to hang it up, as he tugs at the hem of his shirt preparing for the difficultly of taking if off as he realized something.

He isn't wearing a separate mask and shirt today, _shit_-

"Kakashi? What's wrong?" She steps around in front of him as she notices the problem, "Oh… Hmm, I could find you a scarf if you like…" He can tell by the hesitancy in her voice, that she isn't sure how to help, although he's touched that she is willing to go so far to respect his privacy.

Before he even registers it, his left hand has already found and removed his haitai-ate and places it on the table; leaning forward slightly, his hand grips his shirt at his upper back and he yanks it off. Sakura pulls on the ends, sliding it off and out of his hands.

He's surprised that her eyes are averted to the floor; if he is willing to show her, why isn't she willing to look?

"Do you have any leg or hip injuries?"

"No," He's forgotten how much more crisp his voice sounds without the mask in the way,

"Turn around, please, it'll be easier if you sit backwards on the chair," He nods first, but then grunts in acknowledgement realizing she can't' see his head move; lowering himself onto the seat, with his forearms – somewhat painfully – resting upon the high back of the chair, which in turn, he rests his chin upon.

He relaxes as soon as he can feel her warm fingertips on his back; he doesn't know why she didn't look, but he feels almost unexplainably less disturbed as a result.

"Allow your right arm to hang by your side," He complies, surprised by his state of relaxation as he can feel her chakra sooth and heal his shoulder, the pain slowly fading; he can feel the body warmth emanating from her as she stands close behind him and it occurs to him just how intimate this feels – something he hasn't noticed before.

Although it isn't nearly as alarming or uncomfortable as he's experienced in the past – he's _content_ somehow.

"What injury did you sustain to your hand? Are you able to take off your glove?" The best he can muster is a sleepy sort of 'mmh', but lifts his right arm, relishing the ease of movement whilst he tugs at the black cloth; he reveals his now slightly swollen and blood stained knuckles.

He lifts it up to a right angle next to his ear as she grips his wrist and lower hand gently, he hears her slightly gasp as her chakra again seeps in and begins to mend his hand,

"If you'd struck just a little harder, you would have shattered the phalange – it is so unlike you to lose control of a strike like this and even now, with your mask… Kakashi, is something wrong?"

"…No,"

"You seem to have been very busy lately with missions and… Uh, my problems I suppose… When was the last time you took a break?"

"Sakura, please… It's fine," He can hear her exhale a little heavier than normal accompanied by a light 'hmm,' signalling she isn't satisfied by his answer, but won't push any further. She lets go of his wrist abruptly and he flexes his hand, marvelling at how quickly she's returned it to normal;

"Careful, go easy on that hand for a few days or you could reinjure it,"

"Hai,"

"Did you say you had another injury on you back?"

"Hai… My, err, lower back," She crouches and as her hands shift over his sensitive lower back, he wonders what other torture he might be subjected to today as his iron-like self-control nearly slips. She's touched him like this before – it's nothing weird, so why does he feel so focussed and attuned to every touch?

"Okay, you're all set, would you like a massage?" Closing his one open eye for a moment, he forces himself back under control as yes, he would like one, but knowing that his control will completely slip and he doesn't want the trouble _that_ will cause so he's forced to decline.

Nearly biting his tongue, he shakes his head – how is it that they've switched roles? Before, it was her having to internally detach herself from his probing questions and now, he's the one _trying_ to detach himself so that he won't do something else stupid.

Why does he feel as though he already has done?

"No, Sakura, it's okay," He looks over to the table and picks up his shirt, tugging it swiftly over his head before rising to his feet, "I'll stretch when I get home, thanks for healing me, you didn't have to," He slides his flak-jacket over his shoulders as she offers him a shy but _genuine_ smile,

"Anytime, Kakashi, please take it easy over the next few days to allow your injuries to fully finish healing;" He returns her (for once real) smile with his own fake one, thankfully now covered by his mask, before slipping his _zori_ on,

"I will, Sakura… Thank you," He tugs open the door and steps out, but before she can respond, he closes the door and walks a few paces away, leaning on the rail slightly and allows his eye to drift closed as he's certain now.

Yes, he'd definitely missed, or lost, or fallen or whatever the hell it is.

(And he's sure as hell not going back for his haitai-ate or glove now, he has spare ones, anyway.)


	34. Chapter 34

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_34. Oh, Did I Miss Again?_

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><p>Sakura sits on the railing of the bridge waiting for Naruto, Kakashi and Sai; it has been about three days since she last set eyes on Kakashi – which was partially a good thing as he did still need rest after his injuries. However, this has also made it near impossible for her to figure out what Kakashi is thinking or what was wrong with him – after all, he'd been in such a hurry to leave after she'd healed him that he'd forgotten his glove and haitai-ate.<p>

The great _Copy_ Nin, who's _memorized_ over 1,000 jutsu, _forgot_ a glove and headband. Unthinkable. Impossible.

She'd noticed his behaviour from when she bumped into him in the Shushuya, he'd been just about the last person she expected to see (guessing that he is as about as much of a recluse as she is) and he definitely seemed a little off.

But she'd chalked it up to perhaps feeling a little emotionally drained after the mission (she sure as hell had been) after all, it was she and Kakashi who seemed to end up as the focus of that mission in varying ways. Naruto is too naturally cheerful (or stupid) to end up emotionally drained by mission (unless Sasuke is involved) and Sai? He doesn't have emotions to begin with so that case is pretty easily solved. Speaking of which;

"Good morning,"

"Morning, Sai," She offers a half-hearted fake smile (at least _he_ doesn't or can't pick up on them) "How are you, this morning?"

"Well, thank you ugly dog, and you?" _Well, at least he's getting slightly closer to polite_, he gave her a quick fake smile before he looked a little more cautious; "Uh… May I ask you something, Ms. Beautiful?" Raising an eyebrow, the immediate reason for his change of tune was obvious: he must have been listening to Naruto's 'how-to-speak-to-women-guide' (apparently after Jiraiya, he is "expert", although he has a suspicious lack of evidence to show) sighing, Sakura nodded,

"Go ahead,"

"Well, um, when we were all in the Shushuya with our age-mates, you went up to buy drinks for myself and Naruto – where Neji-san accompanied you. Why did you come back to our table?"

"What? What do you mean?"

"You bumped into Hatake-san at the bar, did you not? Shouldn't you have gone to join him? After all, he is your-"

"Sai, I don't know why you seem to think that there is something… _romantic_ going on between Kakashi and I but there isn't – he, long ago, was my first genin sensei and later my team captain – I've known the man for over a decade as I have Naruto. But because Kakashi is older than us, it's natural for us to have a slightly different relationship dynamic than me and Naruto – just as he and Kakashi have a slightly different dynamic to Naruto and I." Sai thought for a moment,

"Yes, I can appreciate that, but don't you think he is a little… Overprotective of you?"

"To the extent you must be thinking of? No. He is a little, yes, because I am team medic and to that end, I have to remain away from battle situations as well as the fact that I'm female which – although irritating – is also somewhat understandable." They lapse into silence for a little while before Sai speaks again,

"Human interpersonal relationships are very confusing,"

"Yes… And most of us find them just as confusing as you do; we have very complex systems of communication – most of which are nonverbal and each action often has multiple ways to interpret it and multiple meanings. And because feelings are about the most personal element to an individual, it's very easy to become hurt even if it is not intended, so most people try to hide their real feelings and this tends to be very confusing to others."

"How do you know what they mean?"

"It's often guess work where you have to find evidence to support your theory about what they might be feeling – although the best way to get them to tell you directly," Sai looked positively confused;

"But, did Hatake-san imply that he was going to marry you at the Daimyo's son's wedding?" Sakura rolls her eyes,

"That was a lie,"

"But why did he choose that particular one?"

"Probably because it was most believable but non-negotiable in the context,"

"But how did you know Hatake-san was lying?" At this point, Sakura couldn't help but crack up in riotous laughter at Sai's comment, she nearly fell backwards into the river although just managed to save herself, "Um, Sakura, what's so funny?"

"A-haha, s-sorry, Sai, it just the way you said that made it seem like if Kakashi wasn't lying, then I'd be imprisoned for the rest of my life," Managing to calm herself, she noted Sai's further confusion,

"Well that's what I've heard marriage is-" Sakura shook her head,

"Well, it's not _supposed _to be, but some can end up that way – but no, if Kakashi was _really _going to do that, the I would have had some prior indication and we would have had some prior romantic relationship, which we haven't. Besides, I could always have declined,"

"Why would you have done that? Hatake-san is very well respected in the village, a powerful shinobi and he obviously-"

"Good morning, Sakuurraa-chaaan!" Naruto appeared with a huge grin on his face, "Morning, Sai,"

"Morning, Naruto… Why so happy?"

"Hmm? Well, we're training today!"

"Baka," Sakura mutters under her breath, silently wondering if Naruto would explode if he was given something to be _ecstatic_ about. Thankfully, however, he managed to shut Sai up – what_ is_ his obsession with her and Kakashi anyway?

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><p>They'd waited the longest yet for Kakashi and by the time he'd turned up Sakura had nearly convinced herself he wasn't coming and that he had <em>forgotten<em> about them. As soon as he appeared he was very quick to dish out orders – sparring, Sai vs. himself and Sakura vs. Naruto – without so much as a glance in her vague direction, let alone making eye contact.

After a couple of hours, they've come to a halt and Kakashi dismisses them, without so much as a glance back; Sai disappears in a swirl of ink, Naruto is quick to run away (for ramen) and Sakura is equally as quick to gain Kakashi's attention. She notes he seemed to be a little slow in leaving but she has more pressing matters; instead of acknowledging her presence he merely stands still,

"Kakashi, I have your haitai-ate and glove… And, I hope that your injuries have fully healed," She walks around to stand in front of him, his book is already out so that he doesn't look at her.

"They have, Sakura, thank you," He accepts both items, again without looking up from his book, before stuffing them in his pouch,

"Good, I'm also curious about something," He pauses slightly, but says nothing, "What was it like to spar with Sai? Did he possess a strange sort of passion I sometimes glimpse when he's in perfect timing with Naruto, or was it more like fighting a machine?"

Kakashi stiffens and raises his eye, finally up off his book and onto the kuniochi in front of him, she looks expectant but speaks again before he has a chance to; "I'm conscious that I never really answered your question all that time ago… Did you get the answer you needed?" His expression is so blank that Sakura nearly fears for a moment that he's performed a kawarimi and left a scarecrow in his place, but he eventually responds. His tone is soft and somehow resigned, absolute;

"I don't like sweets, Sakura," She raises her eyebrow in an expression of playful disillusionment;

"Well neither do I based on how _you_ define them," Kakashi was unable to resist the tiny twitch to his lips at her insinuation; even though he didn't want to, she manages to bring a smile to his lips in less than three minutes. Thankfully all was hidden by his mask. "Anyway… I, uh, wanted to say that I'm sorry about the other day… I guess it must have been pretty awkward for you and-" He cuts her off by placing a hand on her head and ruffling her hair as though she were twelve again;

"It's okay, Sakura-chan, there really was nothing you could have done about it even if it _was_ you fault – which it couldn't possibly have been," He offers a wide grin – but it _has_ to be fake considering the emotionlessness he was displaying not thirty seconds ago.

It's as though they've suddenly reverted right back into their old roles and dynamic but Sakura can sense something isn't quite right – _he's hiding something _– this, in itself isn't unusual behaviour for the Copy Nin – but it seems as though he's hiding something major after he's been so_ honest_ with her over the past few months. More so that she's ever known him to be, so why the sudden change?

He's suddenly gone in a puff of smoke and the fading warmth of where his hand had been on her head seems all the more lacking.

How is it that Kakashi has become so distant from her? How is it possible that he could have been so pushy and involved for the few months before the mission and all of a sudden act as aloof and disinterested as he always has done? What has changed? Is it because she seems and feels much better after the mission, he thinks his task is complete? That there's nothing left to solve and so is on his way?

Something about it saddens Sakura, she's gotten used to being so close to him and hates the idea of suddenly being dropped and returned to a state of meaninglessness to him – she'd far rather keep the strange, easy friendship of sorts they'd forged – but is it so one-sided, that after Kakashi had decided he was done with it, it would drop like a stone?

Sakura can't be sure, but before she can decide what to do, she senses a presence in front of her and looks up to spot a very pale-faced boy looking like he's full of questions.

_Oh, Kami!_


	35. Chapter 35

Yep, title from Genesis' song: _That's All_

For all you Sai fans out there (you seem to be many) - I don't want this to seem repetitive_,_ but it_ is_ important -

_.._

_.  
><em>

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_35. Just As I Thought It Was Going Alright, I Find Out I'm Wrong When I Thought I Was Right_

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><p>Kakashi tugs the glove out of his pouch to look at it, she'd been thoughtful enough to wash it, apparently; he averts his eye from it to Sakura still stood in the middle of the training field. It is, truly, a curious sensation having such turbulent emotions which seem to change with every breath – Kakashi is so used to his naturally even temperament that he's not entirely sure what the right course of action is.<p>

His recent and rather upsetting revelation about his feelings for Sakura had forced him to think long and hard; the natural conclusion – he surmised, after assessing all the possibilities, probabilities and other such factors – was to stay well enough away.

It is both possible and probable that Sakura has no such feelings – or if she does, they would most likely be false, due to the role he's come to play – and that would be the ultimate problem. Known but unreciprocated feelings put enormous pressure on both parties and after he'd put so much into getting Sakura _back into_ the team (and getting close to her), that the worst he could do would be to force her away again through something as – relatively speaking – insignificant as his now strong but turbulent emotions.

Once he'd decided upon this course of action, he'd worked to make sure that he'd had almost _too_ much to occupy him so that he wouldn't just be left with nothing to fill the void so to speak. He'd gotten used to being around Sakura again, she was agreeable company to him and his generally solitary nature meant that he would feel the loss more keenly – but he isn't a master at evasion and concealment for nothing.

It wouldn't be too difficult, he'd supposed, to draw a wider emotional distance between the kuniochi and himself, he'd simply have to distract himself quickly by sparring with one of the boys. He'd work on steeling himself against her once he knew that he would be able to distance and distract himself.

Unfortunately, he'd had no such luck, he'd already procrastinated long beyond what was normal for him and when he'd eventually appeared it took every inch of the decades of self-discipline not to stare at her. It seemed, too, that as soon as he was in the immediate company of her, she seemed to draw all of his attention and focus like a paperclip to a magnet.

Apart from the completely alien feelings and actions he seemed to be taking, he couldn't resist them and what scared him the most was how _good_ it felt just to give in to them and allow his eye to flick over to her momentarily and watch her twist out of the way whilst she sparred with Naruto. So _graceful_. What must she feel like to the touch? Fragile – seemingly, at least – he remembers that much from when he hugged her back then…

Perhaps somewhere, he knew this wasn't going to work – he'd gotten so close and been so honest with Sakura over the past few months that it would be a very obvious change for him to suddenly draw back from it. Then she was in front of him – teasing him with being so close but nonetheless out of reach – and then with that damn quip about Sai.

He knew she wouldn't stand for it if he'd forced her to listen to him and then, when their situations were reversed, to force her away and _not_ to try and help him. He'd thought that he'd levelled the playing field – that he'd managed to achieve some sense of status-quo to give himself a chance to back away and to do what was right but he just _had_ to be slow in leaving, didn't he?

He, after spending the entire training session feeling as though he wanted get closer, ever closer to her – suddenly recoiled could feel only anxiety and the desire to retreat to a safe distance to assess the situation when she stopped him. _Shit_, he runs a hand through his hair, _maybe this would all be easier to cope with if I could even predict – to any degree of accuracy – what I'll be feeling in five? Ten? Two minutes maybe… Haa…_

He can't understand how quickly he seems have been set upon by the emotions – wasn't it supposed to be a gradual process? Where one slowly comes to grasp their feelings? Not get bombarded with all of this confusing, turbulent, distracting and unending shit? _I can't believe people actually seek this out… They must be mad…_

He narrows his eye slightly as Sai appears in a swirl of ink a few meters in front of Sakura, wondering what on earth the boy could want with her, Kakashi tilts his haitai-ate up to be able to observe their lip movements. He knows this isn't right, but _just long enough to grasp the gist of their conversation – just long enough_-

_'Ms. Beautiful, I was just observing your interaction with Hatake-san and I think I've come to some conclusions… Would you like to hear them?' _What? When did he start using names like _that_ for Sakura? He _doesn't_-_!_

_'Go on then,'_ She looks more exasperated than plain angry – what's changed? Shit…

_'I saw that Hatake-san was not nearly as open with you as he usually is – he seemed quite withdrawn, although it is hard to tell with him… I don't understand what that might mean – if he didn't want to speak to you, why did he stay?' _

_'You saw that too?' _Sai cocks his head as Sakura averts her eyes slightly, eliciting a frown from Kakashi, _'I'm not sure if there's something wrong with Kakashi, he does seem a little off…' _

_'You do not know the reason for his condition?' _What condition? A flare of anger accompanies the boy's words, although Kakashi has to admit: maybe he's suffering with chronic foolishness; the faint laugher of Sakura's interrupts his thoughts,

_'I don't think Kakashi has a 'condition' – there might be any number of reasons why he might be feeling less than 100% or we could just be reading too much into his typically aloof behaviour,' _

_'Hmm… But you seemed to be acting strangely too. You showed greater facial expression to Hatake-san than to either Naruto or I today. You also seemed to exhibit an emotion that is quite rare for you… I think it was… uh… playfulness. I've read that this is a common emotion to display in front one whom you are sexually attracted to… Is this not the case?' _Sakura blushes a brilliant red at Sai's last comment and doesn't meet his eyes but eventually musters a response, intuition tells Kakashi that he is privy to important information, but he isn't able to tell exactly _how_ it's important;

_'Uh, well, yes you are right – that is often an emotion displayed but… it's not as if you can judge it on something so circumstantial – just that emotion alone means lots of things,' _

_'What did you mean by it?' _

_'W-well… I suppose that by projecting an air of informality and amiability is often much easier in trying to gauge someone's emotional state, which is what I was trying to do,' _Hmm, I should have known better, of course she wouldn't…

_'Then why do you look… ah, embarrassed?'_

_'Because you're being so pushy! Why are you so obsessed with the idea that there is something going on between Kakashi and I?'_

_'Because when I observe the interaction between you two, I can see all of the signs listed – as stated by the book – of people who are attracted to one another, but are not admitting it,' _Sakura's face fell into her hand, and Kakashi can easily imagine that a sigh is her primary response,

_'Underneath the underneath, right?' _An almost automatic smile finds its way to Kakashi's lips;

_'What?'_

_'Never mind,'_

_'Was that one of Hatake-san's sayings? Apparently your attraction is-'_

_'What I'm saying is that you don't have all of the facts about us or the situation – and the book is only a guide in general – it won't necessarily work for everyone. You can't have a generic rule and apply it unilaterally, everyone's a little bit different and they all work in different ways. _

_'And stop calling me 'Ms Beautiful' only when you want something! I would have answered your questions anyway with you calling me as normal, I don't appreciate being treated so disrespectfully... See you later, Sai'_ With that, Sakura turns on her heel and began to walk away, Sai remains stock still for a few moments and Kakashi isn't sure whether Sakura has displayed the fact she is harbouring feelings for him or not.

Sai does, after all, really know how to push her buttons.

However, if Sai were way off, wouldn't she have just punched him? That was, after all, what she desperately wanted to do after all of the times he foolishly made mention of it during the mission – so… _have_ her feelings changed, in one capacity or another, for him? Kakashi allows a great sigh to escape him just as a swirl of ink attracts his attention next to him, remaining cool, he turns to face the boy,

"Hatake-san, you witnessed the exchange between the Hag and I?"

"I did,"

"What do you think?"

"About what?"

"Do you think Sakura is sexually attracted to you?" _I wish_,

"…I wouldn't… know," Sai cocks his head again,

"You seemed to stutter, that is most unlike you… Are you feeling unwell? Or is it because the focus of the conversation is the Hag?" Kakashi doesn't answer immediately and Sai takes time to elaborate, "The book often says that if a conversation is focussed upon the one that another is attracted to, it can often make them very uncomfortable,"

"I'm… Just feeling a little under the weather,"

"Perhaps you should go and see the Hag, her medical prowess means that she is more than likely able to heal you and whilst you're there you can explain your attraction to her," Kakashi nearly choked on his own spit at Sai's lack of subtlety,

"Sai, there is nothing happening or going to happen between Sakura and I in this fashion, do I make myself clear?" His words end up almost being growled but Sai merely thinks for the moment, not looking in the slightest intimidated,

"What do you-"

"You will not speak of this topic again, understood?" He nods and is quick to disappear; Kakashi rises to full height and leaps down from the tree walking slowly away; although he isn't _sick_ per se, Sai is right in that it is something (only) Sakura can heal.

But maybe Sai's lack of emotional clouding is enabling him to see what's hidden from Kakashi?


	36. Chapter 36

Title: Genesis _That's All_ [again, lol, _addicted_ to this song…]

Don't worry their dancing around each other won't last long – just enough time to finish elaborating what needs to be – this chapter _could_ seem odd to you, but it will be explained ^-^

*evil grin*

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_36. There's No Point In Trying To Pretend_

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><p>Sakura stretched her arms high over her head as she felt her body slowly attempting to unwind after a day at the hospital – surprisingly, however it had been an incredibly slow day after the initial complains had been deal with. Most of the remaining patients were those with chronic but generally unchanging conditions – so much so that three hours before her shift was due to end, Shizune told her to go home.<p>

After initial protesting, she was coerced out of the door by the promise of extra time off from her already tiring work load (as well as a pack of her favourite uriō with azuki bean paste filling [traditional Japanese sweet, they're a form of steamed rice cake with various fillings]). Grinning to herself, she decided that perhaps a walk and a rest somewhere calm and quiet would be ideal whilst she ate her uriō; marching off in the general direction of the Hokage mountain to bask in the dying light of the early evening.

Her mood had been unusually good all day – for specific reasons unknown to her – as her feet carried her swiftly as she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so _light_. It was as though someone had brushed off the dust and burdens weighing her down and given her respite. It was truly a remarkable feeling – as sad as that apparently made her seem.

Brushing it off, she organised her chakra (which was still plentiful from the slow day at the hospital) she wandered (well, half skidded) down the vertical slope until she landed with a soft pat on top of the Nidaime's head. Settling herself in his hair, where she had a perfect view out over Konoha but was relatively hidden, she pulled the small packet of uriō out and placed them by her side.

Enjoying for a few moments the ability to simply _relax_ she leaned back on the sloped protrusion of a spike of the Nidaime's hair and watch the slowly turning sky. Reaching over to pick up and tear off the packaging from her treat, she felt his presence shift and couldn't help but smile to herself – she hadn't seen him recently – a good week since their last training session but seemed to find herself smiling at the very thought of him.

Which, apart from being odd and occasionally a cause for worry that he should elicit such a reaction, she couldn't help but note how he (even in abstract form) seemed to provide her with a sense of calm;

"Kakashi?" He took a moment, but landed behind her silently,

"Hello Sakura-chan… Why are you picnicking alone?" His tone was cheerful – if a bit thin – as he walked up to stand beside her, looking up, her once smile fell away to leave her looking unimpressed;

"It's not a picnic – I've just come across a little free time – as well as these sweets and I wanted to enjoy them both," He crouched down,

"You shouldn't accept sweets from strangers, Sakura-chan,"

"Baka, Shizune isn't a stranger!"

"Well, that's alright then," He smiled again but it seemed a little odd – why was he acting like everything's fine? Deciding to ignore it, lest she ruin it, she looked away from him and back over to the sky;

"You're welcome to one if you like – oh, of course, you don't like sweets," She kept a playful tone although she didn't look at him, feeling conscious of his presence beside her;

"Hmm, I seem to recall you claiming that you didn't like them either,"

"I meant I didn't like _your_ sweets –I mean, err, your definition of sweets," She turned her head a little further away to hide her embarrassment, "But I do like these… A lot in fact," keeping her eyes off him, she stretched out her hand and plucked another uriō before nibbling at the edge of it, feeling horribly self-conscious.

"…You don't mind if I join you?" Surprised, she turned to look at him – he held an expression of general expectancy and she nodded,

"I thought you already were," But he didn't immediately move, before she offered a peaceable smile; "Sure… Just as long as you didn't bring Sai with you,"

"Has he been bothering you?" There was heavy curiosity laced with something else which Sakura couldn't entirely figure out,

"Ah, he just can't seem to leave me alone – thinking that I know precisely what you're thinking or feeling…"

"Why's that?" His voice was again held abundant curiosity but held a distinct undertone – of something she again couldn't decipher;

"…Uh, well, he, err, thinks we're together – _still_ – and seems to think it's amusing to study us as test subjects,"

"Hmm," His perfectly reassuring but non-committal sounding voice seemed to achieve neither purpose, "I'll tell him to drop it if he tries again,"

"You know, that _will _only reinforce the idea to him that you're being overprotective… And according to the almighty book that must mean you care more than is normal for an old sensei… Or team leader… Or…" _Friend_ –that term seemed both appropriate and inappropriate; allowing her voice to trail off, his laughter took over,

"Haha, well I hope you told him that people aren't so easy to decipher – that there are many levels to behaviour and many reasons which aren't easily seen,"

"Yea, yea underneath the underneath and all that, I told him but I don't think he understood," She picked up the last uriō as she watched the last of the sun disappearing, feeling a small shiver, she chewed thoughtfully,

"How much time off did Shizune-san give you?"

"Only this evening – a few hours shy of the end of my shift as it was a really quiet day… I'd forgotten what it was like to finish a day's work and not feel completely drained," She leaned right back and allowed her eyes to drift closed, definitely feeling tired – but not exhausted as she normally would be.

They glided into silence as Sakura couldn't resist how relaxed and secure she felt leaning against the stone and with the silver haired man beside her. She wasn't quite used to spending time with people – least of all him – in such a fashion; true he had been the one she'd spent the most time with over recent months but usually she'd had something to occupy her. This struck a thought, without opening her eyes she spoke;

"How's your back been recently? You haven't come to me for a massage in a while,"

"Well, the last mission wasn't exactly taxing and I didn't really want to bother you," She couldn't resist the smile at the tone in his voice which she'd come to recognise he used when lying – however slightly –

"You didn't seem to care too much before,"

"Hmm; well, things change,"

"…It's not a bother Kakashi, as long as I'm not right in the middle of something or on my way to the hospital, then I'm happy to make time for you," She still hadn't opened her eyes – not really wanting to for some reason – but made sure to keep her face passive, displaying only honesty. Another lapse into comfortable silence,

"…You seem… a lot better than before, Sakura…"

"I know… I suppose that mission was exactly what I needed… As much as I hate to admit it," She allowed a smile to show through her voice – reflecting the emotion within,

"I'm… glad…" She cracks an eye open and fixes it on him, finding his gaze already on her, she smiled a little wider,

"Thank you, Kakashi… I must admit, I've enjoyed getting to know you a little better over the past few months," Catching herself, she amended her statement slightly, "I mean, err…um…"

"I know what you mean," The warmth in his voice wasn't lost on her and she allowed her eye to close again; the kuniochi nearly jumped out of her skin as he brushed his hand down her upper arm – she snapped her eyes open, "You're cold… Let me walk you home," Staring up at him, as he'd already found his feet. She stuffed the uriō wrapper in her pouch and found her feet, as they climbed over to the stepped trail down to the base of the monument, Sakura chose to speak again;

"You don't _have_ to walk me, you know," She can see Kakashi only smile in response as she falls into step next to him; she hadn't noticed before, but she really does feel so comfortable at his side,

"I know… But that wouldn't be very gentlemanly, would it?" She allows a breath of laughter to escape her,

"No, I suppose not," They reach the bottom of the monument quickly and walk, in a relaxed gait, towards Sakura's apartment,

"I have a mission tomorrow – it shouldn't be more than a week or two, so our training session will have to be postponed… Will you let Naruto and Sai know?"

"Of course," They rounded one of the final corners and Sakura almost couldn't help herself forming a 'concluding sentence' of sorts, "I had fun this evening, it was good to talk to you again, Kakashi, it feels like it's been- oh my god, Neji-san! I completely forgot about you! I'm sorry!" She hastily turned back to Kakashi after Neji nodded his acceptance of Sakura's apology, "I'm so sorry but I have to see to Neji-san, be careful on your next mission, okay? Come and see me if you need to when you get back,"

He stared carefully down at her anxious but well-meaning expression – of _course_ he would be visiting – he'd make sure of it. At seeing the other male steal Sakura's attention so quickly, it made Kakashi realize precisely how much he enjoyed being with the kuniochi - _alone_ - and it seemed beyond stupid to let an opportunity such as this slip past him – one way or another, he would have to resolve this with Sakura.

And he was _going_ to do so.


	37. Chapter 37

Sorry this has been so late… I had _Go No Further_ to update and I really didn't want to rush this chapter;

Title: Genesis_ That's All_

Just in case: this is _not_ the last chapter (although it is stupidly long), there's still a few more to go ^-^

I really hope this chapter is alright...And not unsatisfying or silly or annoying in anyway...

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_37. There's Been No One Who Makes Me Feel Like You Do_

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><p>Kakashi landed just outside of Konoha's gates having completed his mission; he was tired and carried a small injury, but all he could think about for the past week and a half had been the next few hours. He'd allowed his attention to wander to her all too often (as well as whatever she <em>could<em> be up to with that damn Hyuuga) that he slipped up, well, almost, on his mission and as a result came all too close to the possibility that he might have _failed _it.

He managed to complete it nonetheless, but he still wasn't sure how to broach the topic with Sakura – it wasn't as if they'd met as adults in a bar somewhere and slowly built a rapport. Even _if_ they'd built up a similar rapport, his role was very clearly defined and, by its very nature, didn't leave all that much room for romantic entanglement – for a very good reason, his previous mission had been proof and he wasn't even entangled yet!

"Hatake-san," He nodded his greeting to the two on guard duty, as he continued on, hiding the gash on his bicep; he knew that his first stop would be to speak to Sakura – and that implied that he'd be carrying an injury. He didn't really face an opponent which really made him struggle, but he'd managed one anyway.

Had he _allowed_ himself to get injured? Somehow, his instinctual affirmative – which should have made him pause – didn't; having an injury wouldn't immediately betray his reason to see her and therefore give her a chance to close off. He still couldn't be absolutely certain that she felt anything beyond friendship for him.

Yes, he can draw out a real smile from her, fairly easily it seemed and he was able to hold her attention enough that she'd forgotten about seeing Neji – but those incidents, by themselves, weren't necessarily enough to prove she felt anything for him, were they?

Kakashi continued his relatively slow gait towards her apartment hoping that was in, alone and in an amiable mood. What if she rejected him? Or said that she was in a relationship with the Hyuuga? Or because of Sai, she pushed all thoughts containing any possibility of liking him far, far away?

Those were all very really possibilities, frightening ones, but Kakashi was getting nowhere in his current state; one way or another, he had to resolve his feelings and get himself back on track – even if it meant the pain of rejection. Steeling himself, he walked up the three flights of stairs to her apartment and before he had time to second guess himself, he rapped harshly on the door.

Nothing.

_Shit_, he knocked again and still no sign of life emerged; concentrating, he couldn't feel her chakra anywhere in the building. He sighed heavily, resisting the urge to punch the door in frustration, he stepped back and leant on the wall next to her door; what was he supposed to do now? For all he knew her shift could just have begun – should he wait here until she returns? It was early evening and he had no idea of her schedule – is this a generally busy time or not?

He wasn't sure at all, closing his eye and leaning his head back against the wall, he allowed another sharp sigh to escape him; it would be silly to wait here if she'd only just left and yet, he knew that if he walked away, he might never gather the courage again.

He'd give it an hour, he decided, the gash on his arm wasn't in need of immediate attention – thankfully – and if she still hadn't returned from the hospital then he'd just have to try another day.

He'd have to hope, too, that his resolve wouldn't weaken –_no!_ He wouldn't let himself be such a coward, if today's delay was unavoidable, then he'd return at a more suitable time; if this were a mission, then he would not be so easily off put by lack of an opening to his target. But somehow, this was feeling horribly like he was his own target and working against unknown odds.

Resisting the pain in his bicep, he folds his arms over his chest trying to think of the most appropriate words, he still hadn't opened his eyes and his attention was near fully diverted so that her voice came as a surprise to him;

"I don't know whether to be angry or pleased,"

"Eh?" His eye snapped open to see her wry smile with a shopping back in one hand and the other holding her key, he immediately stood up straight as she walked towards him, "What do you mean?" She twisted the key in the lock and stepped inside,

"I'm not sure whether to be annoyed at you for getting such a superficial injury or pleased that you actually came to me to sort it out," He closed the door behind him and slipped off his sandals, _first hurdle,_

"What makes you think either of those assumptions are true?" She looked over her shoulder and gave him an exasperated smile as she plonked the bag down on the table before set about pulling off her own boots,

"Oh please, if your injury had been that severe, you wouldn't have been able to fold your arms and if you'd only come for a social call, then you wouldn't have left any evidence that you had a wound at all," _Damn, she really does know me_;

"Hmm," He continued to stand awkwardly, until she noticed,

"Take a seat, Kakashi, I'll just put this away quickly, please take off your vest and roll up your sleeve as high as you can," He nodded, and slipped out of the green jacket, depositing it over the back of the kitchen chair, before he began to push the material of his shirt up his arm; he mentally cursed as he could feel the injury reopening and fresh blood cascaded down his arm, dripping steadily to the floor,

"Here," Sakura threw him a small patch of gauze which he caught effortlessly and swiftly pressed it to the wound, stemming the flow of blood; he was still reluctant to move, for fear of spreading blood over her home. She washed her hands after packing away the items which needed to be put in the freezer of fridge and turned to him, holding her med-kit;

"Don't worry, I can clean up the blood later, just take a seat, Kakashi," He reluctantly complied, for what he was hoping to say, smearing her apartment with his blood wasn't exactly a romantic gesture. Not that he'd necessarily been planning on one…_shit_, should he have? Maybe it would have-

"I think it would be better if you took off your shirt," Her fingers were stained red from the blood which had seeped into his sleeve; he nodded, as he quickly yanked the shirt over his head (glad he wore his tank and attached mask today); Sakura was quick to swipe away at another oozing of blood before the tips of her fingers met the rough edges of the gash.

The green healing chakra was quick to nit the wound back together, as she met his eyes briefly, he couldn't resist the bold of nervousness at her proximity,

"It wasn't serious and you didn't have an infection, you'll be sorted in a moment or two," He nodded, keeping his expression neutral at a slight loss for what to say next; she pulled her hands away and walked over to the sink to wash them, Kakashi was still trying to get his mouth to work when she reappeared, brushing a cool, wet cloth over his arm, washing away the dried blood.

"How long had you been waiting?" Her voice was surprisingly tentative,

"Not long, fifteen minutes, maybe,"

"Ah," She pulled away from his arm, "I think that's the first time _you've_ ever waited for _me_," The smile in her voice was evident as his arm immediately chilled from the evaporating moisture, she bent to scrub away the drops which had, since, congealed on the floor; despite his nervousness, he can't help but feel relaxed by her company. Sakura stood to run the cloth under the water for a few minutes before squeezing it out, she picked up his Jounin shirt and did the same for the sleeve, washing out the worst of the blood;

"Do you have any other injuries?"

"No," He opened his mouth to protest as she carries away his shirt, but she disappeared around a corner, he took a deep breath to calm himself, _the longer he dawdled, the worse the outcome was likely to be_, feeling marginally calmer, he prepared his opening sentence when a noise reached his ears that had never, previously, caused his blood to run cold.

If his shirt was in the washing machine, he spoke too soon and she rejected him…

"Kakashi, come here," He snaps attention to her, she was pointing to the…_bed?_ "I can tell by your posture, besides, it should help with whatever's been bothering you," Well, there was _one_ bed-based activity he could think of which certainly _would_ help with his problem, but somehow, he got the feeling that she was somewhat more innocent than she should be for pointing at a bed and speaking like that. He found his feet and walked over to her before he had time to resist, he too pulled up the hem of his under shirt, no longer feeling too anxious about exposing his face,

"A-are you sure?"

"Of course," Her smile couldn't have been sweeter or more reassuring, he yanked his top over his head and lay down before she'd have a chance to look, even if she wanted to; he felt her kneel next to him and her cool hands found his back.

Her soothing hands made it difficult for him to concentrate but he _did_ manage to pick upon the fact that they seemed to linger, perhaps a tiny bit too long on him, in places. Taking this as the clearest sign he was ever going to get that her feelings toward him definitely weren't the same as before, he allowed a sleepy grumble of approval escape him, not missing her breath of laughter at him.

"Sakura…I think I owe you an explanation for my actions over the past few weeks," He turned his head so that his remaining natural eye was showing as he rested his temple on his folded arms; although the only parts of his face visible were his eye, forehead and top of his cheek, he felt it an important sign of good faith,

"Oh? What do you mean?" Her words were laced with curiosity and slight hesitancy; her hands paused momentarily but quickly continued,

"When… I first noticed that you seemed…_different_, I must admit that my curiosity was rather cold; I wondered why and sought only to answer my questions," He allowed a twinge of regret to seep in but her own short laugh overrode it,

"Yes, I thought that was the case,"

"You drew me in, though, when I realized that I didn't have a clue who you were…I started caring too much and it worried me when you could duck and weave away from answering my questions better than I could yours… I got used to spending so much time with you," Her hands slowed again, they felt as uncertain as he did,

"Kakashi, what are you trying to say?" He opened his eye slowly, knowing he couldn't avoid meeting her gaze forever, he allowed a large breath to escape and her hands completely stilled; shifting himself, he turned over onto his back and gazed steadily at her.

His hand seemed to find itself resting gently on the curve of her waist, forming a loose cage as she kneeled at his side, she felt so slight under his large hand and he resisted the urge to tug her forward to lie on top of him. He could see her eyes sweep all of the bare skin he was showing from waist to forehead, although her gaze lingered slightly, she didn't give all that much away;

"Sakura, I'm in love with you,"

He could feel her tense slightly under his grip, as she merely stared at him for a few moments as though she couldn't quite process what he'd said;

"W-what? Why?" Her voice held nothing negative or accusatory, this was good;

"You're a wonderful woman, Sakura, I enjoy spending time with you and…" Although he was compelled to go on, her unchanging expression told him that perhaps he'd misinterpreted, "Sakura, if you don't feel the same way then… It's, okay, I won't mention it again and I certainly won't allow it to interfere with the team work," He haltingly withdrew his hand (which was entirely too comfortable around her waist) but she was quick to grip is hand with her own,

"I…had no idea, I didn't notice at all… I completely _missed_ it… I can't believe you feel the same way…" Both of his eyes leapt open in surprise as he sat up and swivelled around so that his legs sat either side of her; his hand found its way to her back as she too twisted around, his exhilaration growing by the second.

"Do you...mean that?" She nodded shyly,

He wasted no time in dipping his head to press his lips to hers, savouring their softness and warmth as sheer pleasure bolted through him when she responded by kissing him back and her hands found his shoulders. Her kiss was tentative and uncertain but absolutely delicious and as much as he would have liked to already flip them over and settle himself on top of her, the last thing he wanted was to frighten her off by pushing too hard too soon.

As he pulled back, unable to keep the smile off his face whilst she shifted her legs to the side, allowing him to pull her flush to his chest; resting his chin on her head, he allowed a sigh of contentment to escape him,

"Sakura… I don't want to frighten you but I don't think I've ever felt so deeply for somebody…this isn't just a passing fancy, to me," She slipped her arms around his waist and squeezed him gently,

"It isn't to me either, Kakashi, although I _am_ scared… I haven't _been_ with anybody for a long time, but neither have I… well, been in love. I know what you probably think about Sasuke, but I know that wasn't real, I only liked the image of him in my head; but I've got no idea what's going to happen with this… Or…" Kakashi was surprised to learn that she'd never had such profound feelings, but maybe it made sense considering she was apparently as much of a recluse as he;

"I can only ask that you try, Sakura and I'd hope that you'd know me well enough by now, to know that I don't do things half-heartedly," She seemed to smile in spite of herself but he could senes that she was only slightly reassured, "Let's just take things slowly, there's no reason to rush and we don't have to set things in stone; I only want you to know that I'm serious about this," He tightened his grip slightly as he could feel her smile against his chest before she leaned back, to look at him before her eyes widened is apparent realization,

"Oh Kami, I completely forgot,"

"What?"

"I was supposed to go out tonight with Naruto and the others," She bit her lip somewhat apologetically, apparently he really had a knack for making her forgetful,

"With Neji?" The question was out of his mouth before he could completely control himself – or his tone of voice, she merely raised an eyebrow as her mouth quirked in what seemed to be a resisted smile;

"I think so… Is that a problem?"

"So long as there's nothing going on between you two," Sakura looked as though she didn't know whether to feel amused or confused at his slightly dark tone,

"No… There never was, why would you think so? Besides, did you really think I'd have said that to you or kissed you if there was?" Allowing a smile to appear on his face, feeling perhaps slightly silly for his uncharacteristic bout of jealousy to something which wasn't there, he shook his lead, feeling immediately reassured;

"Never mind…" He tugged her gently forward for another kiss, feeling more content than he had done for a long time; unfortunately, before he could deepen it as he wished, he sensed a familiar presence outside;

"Saakkuurraa-chan!" He called whilst his fist pounded on the door, _Naruto_, surprised she pulled away from Kakashi, although he kept his arms tightly around her,

"Sorry, Kakashi," She pushed gently off him so that she could rise to her feet, she stepped back from him as he swiftly tugged his shift over his head and fixed his mask in place. He gripped her wrist firmly but gently as she stepped away to the door and he tugged her back to him, allowing his arms to fold over her back and waist,

"Have a good time tonight, I'll see in a day or two to collect my shirt… Thank you for washing it and fixing me up," She hugged him firmly back, the feel of her pressed against him sending pleasurable tingles though the silver-haired shinobi,

"No problem," He pulled back just as Naruto knocked again he offered a smile before quickly slipping on his zori, haitai-ate and flak jacket and disappeared in a cloud of smoke, not taking his eyes off the kuniochi, or her smile, as he did so.

Although Kakashi was irritated at having to cut their meeting short, as he arrived back in his apartment, he supposed it was a good thing – a strategic break was an excellent way of allowing them both time to digest what had happened. He himself struggling to believe that she _loved him_ and was prepared to see where this would take them; as he merely stood still for a few moments, he allowed the feeling of (almost) utter contentment and relaxation to flow over him - yes, today really _had been_ worth all of the turmoil and unsettling feelings of before.

Although, next time, they'd be meeting at his place.


	38. Chapter 38

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_38. Though No Evidence Was Found_

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><p>Being the object of someone else's affection, <em>love<em> was a remarkable feeling; having herself been on the giving end of such feelings and it ended up so disastrously, she hadn't wanted to find herself in a similar position and so shied away from such interactions.

Somehow, though, the subtle but powerful feelings for Kakashi had been nothing like what she was expecting – which is why she probably hadn't noticed them, falling in love or even a romantic relationship hadn't exactly been at the top of her list of priorities.

Kakashi had, however, during their short few minutes before Naruto interrupted, made her extremely happy; as she sat there, between his legs and wrapped securely in his arms, she felt so _safe_ and so _comfortable_ – more so than she might have imagined.

Even the thought of the feel of his lips on hers was incredibly distracting; all through the evening as she sat between Neji and Hinata, all she could focus on was the way Kakashi felt against her.

It was a _touch_ embarrassing whenever Neji tried to talk to her and it took a few moments to move her mind from the silver-haired man to the one next to her; Neji didn't seem to appreciate it all that much, either. Maybe Kakashi had been right in his suspicion of the Hyuuga? Damn, what else had she missed?

Apparently, though, her uncharacteristically joyful mood caught many peoples' attentions (even _Naruto _noticed) and she had difficulty explaining why she was so happy – she wasn't entirely sure why, but she'd refrained from explaining about herself and Kakashi (thank _Kami_ Sai was away on a mission). She rather liked the idea of keeping things just between themselves – for now, at least, until she had more of an idea of what to expect from Kakashi as a lover rather than a taichou, sensei or sampai.

She hadn't been lying to Kakashi when she'd told him she was scared, she _was_; the very last thing she wanted was to allow herself to open up and get close to him to have it all blow up in her face. Although she _did_ feel as though she could be certain, with Kakashi, that whatever problems may arise they could be talked out – but that was the problem with emotional, especially romantic, commitments, they tended cut deeper than anticipated.

Still, it was reassuring to hear his voice so calmly explain that he wasn't going to rush things or make her feel as though she had to everything-perfect-all-at-once; she'd previously felt comfortable at his side, but that night, she'd felt a sense of security and contentment she hadn't realized was alien to her.

It had, much to her chagrin, been almost two days since she'd last set eyes on Kakashi – she'd had her regular shift the next morning but just as she was about to leave, a number of shinobi had come back dreadfully wounded (two of which were Genma and Kurenai). Thankfully, she'd managed to save them, but it had left her drained; after a nap in her office (she kept a tiny, roll out futon for nights like those) she'd recovered enough to check on them and further tend to their remaining wounds.

It was about lunch time as she finally managed to leave the hospital; thankfully, she wasn't quite so tired as hungry. After she'd managed about a third of her journey home, a familiar figure appeared at her side (and brought with him a small thrill of excitement). His nose was still buried in _Icha Icha Tactics_ although that was simply a matter of course for him and didn't really bother her,

"Hello, Sakura-chan… Where are you off to?"

"Home, I've just finished a shift and a half,"

"Ah… Tired?"

"More hungry,"

"Well then, would you like to have lunch with me?" Sakura nearly stopped dead in her tracks, for some reason finding his words to be a complete surprise, although unsure why;

"Uh… Sure," He smiled widely and directed them around the next corner.

They ended up on top of the Hokage mountain; although it wasn't on any of the monuments themselves, but rather back quite a bit in a comfortable secluded area.

"Where will we find lunch here?" Sakura asked, her curiosity rising (along with slight annoyance due to hunger) at whatever Kakashi may have planned; he snapped his book shut and tucked it away before regarding the underbrush of a nearby copse of trees as though he were looking at a selection of books on a shelf. He then inexplicably stuck his hand into one of them and drew out a small basket, with a soft;

"Ta da," Which, somehow, both was and wasn't very convincing; he set in on the ground, oblivious to Sakura's quirked eyebrow of mild confusion and began to rummage around in it, withdrawing a few different boxes from it. Sakura walked up and took a seat beside him, observing him for a few moments,

"Kakashi," He looked up recognition of her voice, "You are a strange and charming man…" She couldn't resist the smile on her face or shaking her head slightly in amusement as he accepted the (rather odd) compliment and smiled in thankfulness.

Sakura's eyes automatically glued the one of the boxes as she opened it, her hands reaching for the chopsticks on instinct rather than deliberate volition,

"Sakura?"  
>"Hmm?" She still didn't look up,<p>

"There are a few things I want talk about…Are you alright with that?"

"Huh?" She finally managed to tear her eyes off the delicious-looking lunch and over to him, "Sorry, Kakashi, I'm too hungry to be able to concentrate properly on what you're saying… Can we eat first?" Unable to hide his rising amusement he nodded as Sakura immediately plucked out and devoured an asparagus spear which was swiftly followed by an onirgiri.

Surprisingly quickly, Sakura leaned back on her elbows breathing a large sigh of relief as she drained her cup of green tea, hunger thoroughly satisfied.

"Feeling better? A shift and a half really takes it out of you," Averting her eyes away from the sky to him, she cracked a small smile,

"I usually wouldn't be quite so bad but there was an emergency just as I was leaving; Kurenai and Genma were really beaten up,"

"What?"

"Oh, don't worry, they're in a stable condition now, but it took most of the night get them that way,"

"Ahh," He placed his own chopsticks down, having taken a more leisurely pace to eat his lunch, "Have you told anyone about, well, _us_?" His expression was one of obvious curiosity,

"No… Was I supposed to?" He shook his head, a smile twitching at his lips,

"Neither have I… I just wondered if you have any preference about… Well…" He'd since shifted around to sit facing her, with his legs crossed, elbows on his knees,

"I don't have really strong feelings one way or the other, but I suppose I prefer to keep things between us for now, at least," He nodded carefully but as an expression of understanding or agreement she wasn't sure;

"Are you worried about what people may say? It _is_ bound to raise a few eyebrows after all,"

"Hmm," Sakura allowed her eyes to shift away from him, knowing that there would be some people who'd take the pleasure of criticism a little too far;

"Well…I don't really think the shinobi will be too much trouble, considering that between us, we've probably saved all their asses at least once… But if anything, it will probably be the civilians or possibly the councillors, considering out past relationship… But frankly, customary digression will probably prevent or at least solve the worst of it,"

"Hai," Kakashi raised a flat hand to is temple as a salute which was accompanied by a grin, Sakura tried to frown – so as to show her displeasure – but she couldn't quite keep a smile from her face,

"What?"

"You sound so _formal_; I'm glad you've given it some thought, but I'm not worried and I'm certain Tsunade won't have a problem with this," He just managed to keep his eyes from rolling at the comment, "And to be honest, there's nothing anyone can do to stop us anyway; but I, as well, would rather not advertise what's going on," Sakura couldn't agree more as she lay right down, Kakashi quickly began to stack the boxes back into the basket as a sudden thought struck her, causing a fit if irrepressible giggles to escape her,

"Hmm?"

"Well, at least we know there won't be a problem with Naruto or Sai," Kakashi's deeply unimpressed expression (even behind his mask which he'd since pulled up) caused another wave of amusement before she could control herself. Kakashi set himself down beside her with a hand behind his head and his other curling around Sakura who turned on her side resting her head on his shoulder.

"Are you sure you're happy with this?" He murmured, causing her eyes to open again as a smile returned;

"Hai, definitely," The hand behind his head shifted forward to pull down his mask and he quickly connected their lips, she slipped her arm around him and his free hand cupped the back of her head. She felt him lick over her bottom lip and Sakura happily opened her mouth to allow his tongue to snake out to massage hers as he trapped her in a deep, consuming kiss, whilst holding her tight to him.

As soon as he broke the kiss, he pushed his lips right back to hers for a decidedly more chaste kiss before allowing a breath of relaxed contentment to escape him, enjoying the effect his kisses had had on her and likewise hers on him. Pulling his mask back over his nose, he tugged her a little closer as she again laid her head on his shoulder, feeling secure in his grip.

The combined effect of a full stomach, the body warmth he was giving off and the satisfied pleasure running through her had a dangerously soporific effect – as well as his hand running soothingly over the curve of her waist and ribs sent her to sleep before she could stop herself, feeling completely at home next him.


	39. Chapter 39

I can _not_ believe that this fic has over _90_ reviews~! It's insane! 0.0! You guys are amazing!

Title from The Killers: _Read My Mind_

Also, this chapter will be something of a part 1 of 2 thing…sorry for the delay in publishing too!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_39. The Subtle Kiss That No One Sees_

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><p>Kakashi lifts the wooden beam into place before he hammers the nail in; he can't help but shift his eyes upwards to where he knows Sakura is working to his above right. Damn her for standing in such a provocative position on a wooden beam fifteen feet in the air – doesn't she know what she is doing to him? Probably, knowing her.<p>

They were on a D rank mission (thankfully not as punishment, rather, a fit of mistiming; as the other Jounins and Chuunins were out on the higher ranking missions when an un-ignorable, though low ranking mission appeared (requiring help to resurrect a number of burnt down buildings in Tanzaku Gai) and neither were there any Genin teams available, so Team Kakashi had been drafted.)

Kakashi isn't complaining, he's not much in the mood for leaping away into an S or A class assassination, though the exact reason why is beyond him. Still, it feel good to work with his hands in such a fashion and makes him feel as though he's done a hard day's work – as a matter of fact, he really wouldn't mind retiring to a quiet spot somewhere with warm sake at one elbow and Sakura at the other, but, unfortunately-

"Oi! Kakashi-sensei, I'm out of nails!" Stepping back to see Naruto waving almost hysterically at him from across the narrow street, on top of one of the roofs, he sighs to himself and leans down to pick up one of the small cloth bags full of nails to throw at the younger shinobi. They truly were a marvel of convince, Kakashi thought, those small, simple canvas bags for holding nails, they made the job infinitely easier; although it was still pretty boring as far as it goes.

The day is drawing to a close as Kakashi, Sai, Naruto and Sakura have completed about half of their work, everyone is waning, as he can see, well, everyone bar Naruto; he himself could do with a large, hot meal and a cool drink. As he fitted the last slat into place and secured it, he looks over to see Sakura land gracefully at the base of the building next to him ('building' was a liberal term, of course, the frame was up as well as a few walls).

"Ahh, are we nearly done for the day? I'm exhausted," She yawns whilst walking over to him, unable to resist a smile, he nods in affirmation,

"Yes, I think we can call it a day here,"

"Thank _Kam_-"

"Yaaaoooowww!" Naruto's shrill cry of pain jolts Sakura into medic mode, she leaps away over to where he's fallen off the roof, clutching his hand, hotly followed by Kakashi,

"Naruto, what's wrong?"

"M-my hand," She manages to pry the mangled looking fingers away from his chest so that she can get a look at it, Kakashi almost wonders why the Godaime sent them on this mission, but bright green chakra soon begins to emanate from Sakura's hand and she's slowly mending him. _Ah, that's why_.

"There you are, Naruto… Please be a little more careful,"

"Thanks, Sakura-chan… Kakashi-sensei…"

"Hai, Naruto, we'll call it a day and go and find dinner… Sai!" Said boy appears by his side in moments, staring at Naruto still sat on the ground clutching his hand with Sakura crouching next to him;

"Did dickless hurt himself? Is it life-threatening?" The passionless voice in which he asks might have fooled Kakashi into believing that Sai _wants_ it to be life-threatening,

"No, Sakura's already healed him and we're going to leave the work here for today,"

"Aah," Kakashi turns away slightly, seeing the elderly man responsible for helping the shinobi, hobbling up to them as fast as he can,

"Is everything alright? I heard a scream,"

"Yes, we're fine, Jin-san, but we are planning on finished our work here for today – I'm confident we can finish what's left tomorrow… Uh, can you recommend us a, uh, _reasonably_ priced restaurant and inn?"  
>"Ooh! Yes, I can, there is an inn down the street this way and I know for certain that they have rooms free," The old man begins to walk away, swiftly followed by the ninja, "I'd put you up myself, of course, but I simply don't have the space for all four of you… Although I may be able to off the young lady lodgings,"<p>

"That won't be necessary, she'll be staying with us, thank you," Kakashi is quick to cut across his voice gentle, but firm and definite; innocent offer or not (and he was inclined to think the former was unlikely), Kakashi didn't like splitting his team up (or allowing his girlfriend to sleep in the house of a strange man, who could not do the same for himself as well).

"Oh…very well, but it is reasonably priced, you may book a room there first and then I can take you to a restaurant,"

"Thank you, Jin-san," He leads them around a corner to where there was a small, but very traditional inn; "Alright, I'll go and book some room, you wait here," Kakashi orders quickly before walking inside, glad to find a young woman waiting to greet potential guests,

"Konbanwa [good evening],"

"Konbanwa, may I book two rooms please?"

"Hai, for how many guests?"

"Four,"

"Hmm… We have only a room of two single beds and one double… Is this acceptable?"

"Perfectly," Kakashi grinned to himself before swiftly paying and collecting the room keys, he wanders out of the small inn to find Jin again talking to his subordinates, as he stands next to Sakura; clearing his throat, he appears next to their something-of-an-escort for the evening;

"Jin-san?"

"Ah, of course," He steps away and thankfully it isn't far to a restaurant and Jin, it seems, will be joining them for dinner.

As a waiter directs them to a table, Kakashi takes the 'honour' of directing Jin to a seat at the head of the small table, with Naruto and Sai to one side and himself between Sakura and Jin; _was he being silly with all of this? Nah, Jin's probably just being a slight pervert of an old man, enjoying the company of a beautiful young woman…damn it._

Jin_ does_ look a little dismayed at not having Sakura by his side, but quickly gets over it as he glances over the menu; Kakashi too was pleasantly surprised by the choice on offer and eventually settles for octopus Kaarage with egg rice and miso soup;

"Ah, may I make a suggestion? I would like you all to join me for some warm sake at the end of a long day," Kakashi observes the table's reaction first, Sakura smiles in approval, as did Naruto, although Sai is as impassive as ever,

"Well, one bottle between us won't hurt, thank you Jin-san," A waiter reappears and everyone orders their preferred dishes, Naruto managing to surprise and lightly worry the waiter at how much he was ordering. Slightly to Kakashi's chagrin, it was doubtlessly Naruto's order which was holding everything up, although the sake arrived quickly and was at an extremely pleasing temperature.

As he took a swift sip of sake, he could feel his muscles relaxing slightly, after the physically tiring day; in a sense he'd fulfilled two-thirds of his wish from earlier in the day – with sake at one elbow and Sakura at the other.

Although he would have greatly preferred to have only those two keep him company, rather than a rambunctious Naruto and an overly chatty Jin. He sighs internally, still, at least he can be alone with Sakura later; he hadn't previously realised how frustrating it is to have her within arm's reach but ostensibly untouchable.

He can't help but think that if she'd given him even a swift kiss as she asked him, earlier, if they'd finished work for the day, he would be feeling much more at ease.

Still, he can't complain too much, he is getting to sleep next to her tonight – something they hadn't done yet, let alone, euphemistically, 'sleep together' – and strangely, although he'd wanted to (she was a very attractive woman, after all), he'd felt no desire to push the topic of sex between them (though it _is_ still early days).

He's still getting used to the idea that Sakura is _his_ and not someone who'll be moving off when he stops looking like fun for an evening; that their reason for being together is because they make each other _happy_, not because they'll be providing mutual sexual satisfaction.

He hadn't realized before, how relaxing it was to have her at his side, especially-

"And so, Sakura, my dear, how old are you?" _Wait, what?_

"Uh, twenty-three,"

"Ooh, I remember what it's like to be young, so full of promise! You are the Hokage's apprentice and a medic nin, correct?" _What of it, old man?_

"That's right," Dinner arrives, _thank Kami-sama_, and everyone is busy tucking into their meals, starved by the long, taxing day; Kakashi has finished the miso and half of his Karrage, (Sakura half way through her tempura and Jin through his tofu) before anyone speaks again;

"How long have you been ninja?" It's an open question, but Kakashi could see his eyes are trained upon her; why had he never noticed everyone seemingly so focussed upon her? Because _he's_ never been so focussed on her, obviously.

"Since we were twelve – that's when we became proper ninja though we were trained at the academy before that,"

"Aah, I see…Was it the same for you Kakashi-san?"

"Yes, although I became Genin much younger than these guys,"

"Oh? And were you all randomly assigned as a team?"

"No, when academy students graduate, they are assigned into teams which produces and even level of skill, I was Naruto and Sakura's Jounin instructor then; we still now carry out missions together and separately, even though they are now Jounin themselves," Kakashi explained succinctly and swiftly woofed down the remains of his meal; thankfully dinner didn't last for too much longer, with marginally more small talk exchanged, Kakashi is pleased that he will soon be able to relax.

Much to Kakashi's surprise, Jin offered to pay for their meal (apparently slightly regretfully at Naruto's concept of a portion size) but it was kind of him nonetheless; he decides to walk them back to the inn and – apparently - on one last fit of incredible cheek,

"My dear, I was wondering if you could do me a favour?" Kakashi narrows his eye slightly, stepping back out next to Sakura,

"What would that be?"

"My hip has been acting up a little, I was wondering if you could…"

"Jin-san, it has been a long and tiring day for all of us and Sakura needs to rest if she can complete the work we were requested for, tomorrow."

"But-"

"If your hip is still giving you trouble, then come and see me in the morning, Jin-san, my apologies," Sakura bows slightly and the elderly man looks as though he wanted to protest, but Kakashi shoots him a look daring him to argue,

"Oh, very well, goodnight, Sakura-san, Kakashi-san," Kakashi too bows and turns around to face Sai looking between himself and Sakura inquisitively, it being immediately obvious what internal questions his is asking. Kakashi fishes out the keys, carefully distinguishing which was which before handing one to Sai, hoping to head the boy off before he can ask any awkward questions,

"You and Naruto may as well share; sorry, Sakura, but you'll have to share with me tonight, it was all that was available," Sai opened his mouth to say something but was thankfully cut across by Naruto,

"Ah, I'm tired! Hurry up Sai," All four wander away towards where their simple rooms are located, Kakashi walks purposefully behind Naruto and Sai, allowing them to disappear into their room first. As he unlocks the door and wanders inside, he can see Sakura stop at the sight of the double bed; closing the door first, before he speaks,

"Don't worry, we _are_ on a mission after all and this is all they had… Though, I certainly hope that you wouldn't rather share it with either Naruto or Sai," She couldn't help an involuntary shiver as Kakashi slipped his arms around her, having locked the door,

"Ugh, no way," He grins, pulling his mask from over his nose and pressing his lips to Sakura's.

As Kakashi slips under the covers and folds Sakura to him, both arms finding their way comfortably around her as hers do him; he lifts one hand, arm still wrapped securely around her, and tugs his fingers gently through her hair. She issues a small murmur of contentment and presses a kiss to the base of his neck before she shuffles a little closer, tightening her grip on him as she did so; Kakashi could easily get used to falling asleep like this.


	40. Chapter 40

Ok people, this *might* be the penultimate chapter! Although, if there's anything you particularly want to see happen (not _that_ obviously, lol, it is a T rating XD) then feel free to send me your suggestions! Otherwise… The end is nigh! Still, a double update for the day's not bad after a break, right? ^-^

Title: Genesis_ That's All_

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_40. So Why Does It Always Seem To Be, Me Looking At You, You Looking At Me?_

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><p>It had been difficult to get up that morning, Kakashi was far too comfortable – although a new day beckoned and he <em>was<em> in the middle of a mission so he forced himself up to a seated position, as he scratched his head, idly; he looked over his shoulder at a still-sleeping Sakura – which was admittedly a stupid thing to do as it was surprisingly difficult to resist the temptation to lean down again and scoop her back into his arms.

The room was certainly chilly enough to warrant such an action, Kakashi supposed that it must be closer to winter than he'd realized.

Finding the strength to climb out of bed and ready himself for the day, he soon returned to wake up Sakura (who was already sat up yawning as he returned) and then on to wake up the boys. He'd already correctly guessed that Sai was awake and ready whilst Naruto was still blearily trying to dress himself.

Eventually they made it to breakfast (miso soup and saury was the _only_ way to truly begin the day, in Kakashi's opinion) and his team began to look a little more human whilst they slowly warmed up. As they made their way back towards the work-site, the sun was shining brightly, but it was chilly and held little warmth – he found himself grateful that their journey home (as he hadn't brought a cloak) was not a long one.

As he resumed work on the almost complete building, he couldn't help by allow his eye to drift over to the kuniochi working a few meters away from him, high up on the frame as she had done the day before. His breath caught in his throat as he realized that she wasn't alone, _Sai_ appeared to be stood next to her.

Shifting himself to climb up the building, so that he could listen in on their conversation, whilst remaining completely silent and undetected by Sai. Kakashi had a rather nasty feeling that he knew what any resulting conversation would be focussed around;

"So, Hag, did you and Hatake-san copulate last night?"

"_What?-!_"

"Did you have sex?"

"_No!_ How _dare_ you say something like that! We've been over this before there's nothing going on between Kakashi and I!" Sakura was a brilliant shade of red and Kakashi had to wonder just how stupid Sai was; this topic wasn't exactly one of Sakura's favourites (at least with the pale boy) and pissing off a tremendously strong kuniochi (who's currently holding a hammer) whilst fifteen feet in the air certainly _wasn't_ one of the brightest ideas ever.

"I know, but your insistence that you are not romantically involved seems, now, unlikely," Sakura looked very guarded, but, like Kakashi, it seemed she wanted to know precisely _what_ had led Sai to this conclusion;

"… Why would you think that?"

"Well, Kakashi was abnormally protective of you yesterday in front of the old man, who couldn't possibly have been a threat to you, but did seem to take an interest in you…if by what I've read about what his words and actions meant is true… Also, I've seen you and Hatake-san asleep next to each other on several occasions – you shared a double bed last night and I saw you, a few days ago, asleep on him on top of the Hokage monument-"

"_What!-?_" The alarmed voice of Naruto cut across Sai's words and Sakura's embarrassment – as well as Kakashi's; _how the hell did Sai know these things? _Apparently Kakashi would have to have a stern talk with the boy about the concept of privacy soon,

"What the hell, Sakura-chan! You've been doing _what_ with Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto appeared next to her looking both concerned and angry,

"Oh, calm down, Naruto! You sound like a mother hen! There's nothing going on!" Naruto gripped her upper arms (thankfully their shinobi training kicking in, so that they automatically directed their chakra to their feet) hence they hadn't already fallen off the beams,

"Don't lie to me, Sakura-chan," Kakashi, apparently still unnoticed by the three younger shinobi, decided to step in – they, after all, couldn't really hide from their teammates forever,

"Naruto, let her go," Kakashi leapt across to the other building, standing on one of the beams adjacent to the one Sai was stood on and opposite Naruto and Sakura. The blonde immediately did so and fixed his irate expression on the older man,

"Is this true?" Kakashi eyed Sakura's uncertain expression for a moment,

"If by that you mean, 'are we dating'? Then yes," Naruto looked visibly shocked, apparently not expecting Kakashi to be so blunt or honest,

"Bu-wh-why? He's so old, Sakura-chan…why him?" Sakura, now more annoyed rather than embarrassed knocked her knuckles in a painful sounding punch to the side of Naruto's head,

"_Baka!_"

"I am surprised that you have so openly admitted this, Hatake-san, especially after you so fervently denied it before,"

"That's because there was nothing going on before," Kakashi spoke levelly, but couldn't say he was particularly happy with the situation, "And Naruto, didn't you give us your blessing before? Even though nothing was _actually_ going on at the time,"

"Eh?"

"Idiot, back in Kusa, when you weren't paying attention to Hiro's carriage and instead told me that you didn't have a problem with me…uh…_seeing_ Kakashi? You said you trusted him,"

"I don't remember that," Naruto looked truly confused and Kakashi couldn't help but think he sort-of deserved the second punch Sakura issued,

"Regardless of what you two think, it is Sakura's decision and it is mine. However," Kakashi's voice lowered slightly as he slipped into a more dangerous tone usually reserved for enemies about to take their last breath, "Sakura and I would prefer to keep things quiet, you two will not breathe a word of this to anyone. Do you understand?"

He knew that Naruto would doubtlessly open his big mouth at the first opportunity, but he may as well put the fear of god – or Kakashi – into him in the small hope that Naruto may give _brief_ thought to the consequences first. Both boys nodded, thankfully, but neither looked scared – which was a little annoying, he'd hoped to scare Naruto into silence at least.

"Anyway, now that this has been sorted out, get back to work, we _are_ on a mission," Sai and Sakura immediately leapt away – the latter no doubt glad to be free of the tense situation, but Naruto remained still somewhat glaring at Kakashi, who turned to leap away but remained still,

"What?"

"Kakashi-sensei, if you-" Said Jounin looked back over to meet his eyes,

"Naruto, you know I would not mess around with something as important as this – or with Sakura,"

"…I know,"

"Great!" Kakashi genuinely couldn't resist a grin, "Now there's a building over there that needs your attention more than I," Grumbling slightly, the blonde turned and jumped away; Kakashi himself leaping down to Sakura's side, who was at the back of the building, he could practically _feel_ the embarrassment still radiating off of her.

He quickly swallowed her up in a hug, bringing his mouth down to her ear,

"It was important and needed saying,"

"I know…and I also know it was too much to ask for either of them to use even marginal tact," He chuckled slightly,

"I love you, Sakura,"

"I know and I love you too," Sudden, hysterical laughter erupted from a distant Naruto, causing them to jump apart as he appeared around the corner of the building, looking simultaneously pleased with himself and excited, not realizing what he'd interrupted.

"Sakura-chan, Sakura-chan, if you guys are dating you must have kissed right?" Sakura nodded hesitatingly as Naruto thrust a finger towards Kakashi's face, "So what does he look like under there?" Unable to keep the vein pop from her forehead, Sakura walked towards the blonde, and punched him sharply in the solar plexus,

"_Baka!_ Why would I tell you?"


	41. Chapter 41

Title: _su-su-sudio_ by Phil Collins

Alas! The last chapter! T.T Damn I loved this story! Thank you, everyone who's been kind enough to read this story and provide me with feedback about it! You guys really made this story [100+ reviews boggles my mind 0 . 0!]

So thank you guys and I hope this is a satisfactory ending to a long and much enjoyed (on my part at least XD) story! Apologies for the delay!

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><p><strong><em>I Missed Again<em>**

_41. Now I Know That I'm Too Young, My Life Has Just Begun._

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><p>Kakashi finds himself with a smile under his mask as he walks through the streets of Konoha; it is, of course, expertly hidden by both said mask and his trusty book. Unfortunately, it takes him a little while to realize that he hasn't turned a page for well over fifteen minutes, whilst he muses of the past mission (and future days) and in the time it takes him to notice – another has also.<p>

"Well, _you're_ looking better than before," The sebon chewing tokabetsu Jounin lands in front of his old friend, "I heard an interesting rumour from Ino, I wonder if that has anything to do with it?" Kakashi internally sighs as the smile is quickly peeled off his face and replaced with his well-practiced couldn't-be-less-interested expression,

"Oh? Why would you think so?" He doesn't like Genma's grin one bit,

"Well, it does relate to you, and a certain woman you spend a great deal of time with, who apparently, has pink hair…and the fact that you're grinning like an idiot helps the case,"

"And? Why would you believe something a silly as a rumour? I'd have thought you'd have grown up at least a _little_ bit by now, Genma,"

"Uh, Ino is Sakura's best friend, isn't she? Can't get any more reliable than that… Besides, if you're now _with _Sakura, shouldn't you know this?"

"No, just as I'm sure Sakura doesn't know or care about the fact that you _claim_ to be my friend," _Shit._

"Oh-ho! So it _is _true! _Damn_," The sebon in his mouth bounces lightly as he looks the silver-haired shinobi up and down for a moment, Kakashi isn't sure who deserved the punch more, himself or the man in front of him.

"Well?"

"Well, what?" Kakashi decides it is safer to bury himself in his book,

"Are you sure?" Kakashi can't help himself pausing and raising his eye to meet Genma's, his question unspoken but not unheard, "Are you sure you know what you're doing? She is an awful lot younger than you and your previous student – are you sure you didn't force her into it?" The thunderous rage which flashes over Kakashi's face makes Genma instantly fear for his life (or use of his limbs) but he manages to recover fast enough,

"Hey, hey, I know you'd never do anything like that, but I'm not going to be the only one asking questions, here," The Copy Nin sighs heavily,

"I know…I know," Genma grinned again,

"Just make her happy, Kakashi, she seems to be doing the same for you,"

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><p>Sakura dropped her chart on the desk and sighed, heavily, <em>stupid day, stupid people, stupid gossips<em>; Sakura _was_ having a good day – it had started out delightfully by waking up next to the man she loved, but had rapidly gone downhill after she'd been forced to leave her apartment.

Ino's excessively big mouth had gotten her into trouble by essentially shouting the gossip she'd heard from a _certain blonde idiot_ (who's subsequently earned himself two black eyes, when she finds him,) had then alerted everyone within a three hundred meter radius (which covered an awful lot of people in a hospital, apparently).

Sakura, now in the process of heading towards Tsunade-shishou's office, is in a less-than-stellar mood; knocking softly on the wooden door, she secretly hopes that the Hokage wants to see her for a completely unrelated reason, (she also checks her anger at the same time,)

"Enter,"

"Tsunade-shishou, you wanted to see me?"

"Ah, yes, Sakura, come in," The pink-haired kuniochi closed the door behind her and took a few tentative (although it is well-hidden) steps towards the elder blonde, "What's this I've been hearing about a certain grey-haired lover of yours?"

"_What?_"

"I've been hearing rumours all day, had you hoped to keep it a secret?"

"Uh-I-uh-"

"How long?" There is something beyond _odd_ in the woman's tone, it isn't anger – not even a quiet one – but there is _something_;

"Not long, almost a week," She nods, resting her chin on her clasped hands,

"Did you want to keep it a secret?"

"Well, we weren't going to lie if asked, but neither were we planning on advertising it," _Keep calm and cool_, Sakura decided that was the best option right now, not that her shishou could _really_ do anything, but pissing the woman off was never a good idea;

"So how did it get out?"

"Naruto and Sai had been clucking about it and Kakashi though it wise to set them straight – and of course, Naruto wouldn't know the meaning of 'quiet' if it walked up and shook his hand,"

"What does this mean to you, Sakura? Is this supposed to be something short-term and nondescript or something…_more_?" Sakura fights to keep the blush which creeps up; when she comes across the next person gossiping, she will personally _pound_ them so that they will fear to speak another word, ever again,

"It isn't meaningless to me, shishou, it isn't just something 'because I feel like it'; Kakashi has said the same and I trust him,"

"You understand the risks, of course,"

"How could I not?" _How indeed?_

"Relax, Sakura, I'm not angry – frankly I think I knew about it before you did,"

"Wh-what?" The Godaime grins,

"There _are_ times when Kakashi can be surprisingly transparent," Sakura feels only more confused, "But never mind about that, I'm glad you seem to have given this thought – although, I know, of course, Kakashi wouldn't let anything happen under such frivolous circumstances,"

"Uh, shishou-"

"I'm glad you're feeling better, Sakura, it's about time you stopped living in regret…about time he did, too; dismissed," Sakura, pausing for a few minutes, willing herself to say something eventually gave up and merely mechanically bowed and turned on her heel, wandering out of the office and through the administration building until she reached the exit; _what the hell just happened?_

…

Naruto wanders down the street in search of dinner, his attention is drawn by a splotch of pink and he's tempted to call out but he sees a familiar masked man leaning against the wall, with his arms crossed, his attention focussed solely on the kuniochi. Naruto affords the time to watch them for a moment, a smile finding its way to his face in happiness as he could see how delighted she looks, at the sight of their former sensei.

Said man stands up a little and in the predominantly empty evening streets, he tugs her close to him, engulfing her in his arms; Naruto has to admit, it _was_ a little weird at first, hearing – from Kakashi's mouth no less – that he was dating the medic nin, and the words _had_ made the blonde slightly suspicious. But the unpredictable ninja can't argue with how happy they both look and, frankly, Naruto can't think of anyone he trusts more looking after Sakura-chan, than Kakashi-sensei.

Grinning to himself, he trots off down the road, leaving them both be, as his stomach demanded his attention; as he traces the streets down towards Ichiraku's, he thinks about what Sasuke's reaction will be when he finds out, just the very idea brings a slight snigger to his lips. Won't Sasuke-teme be surprised?

(It should be too long, either, before Sakura-chan gives in and tells him what Kakashi-sensei really looks like.)

…

As Sakura steps out of the building, she rubbed her palm over her eye and forehead, as she steps out into the cool night air an immediately familiar presence causing a grin to find its way to her face.

"Long day?"

"You've no idea," Sakura merely allows him to pull her close, not having previously realized how cold she felt, until the relaxing warmth of him surrounds her,

"Aa, I think I have an idea – guess we couldn't trust Naruto to say quiet could we?"

"Nah…at least he means well, though, which is more than I can say for some," He squeezes her tight for a split second before letting go, "Aah, I'm hungry…want to get some dinner?"

"Come to mine, I happy to cook…although I'll need to stop off to pick up a few extra items," The both step away and amble, easily down the street; they walk close together but avoid direct touch,

"What did the Godaime want? I presume that _was_ the reason why you were in that building?"

"It was and frankly, she just wanted to sort through the gossip – I thought she was going to give me a hard time over it, to be honest, but then she just said that she knew before I did," She trails of, feeling slightly confused and anxious, (shishou really could be an odd woman when she feel like it);

"Aa," Yes, maybe he could attest to that,

Sakura, it seems, was correct, when she predicted that it would be the civilians who'd the most offended by the sight of them; as she and Kakashi walk down the street, most of the non-shinobi residents of Konoha they pass, pause to whisper something.

She has to admit, she _does_ feel a little self-conscious being pointed at like an exhibit and having the people, without the courage to speak clearly, whispering just loudly enough to hear; it is as demeaning as it is irritating.

Kakashi, in his typically laid back style seems nonplussed or, perhaps even enjoying it, as he slides an arm around Sakura, his hand coming to rest on her waist (much to the surprise of a woman stood nearby with a small boy clinging to her skirt as he stands half hiding behind her).

He squeezes Sakura tight for a moment before letting go and simultaneously dragging out _Icha Icha Tactics_, calmly flipping to the right page and burying himself in the text.

Sakura is forced to bite her lip to prevent herself laughing as the woman's surprised expression immediately turns to one of absolute incredulousness; it certainly does seem that Kakashi gets quite a kick out of prodding those who can't or won't challenge him, regardless of their opinions.

She can still hear the huffs of indignation and disapproval, but frankly, civilians gossiping is something she can cope with – she has very little interaction with them on a day-to-day basis, Sakura deals only with shinobi – and most of them, even if they do disapprove, have enough sense to keep their mouths shut. Lest they incur either wraths of an, equally terrifying, Sakura or Kakashi.

"I'll be a few moments, alright?" Kakashi looks up from his book as they came to a halt in front of a small 24h shop, Sakura nods, throwing in a smile for good measure as she leans against the wall next to the shop, her mind thinking about everything and nothing. She is pulled from her trance by two young voices, Sakura stands up from the wall and turns to face them, dreading what she can guess is coming next;

"Uh, Haruno-san?" Two young-ish girls are stood, huddled together, Genin probably,

"Yes?"

"C-can we ask you something?"

"What?"

"W-well, is it true that you're dating Hatake-sensei?" Sakura sighs, knowing that there isn't very much she can do to prevent them ever speaking about it again (or, at least, not without the loss of her rank);

"Hai, it's true; is this causing a problem?"

"N-No! B-but he's so _old_ and a… well, a _pervert_; I mean, all those books he reads!" Sakura sighs, gritting her teeth against her irritation but deciding to give them a little more than silence, this time;

"Well…have you ever considered that those things are _benefits_? A bit of maturity is a good thing in a man, after all; and as for those books – let's just say that he knows what he's doing,"

Sakura threw in a suggestive smile for good measure as the two girls' eyes widen before glancing at each other, whilst biting their lips, they quickly turn and scurry away just as an arm wraps itself around her waist and a chin (which she now recognises as Kakashi's) comes to rest on her shoulder,

"I'm glad you're so open minded, Sakura-chan," His tone is completely teasing, but Sakura can't help but involuntarily tense; she isn't a virgin but Kakashi _does_ have superior experience and she can't help a bolt of nervousness before he continues:

"I'm glad we can have some fun,"


End file.
